How to Lose Your Virginity
by Miggery
Summary: Surely Matthew Williams isn't your average 19 year-old. He works at a sex shop, his best friend is a contract killer, and 14 different people are pursuing him, including a sexy albino man. For what reason? One million dollars. Rated M!PruCan YAOI.Language
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Dear readers, I'm glad you're reading this~ I am proud to announce: I HAVE A NEW SERIES! (: Wheee! I hope you enjoy this very much! Hitman!Poland is here for you, since I know he was a very successful character in the last fic I did. :D -Jayleen

WARNING: I didn't have enough space to put this in the summary, but this story is rated M for a reason! DRUG USE, VIOLENCE, SEX, LANGUAGE...ETC. Please be cautious, it is a YAOI! If you don't like it, please do not read it! Thank you~ Disclaimer: I hate writing this, but it must be done. If I get sued, I'll lose my pencil. ): It's the only thing I own. HENCE: I DO NOT OWN HETALIA.

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><p>Matthew "Hey, like, Matthew? Are you listening to me? At all? Hello?"<p>

The violet-eyed teen whipped his head in shock, staring at his co-worker in confusion. Ever since Matthew was hired as a cashier at the sex shop, he's been acting a bit off, and his friend was sincerely worried for him.

"What?"

Feliks rolled his eyes in irritation, "I asked you to go re-stock the dildos," the Polish man deadpanned, as if it were the most normal thing in the world.

The Canadian still wasn't used to his best friend's bluntness, but Feliks sure was growing on him.

Blushing, Matthew nodded, stalking off to the storage room to bring out boxes and boxes of dildos.

...

I bet you're wondering why our poor, innocent little Matthew works at a sex shop, when there are so many opportunities to find much better jobs at regular stores in Los Angeles.

Thing is; none of those regular stores pay enough money in the world to support the blond. Plus, Feliks worked there as a manager. Matthew sighed as he unpacked a rubbery, pink, dildo.

He stared at it, wondering how people could actually deal with using one of those things.

_I wonder if people feel guilty after using this..._

His face was painted pink, as he shut his eyes tight, placing the sex toy on a shelf in the store.

Feliks trudged over to his friend, helping him with his work, before pausing and staring at his purple-eyed friend.

"Matthew, are you like, asexual?" The Polish man's viridian eyes were locked on Matthew, awaiting an answer from the frozen Canadian.

Matthew's jaw was hung open, "I-I ... NO! I like.. I... I... I've just..."

Feliks arched a brow, "I've never seen you like, date. Ever." He shrugged, "I just wanted to confirm that you're still a virgin."

"I-I'm not a v-virgin! And even if I was, I...there's nothing wrong with keeping it until I'm married, so there," Matthew concluded, raising his nose up into the air.

Feliks snorted a laugh, "'Aiight broski, but if you ever need some relief, call me. I know a totally hot guy to introduce you to!"

The Polish man stated with a wink.

"W-What! What makes you think I'm gay?"

Feliks gave him a void expression, "Oh please Matthew. There's no way in Hell, a guy as cute, clean, and nice as you, is straight."

He had a point.

Matthew was a mysophobic. He dreaded germs.

Matthew was about to protest, when a few customers walked into the store, allowing Feliks to make the perfect getaway.

He pouted, while trying his best to glare daggers at his friend. If looks could kill, Feliks would have a paper cut.

Hey, at least it would sting.

...

"Williams!" Matthew's skin crawled, as his boss entered the store, ordering the Canadian to get to his office that moment.

His boss wasn't one of those old, creepy men. He didn't look intimidating at all. He was actually one of Matthew's close friends outside of work.

Truth be told, the owner of the store was someone his own age, who inherited the store against his will.

His name: Lovino Vargas.

The Italian man lost a bet to his younger, more care-free, twin brother, Feliciano.

His grandfather was retiring, and had to pass down his family restaurant and his sex shop. He had a contest for his two grandsons to see who would be able to own the most notorious Italian restaurants in all of Southern California.

Unfortunately for Lovino, Feliciano won the restaurant, leaving him with the sex shop and very unsatisfied.

"Yes Boss?"

For some reason, the Italian loved it when people called him 'Boss Romano', it made him feel powerful I'm guessing.

Running a hand through his dark chocolate-colored hair, Lovino sighed, "Feli got a boyfriend."

Matthew arched a brow at his old friend, sitting down in a comfortable chair in front of Lovino's desk.

"That's why you look so depressed?"

There was a tinge of sadness in the boss' face for but a moment, "I-I'm not depressed, idiot. I'm just...kind of glum. He doesn't need me anymore."

The Canadian smiled, then got up from his seat to rub the Italian's back, "Lovino, he's grown up. Of course he still needs you, you're his only brother. He just needs someone to love. You do too!"

Lovino furrowed his brows together, his lips curved up slightly, "Thanks Matteo, I'm glad I could talk to you about this. But it's kind of funny you're telling me to find love," he said with a smirk, "after all," he paused, "you're the virgin."

...

_Virgin. Virgin. Virgin! Virgin!_

That word was all the blond could think about after he left his friend's office.

He was now in his Civic, driving back to his condo. Lovino's words really stung! He didn't realize how much he was missing out on in life until that day.

The joy of going out with people, the joy of partying and drinking.

Even the really crappy sensation you get when you know you're wasted!

He missed out on everything.

His grip on the steering wheel tightened.

This is why he'd been acting strange.

Ever since he got his job at the store, he realized that he'd missed out on risk. He heard so many stories about his friend's crazy sexcapades, and adventures. He wondered why he'd never done anything that crazy and reckless.

Oh that's right, he was always too afraid to take the chance. The Canadian was pathetic, he buried his head in books all day, avoiding things that would hurt him, including love.

What was he suppose to do? Shelter himself from fun for his entire life?

No!

Enough was enough. Matthew Williams was going to take a plunge this year. He was going to venture to no man's land!

The Canadian was going to do every barbaric action that popped into his mind.

The blond man grinned at the idea, and said to himself softly, "No backing down."

...

Feliks was on his way home, when he began to think of his blond coworker.

He felt guilty that Matthew never had a sexual encounter, and he blamed himself for it.

The green-eyed man had always been on the...eccentric side, and had barely any friends, but nonetheless, Matthew had the heart to befriend him in grade school, making the Canadian an outcast.

Since then, Matthew had always been ignored, and practically invisible. He had friends, just not many, and Feliks believed that it was his fault.

Feliks was the high school transexual. He was constantly harassed and looked down upon by his peers, earning himself a horrible reputation among his classmates. He wasn't actually transgender, he just went to school in drag.

The cruel pranks and gestures towards the Polish man left him unfazed.

He was used to blades in his shoes, and poison in his food, due to the fact that his familly was filled with contract killers.

The only reason why he worked at the stupid sex shop, was because of the fact that Lovino was a Mafia leader and also his boss who set up clients for him.

It was hard balancing his life as a hitman and a student in high school.

Thankfully for them, they both graduated, so they wouldn't have to deal with their peer's ignorant and rude behavior or the fact that Feliks had a secret identity.

Feliks stared at the road before him with a blank look.

What did he have to do to make Matthew happy? T

ruthfully, Feliks would do anything for his friend. After all, Matthew had been there for him through thick and thin. It was his turn to return the favor. For a millisecond, Feliks shut his eyes and thought about what he would do to ensure his Canadian man's happiness.

His face brightened incredulously when he figured just how to turn Matthew's mundane life into something extraordinary.

He smirked, _I'm like, so fucking amazing._ He crunched his foot down onto the breaks, causing the cars behind him to crash into one another, before making a u-turn, and driving maniacally towards his next destination.

...

The Polish man strutted into the smoky room, not caring that the men were staring at him with the most questioning gazes.

"H-Honey," Feliks' boyfriend Toris, began, "what are you doing here?"

Feliks smiled at him, popping out a brand new Springfield XDM Compact 3.8" gun, and raising it to the ceiling.

Every head in the room was now turned, staring at the brunette's insane contract killer of a boyfriend.

"Toris, you're boyfriend's gone insane!" Nikolai cried, clinging onto his Danish lover.

"Feliks...put the gun down," Matthias said slowly, almost jumping up in fear, as the gun was pointed towards him.

The Polish man rolled his eyes, "I'll be the one talking here, bitch," he growled.

Matthias' eyes widened, his mouth opened to say something, but his boyfriend slapped a hand over his lips. Feliks stared at everyone. All his boyfriend's acquaintances, from the perverted Frenchman, to the egoistical albino, all gathered up in one room.

Said room was filled with nothing but dead silence.

Dead silence, and the triumph of a very satisfied Polish man.

Oh how he loved being in control.

He smiled, "That's so much better." He lowered his gun, walking around the room, making sure to grin at each and every face he saw. "I have a totally badass proposition for all of you."

Twenty faces gaped at him in alarm. "Kolkolkolkol... And what would that be, Feliks?" Ivan, one of Toris' 'friends', asked.

A few of the men all nodded in agreement. "_Oui,_ Feliks, what could possibly be so important?" The perverted Frenchman decided to join in on the questioning.

There was a slight sparkle in the Polish man's eyes as he was about to reveal his plan.

"One million dollars," he began, already making a few people in the room perk up with interest, "one million dollars will be given to the person who woos and takes the virginity of Matthew Williams."

"Who?" They all chorused, cocking their heads to the side.

There was only one person, besides Feliks, who knew exactly who the violet-eyed man was.

Mischievous crimson eyes glistened at the thought of taking the young and innocent Canadian. He licked his lips, not caring who saw. Feliks scoffed in disgust, "If you don't know who he is, then fucking figure it out of you want my money. Contact me if you're in."

He rolled his eyes, grabbing his boyfriend by the hand, and making his way to the door.

"Wait! How do we know if you're for real, aru?" Feliks paused at the doorstep, then reached into his pockets. He flashed a wad of one-hundred dollar bills, flipping through each one. "This wad of hundreds is ten-thousand dollars. I mean what I say," he stated seriously.

A few of their mouths watered. "I'm in!" Yong Soo called out.

"Oui, me too," Francis said with a smirk. In the next ten minutes, almost everyone in the room had joined in the competition to steal Matthew's virginity, with the exception of Antonio, Ludwig, Matthias, Nikolai, Tino and Berwald.

Feliks let out a smirk of victory, "Okay then, I'm glad you've compromised," he pulled his lover closer to him, causing the brunette to blush, "but there all rules."

"Rules, huh?" Gilbert asked with a scoff.

Feliks whipped his head towards the albino, "Yes, rules," he began. "Rule one: You can't force anything onto him. If any of you force Matthew at all, I will personally kill you," he stated clearly, making some of the men (and the one woman) shrivel back in their spots.

"Rule two: You have to woo and take him, while he's like sober. If Matthew lost his virginity while he's totally passed out, and has absolutely no recollection of what happened whatsoever, I will also kill you."

Some of the people in the room seemed to have second thoughts about the competition, due to the fact that Feliks was fucking crazy, and it seemed like anything they did would get them killed.

"Last rule. Number three, like, the most important rule... You're not just taking Matthew's virginity. When you woo him, I want him to like, experience love, since he's never gotten the chance. If you're not up for totally falling in love with him, I suggest you like, give up now, because this boy's totally for real. If you crush his heart..."

"You'll kill us," they all muttered in agreement.

Feliks beamed evilly, "I'm glad you guys see it my way. Like, ciao!" He strutted out of the building, his lover in tow.

...

"Do any of you guys know who Matthew Williams is, aru?" Yao asked, wondering if the Polish man was speaking the truth or not.

"Doesn't ring a bell at all. The lad is practically sixes and sevens," Arthur commented, rolling his eyes. Francis and Gilbert gaped at him, mouthing, 'what the fuck?'

"Lo siento...I don't know who he is," Antonio shrugged his shoulders, "but it's not like I'll enter the competition anyways. I don't need money or love when I have Lovi!~"

"The name doesn't ring a bell at all," Tino scrunched his eyebrows together, trying to help his friends out, even if he wasn't competing.

A sleepy Greek man stepped into the room, toppling over as he stepped in.

Yawning, he asked from the floor, "What did I miss?"

They all kept quiet from the man. When it came to wooing people, Heracles was a fucking boss.

He was almost as terrible as Francis. Except for the fact that Francis went for anyone.

Heracles waited for people to come to him. "Nothing," Francis said quickly.

With that, Heracles drifted off to his slumber.

"Gilberto?" Antonio asked, nudging his albino friend in the stomach.

The scarlet-eyed man seemed to be in deep thought. "Huh?" he asked, his face was completely blank.

The Spaniard stared at him, "Are you alright?" Gilbert took one hit from the joint that was being passed around the room.

"I'm fucking awesome. Better than awesome, I'm fucking stoned," he said nonchalantly, offering the blunt to the Spaniard, who declined politely.

"Fucking...Matthew Williams huh? Never thought I'd hear that name again," he whispered to himself.

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><p>AN: hello there, honies (: This was it! The first chapter of 'How to Lose Your Virginity' I hope you liked it! The plot shall thicken!~ Oh gawsh... I just love Heracles. By the way, there were Twenty people in total. I mentioned a few, can you guess the rest? ;D And yes, they were smoking weed. \: Well, some of them were. But anyways, this story will be funny, but there shall be less crack and less OOC-ness (I hope)! Anyways, REVIEW PLEASE. REVIEW! (:


	2. IVAN 1

**A/N: Hello there kiddies. (: I hope you enjoyed chapter one! On to chapter two! Oh goodness, I have a feeling writing this story is going to be challenging.. I'll try my best! :D Oh goodness...Poor Antonio.  
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**Disclaimer: I do not own anything. Ever.  
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><p><strong>Gilbert<strong>

After hanging out with his friends, Gilbert made a pact to himself. He'd be the one to take Matthew. No matter what, he'd do it.**  
><strong>He began by calling Francis and Antonio over.

"Hola Gil!~ What is it that you need us for?" Antonio asked with a smile, greeting his friend cheerfully, as he walked into Gilbert's house.

Gilbert stood silently with a smirk, leaning against his doorway.

Francis groaned, "Mon ami, it's eight o'clock, hurry up and tell us so I can go back home and get my beauty sleep," The blond Frenchman stated seriously.

"I need both of your guys' help." Francis paled, as Gilbert began his plan.

The blond had always been a bit apprehensive about the way Gilbert thought through his ideas. They never ended well, but the blue-eyed man listened intently nonetheless.

"I want you guys to help me with the competition," he stated, ignoring the groan of protest that came from both of his friends.

Antonio sighed, "Gilbo, I know you want the money, but I already promised myself I wouldn't enter Feliks' death-trap of a game."

"What exactly do you need help with Gilbert?" Francis asked, the albino opened his door, allowing his friends to step into his house.

**...**

The pair sat down in Gilbert's living room, waiting for the albino to spill his plan to them the plan.

"I want you guys to help me track down Matthew Williams," Gilbert began, completely neglecting Antonio's 'Who's that?', "once you find him, I'll make my move. If I do win this competition, we'll split the money in half."

Antonio furrowed his brows, "Why can't we split it equally between the three?"

Gilbert stared at him, "It's going to be split in two because I'm giving you five-hundred grand, and Francis five-hundred grand."

"You mean you're not taking any of the money?" the Frenchman asked, gaping at the albino in amazement.

The crimson-eyed man shook his head, "I don't want a cent of the money at all," he stated honestly.

The Spaniard and the Frenchman were in shock, as they both passed each other a look of pure amusement. "Okay Gil, but if I may ask, _por qué haces __esto_?"

"Did you just ask me to cook your pig?" Gilbert asked, confused at his Spanish friend's foreign words.

Antonio deadpanned, "Why are you doing this? _En serio_, I though _you_ would only be in it for the money. Don't tell me you actually _like_ this person?"

Francis passed the albino a curious gaze, "You know him, _non_?"

The albino's cheeks tinted pink, "I have some unfinished business with him," he began, scratching his neck lazily, "b-but that's not the point," he coughed, trying to give his friends a serious look. But behind those deep, crimson eyes, his friends knew that he'd heard of this strange, 'Matthew Williams' person.

Gilbert passed them each a pleading stare. The albino needed to find Matthew, before someone else did.

"Fine, we'll help," they both said in unison, earning themselves a giant tackle-bear-hug-of-doom by a certain silver-haired man.

**...**

"I'll run some scans on the database at work," Antonio sighed, saying goodbye to his friends, and walking out the door. Things at his headquarters were becoming pretty hectic. The FBI was dealing with a serious Mafia problem, and Antonio, being one of the special agents on the case, was designated as the leader of the whole enchilada.

It didn't help that his friends were always getting into trouble as well. Always smoking that damned pot, he grimaced at the smell of it, but he didn't have the heart to tell them not to do it. He kept a low profile on them, so that no one would be caught. Especially him, for he would lose his job.

He sighed, wondering when he'd ever find the notorious, 'Boss Romano' and the mysterious Matthew Williams. He had a lot of things on his plate to balance.

Man, he needed a day off. And what better things are there to do than spend quality time, with your (kind of, sort of) lover. The Spaniard smiled at the thought of spending time with Lovino.

_That would be asombroso_... He trailed off, daydreaming about the feisty Italian. Poor, poor, naive Antonio.

**Matthew**

Matthew was going to turn his image around completely. He wanted to be noticed, and he wanted to be loved. The Canadian wanted to live on the edge, so... he took his sweater off that day.

What an achievement.

"Hey Matthew," Feliks greeted, as the violet-eyed man walked in. The green-eyed man went on about his night last night. Something to do with him thrusting into his boyfriend.

"It was like, totally hot. I never knew Liet could be so submissive," he said, a sparkle in his eyes.

Matthew nodded his head, acting like he was interested in his best friend's one-way conversation.

So far, the Polish man hadn't noticed Matthew's new look, which irked him slightly. He interrupter the blond, "H-Hey Feliks...?"

Pausing, the viridian-eyed man passed his Canadian friend a curious glance, "Yeah?"

"D-Do you n-notice anything different about me?" Matthew was pretty proud, he was wearing his favorite t-shirt. It was red, with a white maple leaf in the center.

Feliks furrowed his brows, "No. Except for the fact that you're wearing that totally hideous shirt." Ouch.

Frowning, Matthew protested, "I-I...this is my favorite shirt..." Aw...Poor Matthew just got dissed. He was hurt that his friend thought his shirt was hideous.

He really tried to spice things up by taking his usual baggy sweater off.

**...**

The Polish man was amused, he laughed as Matthew walked away from him with a pout. At least Matthew was actually making an attempt to change the way he dressed. That was a start!

The Canadian walked into the storage room to go re-stock more of the bestiality DVDs.

The bell attached to the door rang, as a tall, familiar Russian man stepped into the shop, a dark aura and a very terrified looking Latvian followed him.

"Hello there Feliks, wonderful day we're having, da?" He said, smiling sinisterly. Too bad he didn't affect Feliks at all.

The Polish man grinned back at him, "Hey Ivan what can I do you for?"

"Where's Matthew Williams?"

The Canadian popped out from the storage room, struggling to lift the heavy box of DVDs. Feliks glanced at his friend, then back at Ivan, pointing with his girly, pink, nail polish-covered index finger.

The scarfed man smirked, "This is going to be easier than I expected." Feliks glared at him, reminding him of the rules. Ivan ignored the Polish man, and made his way over towards the distressed blond.

"You'd like some help, da?" Ivan asked politely, taking the opposite end of the box, and lifting the box completely out of Matthew's grasp.

Matthew looked up at the light haired man in front of him, "T-Thank you!" He stuttered, embarrassed that the other was much stronger than him.

The Russian wore a triumphant smirk, "You're very welcome, Matvey."

Matthew froze, "How do you know my name?" Ivan arched a brow, then pushed a finger up against Matthew's name tag.

"Oh... I knew that."

He leaned over, whispering into the Canadian's ear seductively, "Would you like to become one with me?" Ivan's eyes were hazy, as Matthew's heart started to beat a bit faster because of the Russians close proximity.

His face flushed, as Ivan leaned in close to kiss him. Matthew took a few steps back, completely creeped out that a stranger was trying to come on to him at work.

"U-Uhm.. Yeah.. Um.. about that, my boss is l-like right in th-that room. So I can't joke around s-sir, s-sorry," Matthew said quickly, flailing his body around, like a fish that came ashore.

Ivan narrowed is eyes, biting back a dirty remark for a moment, but remembered the rules.

He didn't want to be mangled to death by a psychotic Polish man. The Russian passed Matthew an obviously fake smile, but the Canadian didn't see the feigned kindness, "Well, that's alright Matvey. I'll be back sometime," he stated, brushing his palm against Matthew's soft cheek, "but in case you need someone," he paused "call me."

He pulled out a slip of paper, stuffing it into Matthew's back pocket, giving the Canadian's ass a tight squeeze. Matthew jumped up in surprise, as Ivan pulled away with a chuckle, snapping his fingers at the Latvian boy who came into the store with him.

The pair walked out of the building, not even bothering to say goodbye to Feliks.

The Polish man had seen everything. He glared through the door, watching as Ivan got into his car, wearing a satisfied expression. Feliks was very unhappy about this.

He hadn't expected Ivan to be the first one to try to woo Matthew, he wanted someone a bit less on the evil side to take the blond. Like Yao. He was nice.

Matthew looked down at the floor, blushing lightly. _So taking off my sweater did work! _

He grinned at his success, "Feliks! My 'hideous shirt' made a guy give me his number! So ha! Who's wearing the hideous shirt now?"

"I totally saw, I totally saw," Feliks said, chuckling at how completely dense the Canadian was, "but you're still the one wearing the hideous shirt..." he muttered to himself, but his friend heard, and a dildo collided with Feliks' head moments later.

"Jerk!" Matthew played, laughing while sending his friend the bird.

**...**

Lovino arrived at the shop right around closing time.

"Yo bitches. Wanna go shopping with me?" The Italian asked, but it sounded more like a statement.

Feliks' eyes lit up. Shopping was his favorite thing, besides Liet, that he loved to do! "Hell yes!"

"I...I...I don't know-" But Matthew remembered that he had to take the risk, and do something dangerous. Not that shopping was dangerous, it just wasn't Matthew's scene. Feliks stared at him.

"Okay, let's go," he said, determination in his voice. Lovino and Feliks smiled lightly, all three of them hopping into the Italian's slick, black Maserati Granturismo.

Lovino took pride in his baby. He loved the car to death, and he didn't let just anyone sit in it's fine, leather seats, let alone touch the exterior of it.

They drove for about twenty minutes, passing the exit to the Glendale Galleria. "H-Hey, Lovino, the Galleria is that way," Matthew piped up, pointing towards the freeway exit that they had driven by.

"We're going to the Promenade," Feliks and Lovino stated. How did Feliks know where they were going?

Why was the car ride so silent?

Something was up, and the blond had a fishy feeling in the pit of his stomach that the day would not end well.

"Hey Lovino," Feliks snapped Matthew out of his thoughts.

"What?"

"Put this on," The Polish man suggested, tossing Matthew a pile of clothes that looked too tight for Matthew taste.

"D-Do I have to-"

"Yes," Both Lovino and Feliks replied, not even glancing at the Canadian in the backseat.

"Fine..."

**FLASHBACK: Before Matthew Was On Shift!**

Lovino was about to walk out of his shop at around 10 AM, as Feliks arrived in his pink Prius.

"Could you have gotten a more gay car?" The Italian asked with a scoff.

Feliks smiled, "The dealer told me that this was the gayest car they had available."

The hazel-eyed man chortled, getting down to business, "Do you have any news for me, dick licker?"

"Yeah, I saw your fine ass boyfriend with the stoners last night. I made a totally insane bargain with them," Feliks stated, twisting his hair with on finger.

Lovino growled, his cheeks turning a shade of red, "Antonio is not my boyfriend. But I have to admit, he has a fine ass," he trailed off, thinking about the lax Spaniard. Feliks coughed.

"R-right, um..what was the bargain?"

"Well, I offered one million dollars to the person who woos and sleeps with Matthew first, fourteen people are participating in this 'contest'," The viridian-eyed man stated simply.

Lovino laughed, "That's rich! I feel kind of bad for Matthew! I bet that perverted ass Francis joined in!"

"He did. And so did Ivan...and Roderich, Roderich's girlfriend, Lars, and a couple of other people. Oh! And I never thought he'd join, but like, guess which crazy albino joined?"

Lovino's eyes widened, "Gilbert joined? What the hell?"

"You'd think he'd be the one to sit back and totally laugh at everyone fail, right?" Feliks chuckled.

"Wow. I kind of want in on this," The hazelnut-haired man smirked.

Feliks laughed, ruffling his boss' hair, "In your dreams. Your boyfriend would die!"

"HE'S NOT MY FUCKING BOYFRIEND!" Lovino threw his arms up in the air, the blush coming back again as he began muttering curses in Italian, walking to his car.

"Lovino! Wait, I have a plan!" Feliks called back, jogging to his boss.

The Italian rolled his eyes, "What?"

"I want Gilbert to win. Invite Ludwig, Gilbert, and your brother to come to Santa Monica with us. We can like, convince Matthew to go!"

"..." Lovino gawked at the green-eyed man, "Are you fucking insane? Why would you want _Gilbert_ to win? He's a fucking crazy albino bastard."

Feliks huffed, "Just trust me alright? I have a knack for chemistry. And those two totally have it," he declared firmly.

The Italian man scoffed, "Fine, whatever." Lovino was about to drive away after he started his car, but Feliks stopped him.

"You know that chemistry I was talking about?"

"Yeah bitch, I know. They have chemistry... blah blah blah. Can I go?"

Feliks curved his lips upward, "Antonio and you have it as well." Lovino's body stiffened, as he blushed.

"W-Whatever, bastard. Go munch on your boyfriend's ass."

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><p><strong>AN: HONHONHON!~ Feliks was on the albino's side? WHUUT? O_O Kay, well PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE! REVIEW! D; REVIEWS MAKE MY DAY AND GIVE ME INSPIRATION!**


	3. ELIZAVETA 1

**A/N: LOVELIES~ I'm glad you guys liked chapter 2! (: Haahha! Please do not be afraid to leave me a review. Please. EACH REVIEW. Makes me smile (: I love smiling. Hurhur! On to the Promenade! Yes, the Promenade is an actual outdoor shopping center in Santa Monica. KAY! TIME FOR CHAPTER 3!~ Mmm...just had the best pancake ever.  
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**Disclaimer: I do not own Forever21.  
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><p><strong>Before the Meet<br>**

When Lovino called Feliciano, the younger twin burst out in tears of joy. "_Fratello_! This is the happiest day of my life! I'm so glad you accept me and Luddy!~"

You could practically hear Lovino roll his eyes through the phone, "_**Yeah. Okay, that's nice bastard. Listen, you have to tell Potato-bastard to bring Potato-bastard Number Two. It's mandatory that he's there.**_"

"Why do you want Gilbert to come?" It's kind of funny how Feliciano knew he was talking about Gilbert.

The older Italian sighed, "_**P-P...Pl...plea...JUST DO IT DAMMIT.**_" And that's when Lovino hung up the phone, leaving a confused Feliciano to dial tone.

**Gilbert**

The albino groaned, slumping his body over his younger brother's.

"But West...I don't want to go to Santa Monica! There are always a bunch of creepy street performers who ask me for money!" He whined, grabbing his brother by the collar, and shaking him roughly.

Ludwig kept his calm composure, "You're coming with us. That's final," he declared simply, slapping his brother's hands away. The albino pouted, crossing his arms over his chest, and stuck his tongue out at his younger brother, who in turn sighed. "You're such a child," Ludwig ran his fingers through his blond, slicked hair.

"You're mom's a child!" The crimson-eyed man retorted. Ludwig gave him a confused face, about to open his mouth to say something, but decided against it.

"Just get ready," he said, shaking his head, and making his was back to his room, "I'll pick you up at your house. So go."

**...**

Since the albino loved causing trouble, he invited Churro and Frenchie with him. If he was invited, why not invite his two best friends?

They all sat in Gilbert's living room, drinking ice cold lemonade.

The albino had drank all his German beer, and refused to drink the shitty American kind that Ludwig bought at the convenience store.

"So why are we going to Santa Monica again?" Antonio questioned, wondering why he was invited.

Gilbert shrugged, "Lovino invited his brother and Ludwig to go shopping with him. And for some reason, he implored that _I_ had to go as well. Which means he's bound to do something terrible to the_ Awesome_ me. And if he does try to do something terrible, I should have more people come along, so that I can push them in front of me when he tries slips his butterfly knife out," he concluded expertly.

"..." Francis arched a brow, "Really?"

"Plus, I thought you might want to see him Antonio," Gilbert coughed, embarrassed that he admitted his true intentions.

The Spaniard smiled brightly, and captured his friend in a tight, bear hug, "GILBERTO!~ YOU_ DO_ CARE!"

Ludwig stood at the doorway, clearing his throat rather loudly.

"Is Lovi with you?~" Antonio asked, cheerfully.

Ludwig shook his head, "He's meeting us there." Antonio's face dropped for a moment, before he realized that he would actually be seeing his little Italian.

**...**

The car ride to Santa Monica was silent, besides Feliciano's constant, 'Ve's'.

Gilbert was too nervous to talk, there was a large coil in his stomach that wouldn't come undone.

Francis nudged his friend with an elbow, "Lighten up, Gilbert. You're giving me the creeps right now."

The albino smirked, "Are you sure it's not just the effects of my_ Awesomeness_?"

"I'm pretty damn sure," The Frenchman said simply, giving his friend a deadpanned look.

Antonio was in complete bliss, as his best friend's argued, "I'm going to see Lovi today!~" He stared out the window, gaping at Venice Beach and the Santa Monica Pier that they drove by.

"Are we going to the beach too?~" The tan man asked excitedly. He really wanted to see Lovino in speedos. Oh God...speedos.

His green eyes glistened at the thought of it... _"Kya! Antonio! You're getting me all wet!~" _That would be the. Best. Day. Ever.

"Okay," Ludwig began, "We're here, and Lovino told us to meet him in front of the Forever21, so let's go."

"...What the hell? Why the hell would he ask us to meet him at Forever21? That's so unawesome! I can't be caught talking to him!" Gilbert exclaimed, throwing his arms in the air.

Francis flipped his hair with a 'humph!', "What's wrong with Forever21? I love their clothes!" The Frenchman said, sauntering out onto the sidewalk.

Ludwig sighed, "Well that's where he told him to meet us."

Feliciano nodded his head ecstatically, "I'm so happy _mi fratello _asked us to join him! Ve!~"

**Matthew**

"Why are we at Forever21? I thought this was a girl's store?" The Canadian asked, completely flushed because every girl who passed by the trio had giggled and/or smirked.

Feliks smiled, "Because their clothes are like, totally cute! Here, Mattie, try this top on, it'll look so fucking hot on you," the Polish man handed him a striped blouson top from the Women's section. The shirt was labeled: XXXXS

"I hate you so much right now Feliks," Matthew stated with a blank face.

The Polish man grinned, "Hey, I gave you those super sexy clothes, you should be _thanking_ me."

Matthew glanced at himself in a nearby mirror. He looked _good,_ wearing tight, dark jeans with a classic gray v-neck and white cotton cardigan.

A brunette woman smiled at him, "Hi," she said, "I'm Elizabeta, but you can call me Liz." Oh shit. She stepped forward, closing in on him. His body was pushed up against the mirror, as she placed a hand on Matthew's chest.

"H-Hello?" Matthew greeted meekly, blushing, "I-I'm Matthew..."

He really wanted to smack her hand away from his chest, but he didn't want to be rude to such a cute girl.

She feigned a surprised expression, "You mean Matthew Williams?" Liz cocked her head to the side.

Feliks watched from the sidelines, laughing. Elizabeta? She entered the contest? She probably joined for the fuck of it.

"Y-Yeah. How...how'd you know?" He asked, laughing robotically. Liz's hand slid down lower, stopping at his vital regions, her grip on them was hostile. Matthew screeched, his face completely flushed, "I-I...Oh my God. Please remove your hand from there!"

Her grip only tightened, she was excited that he made such a cute expression when he was absolutely mortified.

The Hungarian girl giggled, "You're pretty cute Matthew Williams," she stated with a wink, pulling out a black sharpie from a pocket in her summer dress.

"Tilt your head to the side," she demanded with an evil grin.

The Canadian complied, scared that she would suffocate his dick again. On his neck, she began scribbling down some numbers. Hard. Matthew winced at the strong scent of the marker, but didn't dare to speak a word. When she finished, she pulled Matthew's face towards hers, so that their eyes bored into each others.

"It was nice meeting you Matthew," the brunette purred, then licked Matthew's cheek before strolling out of the clothing store with a satisfied smirk.

The blond Canadian cringed when Feliks burst out laughing, making them receive weird looks from the workers.

"Shut up Feliks! Some random chick just harassed me! She_ licked_ me, and grabbed my_ balls_ for crying out loud, and you think it's funny?" This is when a burly security guard came up to the two.

"I'm going to have to ask you two to leave. There are small children here who shouldn't be hearing this sort of profanity." Who knew they had security guards at Forever21?

Feliks gasped, "I haven't even seen the Clearance section yet!"

Matthew sighed, dragging Feliks towards the exit. _I knew I should have waited with Lovino outside..._

**...**

When Feliks and Matthew went outside, the Canadian expected to see an angry Italian, not an entire group of new faces.

"Ve!~ Who's that?" Feliciano asked Lovino, pointing at the violet-eyed man.

"Matthew Williams," Lovino replied, "Matthew, this is my brother, Feliciano. And that wurst-eating blond right there is his boyfriend," he said, pointing at Ludwig. "The rest of the idiots can introduce themselves.

Francis, Antonio, and Gilbert froze at that name. Matthew Williams.

The Canadian's eyes flickered to the silverette. His crimson eyes were locked on Matthew's figure. The albino gulped.

"G-Gilbert?" Matthew asked in disbelief.

The Prussian bit his lip, looking down at the floor, before Francis elbowed his stomach harshly. "H..Hi...Mattie."

Everyone in the group glanced from Gilbert to Matthew, then back to Gilbert. Since when the hell did these two know each other?

"Oh..kaaay...well, I'm Francis, it's a pleasure to meet you, mon cher," The Frenchman said with a coy smile.

The Spaniard who was latched onto Lovino piped up, "I'm Antonio!~ Lovino's boyfriend!"

"YOU'RE NOT MY BOYFRIEND!" Lovino cried, while everyone ignored him.

"Hi," Matthew began softly, "it's nice to meet you all too." He was extremely shy in front of people he hardly knew.

Feliks rolled his eyes, "And you all know me, of course. So like, let's shop!"

**...**

Matthew's eyes would stop trailing back to Gilbert's, and apparently, the albino was the exact same way.

They both cast shy glances towards each other with each step they took, both of them unknowingly drawing closer and closer until their arms brushed up against each other. "S-Sorry!" Matthew apologized. The group was ahead of them, none of them noticing Gilbert and Matthew slip behind.

"It's nothing to apologize for," Gilbert passed him a lopsided grin, before spotting large blotches of black on the Canadian's neck. It read: '813-6900 Elizabeta', with a heart next to her name.

"That bitch," he whispered, making Matthew turn his head.

He rose an eyebrow, "_Excuse_ me?"

"Who wrote that on you?" Gilbert snapped, in a very infuriated tone, grabbing Matthew by the hand, walking faster so that they caught up with the rest of their friends.

Matthew furrowed his brows, "Gil... I-I...this girl. She just randomly came up to me...and.."

"Francis, check this out," Gilbert said, brushing away the strands of hair that covered the message on Matthew's neck.

Francis chuckled, "So she got to him before you could?" Matthew was very confused.

"So did Ivan," Lovino and Feliks commented dryly.

Gilbert's body was frozen like a statue, "I-Ivan?" Feliks nodded, laughing in a high-pitched tone.

Matthew was becoming a little irate, he felt like he was being left in the dark about something, and he didn't like it.

"What? I don't understand? What happened?"

The albino's face dropped, "Nothing," he said quietly, trying not to look at Matthew's big, watery, puppy-dog eyes.

Not long after that, Matthew and Gilbert were behind the group once more, exchanging small conversations.

**Lovino**

"Since when did they get so close?" Lovino asked, a bit weirded out that Potato-bastard Number Two had a huge thing for his friend.

Feliks shrugged, "I had no idea. But I was totally right! I _so_ knew those two would have a connection!" he gleamed, doing a tiny victory dance, that consisted of him shaking his ass around.

Francis smirked, staring at the Polish man's ass, "Hot."

Oh dear God. I just died as I typed that.

"You're right Lovi, it seems that they do seem too close. Maybe they know each other?" Antonio said with a smile, delighted that Lovino was actually allowing him to hold his hand.

Ludwig pondered for a moment, remembering something important, "Gilbert used to go to summer school during High School. Maybe they met there? He always mentioned hanging out with a blond boy."

Feliks froze, "Holy shit! Is that why Matthew always looked so happy after his extra classes?"Elation coursed through his body, "Oh my gosh...Gilbert was the crush Matthew had all throughout High School!"

Lovino's eye twitched, "Ew."

"Awuh! How cute! Gilberto is in love!~"

Francis pieced everything together, like a boss, "That's why he said he didn't want the money!" The Frenchman smiled.

"Pasta! Ve!~"

Feliks agreed with Feliciano, "Yeah! Exactly!" ...What?

"So what are we going to do about this?" Lovino asked with a sigh, already knowing that the Polish man would meddle.

Feliks grinned wickedly, "I know what _we're_ all going to do," the Polish man began, "but there are other people after Matthew, so we're going to have keep them away from him. Remember, these people are broke, stoners. They will do anything to get their hands on money."

Everyone in the group nodded, gathering around in a circle to discuss the topic, so no one would think they were crazy and psychotic street performers.

**...**

"I'm quitting the competition then, I don't want to participate. I have to help Gil," Francis said to Feliks, sounding rather brave. They acted like this was a fight for life and death. Jeeze. Seriously? All you have to do is screw the kid and go home!

"What a noble decision Francis!~" Antonio said, sobbing lightly into Lovino's shoulder.

"Get off of me Tomato-bastard!"

"Okay! So you're all in?" Feliks asked the group, and they in turn, nodded their heads with looks of determination (except Ludwig and Lovino, who looked like they wanted to kill everyone there).

The Polish man smiled, "Great! Let operation: Gilbert Steal Matthew's Virginity, begin!"

"_Si_!"

"_Oui_!"

"_Ve_!~"

Ludwig nodded.

"Whatever, bastards."

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><p><strong>AN: Okay! Done! (: REVIEW!~~~**


	4. LARS 1

**A/N: Hello children. Ready to have some fun? *biggest pedo smile ever* (: KAY! ON TO CHAPTER 4? WHUUUUT? HAHAH I ened the last chapter very stupidly. ;D Psycho Friend Protection Group: PFPG: Francis, Antonio, Feliks, Ludwig, Lovino, and Feliciano. Hey. Review please. Because I love you all so much. P.S. Matthew's 18. Gilbert's 19. Everyone else is around that age too. (: They've already graduated from HS.  
><strong>

**Disclaimer: Unf. I love. Circa Survive. I wish I owned them...But then again, I wish I owned I lot of things. Like this computer. And Hetalia. Too bad I do not.**

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><p><strong>Matthew<strong>

The Canadian was so enveloped in his conversation with the albino, that he never even realized that the rest of the group was long gone.

Neither did Gilbert, but he didn't really mind. More time alone with his favorite blond boy.

"Gilbert, I think we've lost them," Matthew began, panic laced his soft words.

Gilbert chuckled, smiling down at Matthew. He loved it when the blond got so flustered over the smallest things. It was absolutely adorable, and he loved every expression the Canadian poured out.

"You have your cell phone, right?" the albino asked.

"Yeah..."

The crimson-eyed male laughed, taking Matthew's hand in his own, "Then we'll be alright."

Matthew blushed, nodding his head.

He wondered why Gilbert was doing these things to him after what happened in their past.

There was a stinging sensation in his heart, as he retracted his hand from Gilbert's grasp.

"Why are you acting like you like me?" He interrogated, confused by the albino's actions.

Gilbert had a pained expression on his face, "I've always liked you Mattie-"

"NO! If you liked me, then you wouldn't have _rejected_ me, or _used_ me like you did," Matthew cried, making people turn their heads and glare at the pair.

The Canadian's emotions were overwhelming him.

He practically gave Gilbert his heart during high school, and in return, the albino just threw it away.

Matthew had flashbacks about when he couldn't wait to go to summer school to see that really cute albino guy he liked.

He didn't want his feelings to be demolished again. He wouldn't have it. Therefore, Matthew did what he was best at. He ran away from risk.

"Matthew!" Gilbert called out, chasing after the violet-eyed teen, "Wait!"

The Canadian looked back at Gilbert while he ran, not noticing the man who stood in his path. He collided with the tall, Dutch man with the void look on his face.

**...Oh shit. Lars. **

**Psycho Friend Protection Group: Lovino and Antonio  
><strong>

Lovino and Antonio spotted a restaurant, strolling in as their stomach's growled. The group split up after they lost Mathew and Gilbert.

Oh. You thought they got separated on _purpose_?

Well...Matthew is a hard person to see.

Or Notice.

Even when he is_ standing_ next to the most _AWESOME_ person in the _universe_.

The couple- I mean pair, walked into a Hispanic fast-food joint, since Lovino couldn't find the Italian place.

"Do you want to split a burrito or something?" Lovino asked dryly, as Antonio's face brightened.

This made Antonio's day completely, "Y-You want to split a meal? With me?~" The Spaniard asked with a blush, and a very homosexual twinkle in his eye, "_Si, mi amour_! _Te amo_!" Antonio exclaimed, glomping the small Italian, as the worker at the fast-food restaurant coughed, embarrassed.

"Oh, right," Lovino began, "We'll have a Super-mega large-grande-carne asada-with extra tomatoes-burrito, bastard."

The worker arched a brow at the Italian's insult, while Antonio whispered, "He calls everyone a bastard, don't mind it.~"

"FUCK YOU TOMATO BASTARD!" Lovino yelled, hitting his Spanish lov- friend, with his lunch tray.

"B-But Lovi!~"

**Psycho Friend Protection Group: Feliks and Francis  
><strong>

Since Feliciano cried the second he was separated from Ludwig, Feliks decided he'd just split up with Francis.

He hated the fact that the Frenchman would try to feel him up every five minutes.

"Francis... if you don't stop staring at my ass, I will like, cut your dick off," this comment made the blue-eyed man's mouth go dry, "pay attention. We need to find the two. I have a feeling that like, people from the competition like...totally know who Matthew is now that Elizabeta met him. She's not very discreet."

Francis' face paled immensely, "_Je suis désolé! _Don't chop my dick off! _S'il te plaît_!"

Feliks snorted a laugh at this. Never in his life had he seen a more desperate Francis.

"Let's just find these guys before like, anyone else does."

**...**

The two passed a few more stores. Feliks couldn't resist the H&M, Francis had to practically drag him out, but was distracted by a really cute pair of shorts. They both ended up shopping in the store for about twenty minutes, before one of the workers kicked them out for disturbing the peace.

"Psh. That bitch was just jealous of my sexiness," Francis said, sticking his nose up in the air.

The two continued their search, trying not to be distracted by all the super over-priced stores in the area. Man! Why did they have to pick Santa Monica?

Francis squinted his eyes, "Hey...that looks a lot like that one Dutch guy...What's his face?" Feliks searched around for whoever the hell Francis was talking about, but saw no one that fit the description. Not like the description was very vivid to begin with though.

The viridian-eyed killer pouted, confused, "The only Dutchman I know is Lars, and he's... right...in front of Matthew!"

After spotting who the Frenchman was talking about, Feliks instantly darted over to the other side of the street, leaving a dazed Frenchman behind.

**Gilbert**

Gilbert paused, as he watched Matthew's body collide with the giant Dutchman's.

"Matt-" The albino gasped, as Lars held onto the Canadian.

"Are you Matthew Williams?" Lars asked, in a monotonous tone. Matthew was a bit terrified at this point. How the fuck did this guy know his name?

Matthew didn't move at all. He was completely frozen, unable to speak.

Lars' face contorted completely, "Are you going to speak, or just stand there like a bitch?" the Dutchman hissed.

Gilbert growled, "Lars, leave him alone." His blood was boiling with rage. The albino dreaded the way the Dutchman spoke to his crush. It pissed him off to his very core.

Chortling, Lars straightened his back, "And what are you going to do about it? You fucking freak."

"Go sit on a dick Lars, and take a damn shower while you're at it. You fucking wreak of coke and heroin."

Matthew tried to intervene, but his quiet voice was lost in the insults that were being thrown back and forth between the two men that fought over him.

The Canadian pouted, hating the feeling of being ignored, so with the loudest voice he could muster, he yelled, "STOP IT! YOU DAMN RETARDS!"

This caused the albino to gape at him, while the Dutchman took this chance to attack the crimson-eyed male. Pain rushed to the side of Gilbert's face, as a fist clashed with his cheek, giving him a huge gash.

_Ach mein Gott! That fucking bitch! _

Lars smirked, "What? Too pussy to fight?" Gilbert launched himself at the taller blond, effectively knocking them both over to the ground, where they wrestled for dominance.

Feliks chose this time to saunter over, acting as if nothing out of the ordinary was going on. "Hey Matthew," he greeted with a smile.

"Oh my sweet holy maple! FELIKS! Do SOMETHING!" Matthew cried, not believing that his friend would just sit there and watch Gilbert fight someone. It's not like the Canadian was worried for the albino man. Psh. No way. He was so totally over (in love with) Gilbert.

Totally, and completely over (in love with) him.

Feliks sighed, "Fine, I see how it his. No 'Hi' back?"

"Hi Feliks. NOW STOP THEM BEFORE GILBERT GETS HURT!"

Feliks rolled his eyes with a coy grin, "So you_ do_ like him." Matthew's face flushed, as he screamed at Feliks to stop the two from killing each other.

The Polish man's playful face dissipated as his popped out his new, sleek, 500 Cal Magnum Pistol, swiftly moving closer to the two men fighting each other, and pressing the barrel flat against Lars' temple.

"Hello there, Lars," Feliks greeted, menacingly. Anyone who's heard Feliks' voice sound as evil, would shiver at the tone. Except Toris, 'cause he's into that kind of kinky shit. Oh yeah. He's almost as masochistic as Raivis.

Lars gulped, slowly trying to break away from Gilbert, so that the merciless killer wouldn't have the urge to shoot his brains out.

Gilbert got up as well, and quickly stood by Matthew's side, asking the blond if he was alright. To be honest, Matthew looked like he was about to burst into tears.

"I'm not alright! You could've gotten killed!" Matthew cried, as he hugged Gilbert tightly.

The albino was a bit shocked by the Canadian's sudden change in mood, but took it as a good thing, because now Matthew wasn't all pissed about what happened in their past.

Without hesitation, Gilbert wrapped his pale arms around the Canadian, embracing him tightly, not wanting to let go.

"I'm sorry Matthew..." he began, "...about everything." His embrace got tighter as he spoke his next words with sincere fortitude, "I promise, if you ever give me a chance, I won't fuck up like I did before," the albino lifted the Canadian's chin up, so that their eyes locked, "I swear I won't," he whispered sweetly, making the violet-eyed teen flush even more profusely than he was earlier.

**...**

Lost in their own little world, Matthew and Gilbert were unaware of the Polish man that was straddling the blond Dutchman. Feliks snickered poisonously, as he lowered his face and gun down to Lars', and whispered into his ear, "You hurt my friend," he began, "you made him cry," he added with a pause, slowly licking the barrel of his gun sensually, which sent a shiver down Lars' spine, "so I'll make you pay," he ended simply.

Lars gulped, when Feliks suddenly cocked his gun, and smashed the edge of the gun right in between his eyes.

I feel kind of bad for Lars.

But not really.

The Dutchman fainted before the Polish man pulled the trigger. _Damn_. He really wanted to kill someone today.

He pushed his body off of Lars' leaving his unconscious body on the pavement.

Feliks watched in awe, as he saw Matthew and Gilbert sitting on the nearest bench. Matthew's head was placed on Gilbert's shoulder, and their arms were laced together, as they both giggled at a street performer who thought he could sing.

How sweet is that?

"I can't fucking believe you were right, Feliks. You're pretty good at reading people. Match-making bastard." Lovino muttered, walking up from behind the Polish man, with half a burrito in one hand. The other hand was locked with a certain Spaniard's.

Smirking, Feliks spoke triumphantly, "Nice boyfriend."

"Fuck off."

**...**

The group decided it was time to go home, especially since they were sure they'd gotten a million parking tickets by now.

Feliciano only put a quarter in the parking meter.

They'd been 'shopping' for about four hours.

Gilbert really didn't want Matthew to part from him after they'd just reunited, but he had to.

"I'll call you tonight," Matthew said, smiling his adorable signature smile of ultimate cuteness.

Gilbert beamed, nodding his head, and giving Matthew a quick kiss on the cheek.

The Canadian blushed, as Francis whistled suggestively, then yelled, "TAKE HIS PANTS OFF!" Which made a lot of parents walking with their children angry.

Gilbert face palmed, "My friends are so fucking retarded."

"And unbelievably homo. I've never seen so many homos together at once...bastards," Lovino said, trying to make it seem like he was attempting to push Antonio off of him. "G-Get off me Tomato-bastard!"

"B-But Lovi!~"

**...**

That day: Ludwig received ten parking tickets, and giant hug from his sobbing Italian lover.

Lovino and Antonio became lovers-I mean closer friends.

Matthew and his albino reconciled, and began speaking to each other.

Feliks and Francis decided they were now shopping partners in crime.

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><p><strong>AN: I can't help but feel like this chapter was completely BS-ed. Even though I spent like four hours typing it. Major writer's block man.. ): I'm sorry if this chapter disappointed some of you. I feel like I'm losing my touch! D; So sad.. Well, I hope you liked it anyways. Oh and thank you FireBird1211**, **for giving me the sexy idea that Feliks would lick his gun~ And thank you people who reviewed! I love you all (: PLEASE continue to REVIEW. For ME! REVIEW. Please (:**

_Translations: French_

_Je suis désolé- I'm sorry!_

_S'il te plaît_- _Please! _

**I hope that's right. ._. REVIEW~**


	5. ANTONIOLOVINO 1

**A/N: Dear readers. I know this is a completely different fandom...but... HAPPY AKUROKU DAY. ;D I really should be updating the other story right now...but... I: I FAIL AS A WRITER. D;; THAT STORY IS TOO SERIOUS FOR ME. I NEED MY HETALIA CRACK. Kay, well here's chapter 5! Enjoy~**

**Disclaimer: Owning something requires papers and contracts...and other stuff that I do not have. THEREFORE: HETALIA IS NOT MINE. DAMMIT. **

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><p><strong>Lovino<br>**

While the two were at Santa Monica, eating at the Hispanic restaurant, Antonio took the opportunity to ask the Italian on a date.

At first, Lovino was flustered that the Spaniard wanted to take him out.

He knew deep down in his heart that in the end, if Antonio found out about what he really did for a living, they'd both end up completely hurt.

Lovino also knew that deep, down in his heart, the hazel-eyed Spaniard truly loved him.

He'd been pursuing the Italian for about two years now, and it was about time for him to succumb to the tall, tan sexiness, that was Antonio Fernando Carriedo.

So, in the end, he agreed to go on a date with Antonio.

**Gilbert**

Just as Matthew had promised, Gilbert received a phone call from the young Canadian that night.

"Hey Mattie," Gilbert greeted, a soft grin graced his face. He was so ecstatic that Matthew was actually talking to him.

The albino thought he'd never even get the blond to look at him after what he did.

"_**Hey Gil,**_" the blond said sweetly, beginning a conversation with the albino.

He sat down, deciding that he would watch some TV, as he talked to the blond. With the click of a button, the TV's black screen came to life.

The TV was set on the Porn channel. Excellent. There was a loud, sultry moan, coming from one of the females that was being thrusted into by two males, one on each opening of her body.

_Fucking Francis! LEAVING MY TV ON THE PORN CHANNEL!_ Gilbert growled, trying to find the button that changed the channel

Gilbert could hear Matthew's cute giggling through the line, "_**What are on Earth are you doing right now, Gil?**_"

"I swear to _Gott_! I'm not doing what you think I'm doing! It's the TV! Trust me! _Oh Jesus Christ_...EW. I DIDN'T EVEN _KNOW_ GIRLS COULD DO THAT! No, Mattie, you have to believe me! Francis came over and-"

Matthew began laughing hysterically, "_**What channel is it?**_" He asked.

Gilbert's eyes widened, and a smirk slowly began to grow, "Mattie...Do you _want_ to watch porn?"

"_**N-No! I just wanted to make that you weren't lying to me. I mean, you DO tend to do that to me,**_" The Canadian joked, but there was some hurtful truth behind his words.

"I...Mattie. I'm sorry. I really am," He apologized sincerely, trying to get Matthew to believe that he was serious this time.

The Canadian chuckled, "_**What's the damn channel Gil.**_" He wanted to make it sound like a playful question, but it came out as an icy demand. His heart stung each time they brought up their past, which pissed him off to the highest degree.

It's not like they could just move on after what Gilbert had done!

"Channel 813..." Gilbert said quietly, melancholy that the blond would probably never fully forget what he had done, and their relationship would never revert back to how it was before that _incident_ happened.

**...**

Francis and Antonio came to Gilbert's house the next day, worried for their friend. He was suppose to meet up with them last night at a bar in West Hollywood, but he didn't show up.

They knocked at his door, "Gilberto! Wake up, lazy ass!~" Antonio chimed, cheerfully. They waited about five minutes, doing nothing but knocking at his door, and shouting insults.

Groggily, the albino opened his door, "Fuck, I don't understand how you can be so loud in the morning 'Tonio..." He groaned, massaging his temples in annoyance.

"It's a gift, really!~"

Francis sighed, "Why didn't you show up last night? We were worried, _connard_," he growled, agitated that his albino friend stood them up, without so much as a phone call.

"Shit happened," Gilbert said, a melancholy expression plastered on his face.

"Matthew..." Antonio and Francis knew their friend too well.

They could read him like a fucking book.

Francis, being the completely sexy genius that his is, had a bright idea. "_Je suis génial!_ I know where I can take you!"

Gilbert sighed, "Where do you want to take me?"

Unfortunately for the Frenchman, he had forgotten that he was banned from the club that he really wanted to take his friend to. He drugged the owner of the club (ON ACCIDENT), and was put on the club's Black List.

"Nevermind..."

"Amigo, how about you just call him again? Maybe you guys will have a better conversation?" Antonio suggested.

Gilbert scrunched his eyebrows together, "How did you know I fought with Mattie?"

"You're really not that difficult to read," His friends stated honestly.

But nonetheless, Gilbert kicked Francis and Antonio out of his house, and called Matthew once more.

**...**

"Matthew?" Gilbert asked desperately, as he talked into the phone.

The blond took a while to respond, "**_Yeah Gilbert?_**" he sounded a bit worried. Usually the albino's voice was filled with confidence, but now his voice sounded like he was a lost child.

"I know I fucked up in the past-" he began, but was cut off by the Canadian.

"_**Gil. It's fine. I understand that you're sorry. I...I just want us to be normal again...and I'm sorry for earlier. I didn't mean to say that so harshly..." **_

The albino smiled, "Thanks for giving me a second chance," his small smile suddenly grew large and arrogant, "but then again, I'm awesome. Who wuldn't want to give me a second chance?"

That bitch just never learns!

**Antonio**

Antonio was quite shocked when Lovino was the one to call him, and ask him what time he'd be picking the Italian up.

He didn't know what to say.

Of course he'd go to pick Lovino up, but he was just... completely overwhelmed with happiness that Lovino actually took him seriously!

Usually, when Antonio asked him out, he'd laugh at him, or pelt him with tomatoes!

"I-I'll be there in ten minutes!~"

Lovino snorted, "**_If you're late, I'll kill you. Tomato-bastard**!**_**" He hung up, leaving a rapturous Spaniard to dial tone.

_Oh dios mio! Lovino...actually...This is the greatest day of my life!~_

Antonio raced out of his humble home, and into his car.

**...**

After he had picked up Lovino, right on time, they drove down to Lovino's favorite Italian restaurant.

Olive Garden!

"Why the fuck did you take me to Olive Garden? You bastard! If you're trying to make a mockery of my culture, you better fucking be prepared to have your balls castrat-"

The Italian stopped, and stared in at the was Antonio sensually stuck a long, golden, breadstick into his mouth. He hummed, as he pushed the entire breadstick in. "What was that Lovi?" He asked, after chewing the baked, doughy goodness that practically melted in his mouth.

"...Give me one of those," he demanded.

**...**

Antonio began talking about his life at work, and everything that wasn't classified and vital information.

Like the drama that was happening at headquarters, and which superiors were sleeping with which secretaries.

All that bullshit adults like to talk about, y'know?

The strange thing was, Lovino didn't throw one insult at him, or tell him to shut up.

This made the Spaniard panic slightly.

And by slightly, you know that I mean: In the worst way.

"Lovino, did I do something to upset you? _Lo siento_! I promise on my life I will never do anything idiotic like that again! But first you have to tell me what I did wrong!" taking Lovino's hands, he kissed them gently, before begging, Please don't hate me!

The Italian blushed, on the verge of laughing, "What the fuck? There's nothing wrong. Or at least I don't think there's anything wrong," he said simply, trying to scowl at the Spaniard, but failed completely, letting out a tiny giggle.

It was a very_ manly_ giggle, so shut up.

"Y-You're not mad? But...you weren't insulting me like you normally do," Antonio reasoned.

He did not even realized that Lovino hadn't complained about him holding or kissing his hands.

Lovino averted his eyes, "There's nothing to insult...except the fact that you're a Tomato-loving bastard, but as for the date, it's actually," he paused, wondering if he'd regret his words, but decided he wouldn't, "nice."

Beaming with absolute elation, the Spaniard's cheeks were tinged pink, "Lovino...don't say cute things like that. You have no idea how much I want to jump you right now," he admitted, not even caring if families around him could hear.

"A-Antonio, i-it's not cute, it's the truth. I actually liked it," he said with a stern pout.

_Not good. Not good at all. I really want to bring him home with me. Oh shit. Not good._

"Ah, well, I'm glad you are enjoying it," he stated nervously.

**...**

After finishing and paying for the meal, Antonio escorted Lovino to his silver Lotus Elise.

His car was fucking beautiful.

Opening the passenger door for Lovino, the Spaniard couldn't help but feel embarrassed.

Oh how he wished Lovino were his boyfriend.

How he dreamed to hold the small, frail (MAFIA BOSS) in his arms through the night.

The drive to Lovino's house was long, and filled with small conversing here and there, mostly on Antonio's part, but he didn't mind.

Lovino hadn't thrown any insults at him at all. He was actually calling the Spaniard by his name.

It felt kind of...amazing.

The way his voice purred out his name almost drove him to insanity.

The good kind of insanity though.

Not the kind that makes you end up in hospitals.

"By the way, Lovino, I've been talking about my job and my life. How's your job?" he asked, turning his head to look at the brunette.

The Italian froze, "I...I uh. It's great. Just...um... got a promotion. Yeah. A promotion."

Antonio passed Lovino a sunny smile, "_Really_? That's great! What do you do for a living?"

"S-Store. Yeah, I um... work in a store. I'm a m-manager," he lied through his teeth.

They arrived at Lovino's house. Well... Lovino didn't really have a house. His house was more like a mansion.

Wonder when he saved up all that_ money_ from working at a store. Hmmmm.

"I wonder what kind of store you work at. Must be a really great store to be paying for this place, huh?~" Antonio asked naively.

Lovino gulped, then laughed fakely, "Ha...ha... y-yeah.."

"Oh, let me get the door for you!" The Spaniard shot out of the car, and quickly made his way to the other side of the car.

Lovino stepped out of the car, "You don't have to walk me up there," he gestured to his long entry way that led up to the doors of his house.

"Yes I do. C'mon," Antonio took his hand gently, and walked him up to his door, treasuring every moment he had left with the Italian.

**...**

Lovino stared at Antonio awkwardly when they got to the doorway. "U-Um..so tonight was g-great," Lovino stuttered with a blush.**  
><strong>

"Y-Yeah it really was, haha," Antonio added nervously._  
><em>

_Do I kiss him? _

His eyes became a bit hazier, as he moved closer to the Italian, winding his arms around Lovino's small frame.

The hazelnut-haired man didn't protest, only tip-toeing to reach the Spaniard's mouth.

Antonio pressed his soft lips against Lovino's, wishing he could deepen the kiss.

They moaned against each other, as Antonio pushed the Italian's back against the door.

Antonio slid his tongue inside Lovino's, receiving a low moan in return.

When they broke apart, and Lovino reluctantly let out a whine.

"W-Will I be able to take you out again?" Antonio asked, gathering himself together.

Lovino blushed, "Of course, bastard! You really think after what just happened I'd let you leave me? F-Fuck! T-Take some responsibility!"

With that, Antonio captured the Italian in another, more passionate, lip-lock.**  
><strong>

**Feliks  
><strong>

The blond walked into work looking extremely happy the next day, which in turn made Feliks act like the best friend who won't ever shut up and meddle in your personal life.

Wait.

Feliks was always like that.

"Someone's looking a bit more that happy," Lovino stated, arching a brow at Matthew. The Canadian paused, then smiled at his boss, greeting him a good morning.

"Well, Gilbert and Matthew have been talking for about like, a week now. I'm glad Matthew's found someone that treats him totally well."

Though the Polish man couldn't help but wonder why they stopped talking before to begin with.

With a scoff, Lovino muttered under his breath, "Fucking Potato-bastard number two."

He crossed his arms, "Why does Matthew have to like the most obnoxious one? I mean seriously! That albino bastard is such a... BASTARD!"

Feliks shrugged, walking off to the storage room to help Matthew with unpacking new sex toys.

...

The viridian-eyed man's curiosity got the better of him. He decided he was going to ask Matthew what happened last summer, before the two teens parted.

"Hey Matthew, I was just like, wondering..." Feliks began reluctantly, trying to avoid eye contact with his friend. He didn't want to set Matthew off. He knew that some things in Matthew's past, trigger terrible, horrible memories.

Basically, the Canadian teen was a bomb. If you cut the wrong wire, the entire thing would explode. And I do not believe, young readers, you'd want Matthew to explode.

"Yeah, what's up Feliks?" Matthew asked, not really interested in Feliks' conversation.

"I-I..." _C'mon Feliks! You're a hitman for fuck's sake! You can ask him one, measly question! _"I...was wondering... why you and G-" Feliks was cut off by a shriek coming from Lovino at the front desk. Matthew and Feliks glanced at each other, then ran to see what happened.

"What happened Boss?" Matthew asked, trying to calm his Italian friend down.

Lovino's face was a mix of blue and purple, "I-I saw A-Antonio's car park outside! Why the h-hell... FUCK THIS ISN'T GOOD!"

"What's wrong with that?" The Canadian asked, annoyed. Well, he was annoyed, until he saw that his best friend was terrified by this information as well.

"He doesn't know Lovino owns this sex shop. He also doesn't know that Lovino's the Mafia Boss!"

Matthew was taken back by this information, "...What the fuck? Are you guys serious? I'm not going to fall for a stupid prank like that."

Lovino's face darkened immensely, as he pulled Matthew by the collar, "This isn't a joke, Maple-bastard! Antonio seriously doesn't know this information. He's from the fucking FBI! Fuck! I don't have time for this!"

The Italian sighed, his eyes clouded with unshed tear, "He's going to hate me if he finds out..."

The violet-eyed worker bit his bottom lip, "I'll stall him. You guys do whatever if you have to do in your back office. Hide all the evidence," Matthew began, making himself look as un-suspicious as possible.

"_Grazie_, Matteo," Lovino thanked his friend with a soft voice, then rushed to his office to rid of all the drugs and guns he had laying around.

Matthew was expecting Antonio to come in, but he wasn't expecting the entire trio.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: that was chapter 5!~ (: YEEEHEEEE The entire time I was writing the part where Lovino and Antonio were driving back to Lovino's house..The song: 'She Will Be Loved' played over and over in my head... ._. I DON'T EVEN LISTEN TO MAROON FIVE! I know...I know what you're thinking...**

**"JAYLEEN! THIS IS A FUCKING PRUCAN STORY! WHY IS THERE MORE SPAMANO! AND WHERE THE HELL IS THE SUFIN AND THE FRUK! OR THE OTHER PAIRING FOR THAT MATTER!"**

**A) Don't shoot me.**

**B) I like Spamano.**

**C) I'M WORKING ON THE PRUCAN AND OTHER PAIRINGS! PLEASE BE PATIENT! D;;;;;  
><strong>

Translation: _Je suis_ _génial!_- I'm brilliant!


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Chapter 6, huh? (: I try my best to update daily, JUST. FOR. YOU. :D ERF. I hope you guys enjoy today's chapter!OH GAWD, I STAYED UP ALL NIGHT READING AKUROKU FOR AKUROKU DAY! IT...WAS...BEAUTIFUL.. (; P.S. For those of you who don't know, Manhattan Beach is a beach in LA!~  
><strong>

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia! **

* * *

><p><strong>Gilbert<strong>

Once again, the Bad Touch Trio had invaded Gilbert's house, purposely turning the porn channel on (Francis) and raiding Gilbert's pantry in search of tomatoes (Antonio).

"Where did you say we were going to go?" Gilbert asked his French friend, wondering why Francis wanted to drag him along somewhere.

Francis sighed, "Well the sex shop I normally go to recently closed down, and yesterday, I saw this really legit-looking place a couple of miles away from Manhattan Beach," he said simply

"You want to take us to a sex shop?" Antonio commented dryly, a perfectly ripe tomato in his hand. When did he even find that?

Gilbert groaned, "I don't want to go anymore!" he whined, plopping down onto his junkyard of a couch.

"Too bad. Let's go _mes amis_!" Francis exclaimed happily, knowing that he would have his way in the end.

Antonio and Gilbert hesitantly trailed after their favorite pervert.

**...**

"_Piacere Colpevole._..?" Gilbert tried sounding out the Italian name.

Antonio's eyes trailed to the humble sign across the top of the building, "_Si_ Gilbert!~" he smiled, "It means _Guilty Pleasure_."

Francis' eyes shined deviously, "Ohonhonhon! I hope this place has more variety of sex toys this time. The other shop was a bit small, but this place looks ginormous!"

The albino turned his head, narrowing his eyes at the Frenchman, "...Seriously? What the fuck Francis! You're such a sick freak!"

Francis shrugged his shoulders, not really caring, and said something along the lines of, 'Don't hate me 'cause you ain't me, homie gee.'

"..."Gilbert only shook his head, trying to erase what had been said out of his mind, "Francis, you're fucking retarded."

Antonio's mouth twitched, before he roared out in laughter.

**...**

The Spaniard parked his silver Lotus Elise behind the building.

His car...oh God, I'd marry his car. It was. So beautiful, just shining in the sun's light, letting waves of heat hit it's professional silver paint.

Okay, I'm done drooling over cars.

The trio walked over to the building, ignoring all the looks they were getting from people who were headed towards the beach. A group of girls stared at them lustfully, one of them blushing profusely when Francis blew her a kiss.

Everyone gaped at the three gorgeous men that were headed towards the sex shop, all of them asking themselves why three models were going in a place like that.

No one knew, but it surely was a turn on.

**Matthew**

_Baiser! Oh goodness, Lord. They're coming in. Mon dieu! I'm going to die. I'm going to die if they find out I work here. Merde! _

Matthew crouched down low behind the counter, hearing the bell attached to the door, chime.

"Elloo?" Matthew could tell this was Francis that was calling out, since the accent he had was thick, and French.

Antonio was pacing around the room, nervously, "I think they're in the back room, I'll go check." His quick, light footsteps clicked slightly on the floor with each step he took.

Matthew shot up from his hiding spot, "NO! You can't go there!"

"Matteo? W-What are you d-doing here?" Antonio asked, pointing at his name tag, and work uniform.

Which had the name of the store in cursive letters at the very top-right area of his shirt.

He had to fucking choose _today_ to wear his uniform.

Matthew stuttered, blushing, "I...I ...work here," he admitted with a sigh. The Canadian was such a sweetheart.

He'd do anything to ensure his friend's happiness, even stand through complete mortification.

Gilbert was shocked, as he stared at the blond with wide eyes, his jaw hanging, while his mouth was opened, "MATTIE! That's so fucking cool! I didn't know you had the guts to work at this kinky place!" He exclaimed, excited that his current love-interest was a closet pervert, "You little pervert, you!"

The Canadian blushed harder, "I'm not a p-pervert! This job just...pays really well. Plus my friends work h-here too!"

"Really? Which friends?" Antonio and Gilbert asked, curiously, as Francis ignored everyone, salivating over the hundreds of sex toy selections.

That was...a disturbing image.

"Uh...Uhmm... I...forgot?" Matthew didn't know what to say.

The albino and the Spaniard were confused, both of them arching their brows.

Feliks chose this time to come of of the closet- I mean office room, "Oh, like, hey guys! Totally didn't expect you all to be here," the Polish man smiled sweetly, trying not to seem too fake. Speaking of Feliks...

I bet you're all wondering: How come Feliks was never arrested if he pulled out his gun in front of Antonio and whatnot?

Let's just say, Feliks is a fucking _BEAST_ at not getting caught, and the government owes him a _large_ sum of money.

Case closed.

"Feliks? You work here _too_? What the fuck! Let _me_ work here!" Gilbert laughed, obviously oblivious to the situation.

He had no clue that Matthew and Feliks were scared shitless of the idea that all three of these men were in the shop.

Well, they didn't mind Francis being here, because if they bribed the Frenchmen well enough with _free_ sex toys, he'd keep his mouth shut.

"Ha..ha.." Matthew laughed nervously, "Ha..yeah."

The Spaniard's expression grew serious, as he became skeptical about the store he was in. Gilbert passed Matthew a lopsided smile, "I'll let you two get back to work then," he smiled, winking at the Canadian.

Matthew couldn't help but feel a bit guilty.

Gilbert only made his heart race fast, but all the Canadian was doing was worrying the albino.

Feliks nudged him, narrowing his eyes slightly, he whispered, "Matthew, you're like, totally blowing our cover."

"S-Sorry..."

The viridian-eyed man let out an exasperated sigh, "It's alright, just...try not to talk to Antonio. I can tell he's suspecting something," he began, "he may look like a carefree, Spanish idiot, but he's a lot sharper than he seems."

Matthew nodded, "Got it," they spoke in low tones, as they organized the DVD section in alphabetical order.

**...**

The trio walked around the shop for about thirty minutes.

Francis was the only one with items to purchase.

He had a basket filled with condoms, a hot pink dildo, lube, and a rabbit vibrator.

Beautiful.

Feliks left to the storage room the moment he had seen Francis' eyes light up as the Frenchman sauntered over to the counter.

"W-Will this be all, Francis?" Matthew stuttered, embarrassed. Usually, Feliks would be the one to ring people up, because of the fact that every time someone bought items from the store, he'd turn into a stuttering mess of goop.

Francis wore a conciliated smirk, "_Oui_, this will be all," the blue-eyed blond halted, making his statement a bit more dramatic, "_mon cher_."

Matthew blushed, with a tiny glare, "_S'il te plaît arrêter__ de me parle en français_," Francis looked shocked to hear the younger blond speak his language, "_et d'agir comme__ je ne sais pas __ce que vous dites,_" he finished.

"Huh...I wasn't expecting that. Are you from France?"

"Quebec," Matthew corrected, scanning the items.

The Frenchman made an 'o' shape with his mouth, suggestively wiggling his eyebrows at Gilbert, who only blushed at how sexy Matthew sounded when he spoke the foreign language.

"Okay, so your total would be $138.69, please," Matthew stated, bagging all of the items.

Francis was pretty wealthy. Mostly because of his family, but his financing business was doing pretty well too. He pulled out a hundred dollar bill, and a fifty, placing the money on the counter, as he began a conversation with his friends cheerfully.

To be honest, all three of them came from families with money.

They'd been spoiled rotten their entire lives.

Matthew felt a bit envious that the Frenchman could just spend his money on whatever he felt like.

"Thank you. Hope to see you soon," Matthew said the line Feliks was suppose to say, as he handed Francis the bag.

Antonio and Francis began walking out, but Gilbert stayed behind, "So, Mattie. This Friday. You and me. Date?" He beamed at the blond, who in turn, blushed like a bride.

"S-Sure...!" Matthew exclaimed, caught off guard by the albino's sudden decision.

The crimson-eyed man's smile was still in place, "Cool. I'll call you for the details," he flipped his friends off, because they were whistling at him.

"Bye Mattie," he whispered, giving Matthew a quick, chaste, kiss on the lips.

Matthew hadn't gotten a word in at all, but whispered 'Bye Gil', as the albino ran out the door, trying to catch up with Antonio and Francis before they left him there, stranded.

**...**

"Well that went pretty well," Feliks stated, walking back to the counter, standing next to his blushing friend.

Matthew nodded his head slowly, "Y-Yeah... It did."

Lovino popped out from his office, "Are they gone?"

Feliks nodded, "Yeah boss, they're gone."

The Italian sighed, "Thank you bastards. I'm glad Antonio didn't come into my office. I heard everything..." he shuttered, thinking about what would happen if Antonio really had checked inside his secret shelter.

Chuckling lightly, the Canadian's confidence rose, "That was all me," he said, blowing on his finger nails cockily.

"PSHH! Yeah, says the guy who almost blew our cover!" the Polish man laughed, "And what was that ending about? EL OH EL, BROSKI. Like seriously. Gilbert had you eating out of the palm of his hand! You were like a little love-struck school girl!"

Lovino had to laugh with Feliks at that, since the viridian-eyed monsters was mostly correct.

"S-So? He was so embarrassing! He kissed me all of the sudden, and Francis kept being all...weird! Gah! Did you see how much shit he bought? That was a lot of stuff. I wonder why he needed that," Matthew commented, trying to change the subject.

Thankfully, Feliks was dense at times, "You don't know? Francis is like, the King of the Perverts. He's got at least twenty bookshelves if erotica in his bedroom!"

"Feliks, how the fuck do you know this shit?" Lovino asked, awed that the Polish man had so much information on the Frenchman.

Green eyes shined, "I know many things, about many people," he spoke, "it happens when you're an undercover contract killer, y'know?"

"... So about this mafia thing?" Matthew asked Lovino, completely neglecting his friendly hitman.

Lovino coughed, "It runs in the family. But since my brother is a complete pansy, my grandfather handed me this store and the title of the Mafia Boss, and gave Feli the restaurant."

Feliks nodded, interrupting the conversation, "Yeah. And Antonio has been searching for the Mafia Boss for some time now. It's been how long? Eleven months?" Feliks asked, as the Italian nodded, "Eleven months. Antonio is in charge of the Mafia-Drug Lord case, and he's pretty persistent."

"Wow...Lovino. You're in a forbidden love!" Matthew divulged, excited that something like this was actually happening in real life.

Wow, it was like, his dream come true!

He was going to live life on the edge!

Feliks gaped at him, before bursting out with laughter.

Lovino paled, stuttering out a response to Matthew's sudden elation, "C-Call it that again, and I-I'll...I'll h-have my m-mafia come after you! O-Or something."

Matthew smiled, used to the way Lovino was speaking, "Okay Boss, anything you say!" He was clueless about the fact that the Italian was entirely serious when he said that.

**Antonio**

Ever since the Spaniard had left the shop, he was nothing but suspicious.

Why had Matthew acted so weird?

Feliks would not work there if he was already working as a Hitman.

There was something completely fishy about the whole situation.

He had to look into this.

It could lead to something way more serious.

But first, he had to call Lovi, because the moody Italian always knew how to boost his spirits!

**...**

"_**What do you want Tomato- bastard? I'm busy,**_" Lovino said with a sigh.

"I just wanted to tell you that I saw your friends today!~" Antonio chimed in return, ready to tell Lovino what he had thought about the shop.

Lovino seemed like he had a bubble of air in his throat, "**_O-Oh did you now?_**"

"Yeah, they work at a sex shop near Manhattan Beach," Antonio began, deciding he was hungry as he walked into the kitchen.

He pulled a tomato out from his fridge.

"_**Wow... I had no idea. Um... so about our...n-next d-date!**_" Lovino thought about the subject quickly, hoping to get the Spaniard's mind off of the shop.

Antonio's face brightened, "OH MY GOSH! Oh yes, yes! Our next date! Well, I heard Gilbert just asked Matthew on a date today. Would you want to go on a double date with them?"

"_**A double date...? With Potato-bastard number two? And Matthew...?**_" He asked, unsure for a moment.

"W-We don't have to... if you don't want to..."

Lovino scoffed, "_**Bitch, I never said I didn't want to. I'll go. Just for the hell of it though. N-Not like I'd ever want to go a-anywhere w-with you Antonio!**_"

The Spaniard laughed, "All right Lovi, I'll call you tomorrow and tell you the details."

"_**Whatever, bye Antonio**_."

The green-eyed man was happy that the Italian wasn't insulting him as much, it was great!

Though the naive FBI agent still couldn't help but wonder what exactly was going on in that place.

He was going to investigate.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Chapter 6 for you. Um... I may not update as frequently anymore due to family issues. :\ NOTICE I SAID MAY. So there is a possibility I will, and there is a possibility that I won't. Thank you for reading though! Review please!~ Your reviews make my day! (:**

**_Oh God...I know I failed at these translations, so forgive me. ): Oh GOODNESS. I went an re-red the chapter, and fixed my spelling mistakes. Sorry about that!  
><em>**

Translation:French

_S'il te plaît arrêter__ de me parler en français_- Please stop speaking to me in French

_d'agir comme__ je ne sais pas __ce que vous dites_- and acting like you don't understand.


	7. FRANCISARTHUR 1

**A/N: Hurhur. I listened to Dance Gavin Dance, Atreyu, the Acacia Strain and Circa Survive while I wrote this. I was oh-so distracted.. I'm sorry please forgive me. ;A; I love you all.  
><strong>

**Disclaimer:I. DO. NOT. OWN. HETALIA. OR SPONGEBOB. DON'T SUE ME.  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Wednesday: Gilbert<strong>

The albino danced across his kitchen, turning his iPod to full blast.

He screamed his favorite part of the song he was listening to, "_Look how pretty she is!_" Francis gaped at his friend, annoyed that he was spewing out the shit the Gilbert called, 'music', "_When she falls down! Now there's not beauty in...bleeding mascara! Lips are quivering, like a withering rose... She's back again!_"

"You have a horrible taste in music," Francis commented dryly.

Turning his iPod off, and throwing it somewhere on the counter, the albino strolled over to his friend.

Gilbert pouted, "You're just jealous of my beautiful, melodious voice." Gilbert parked his ass on the couch, with two cold beer in his hand, handing one to Francis, "Why are you always watching the porn channel?"

"Because it's the only channel that _isn't_ free, and I love pissing you off."

The albino narrowed his eyes, "You really need to get a lover or some shit."

"The world is my lover," he stated dreamily, licking his lips when the man on the television thrusted into the smaller man.

Oh, it was the gay porn marathon?

"Francis, I worry for you," the crimson-eyed man began with a sigh, ignoring his friend's protests, and grabbing the remote, instantly flipping the channel to an old Spongebob re-run.

"Oi! _What_? Why _Spongebob_?" the Frenchman asked, as Gilbert pointed at the TV, laughing hysterically.

Gilbert popped his beer open, taking a gulp, "Ah, because Patrick is sexy."

Francis' groaned, "I wish Antonio were here to comment on your stupidity," he sighed, "why does he have to work so much?"

The albino shrugged, "I derno. He'd probably say something like," Gilbert cleared his throat, "'Oh Gilberto! You're so weird!~ Tomatoes!~' Or something like that," he mimicked Antonio's Spanish accent.

**...**

"I need to bone something," Francis stated, after a few minutes of silence between the two, and the cartoon that was playing on the TV.

Gilbert scooted away from him.

The Frenchman passed him a look of disgust, "EW! Not you." He laughed, "Let's go somewhere. I'm bored of your house."

"Okay, I have to go grocery shopping anyways," Gilbert said, finishing his beer with a few gulps.

It was amazing how many beers this guy could take!

**...**

"Let me see your shopping list," Francis commanded, stretching his hand out to take the list from Gilbert's hand.

The Frenchman read aloud, "Beer and Wurst."

"..." Francis cocked his head to the side, "Is that seriously all you need?"

"Yup."

His blue eyes sparkled, "I'm going to make you food today. Real food. The French way."

"Kay," Gilbert said, drowning out Francis words, and heading straight towards the Alcohol aisle section.

Francis shook his head, heading towards the Fresh Produce area.

**...**

"Oranges..." Francis pulled a bag from one of the bad container things... yeah.

Checking the fruit to see if it was ripe, he reached down, just as another hand reached for it as well.

He gasped, retracting his hand, and looked up to see who the pale hand belonged to.

"Hello, Arthur," Francis' voice was sugar-coated, hiding his loath for the blond next to him.

Arthur's mouth twitched, "F-Frog..." he 'greeted' murderously.

"Hmm... you're always so classy," Francis gestured to Arthur's baggy sweater and sweatpants.

The Brit blushed, trying to stutter out a reply, but ended up shaking his head, "If you're just going to insult me, I'll leave. It was n-nice seeing you again, F-Francis."

Arthur hurried out of the store, avoiding people in the store, offering his free food samples.

The Frenchman was utterly confused.

Usually the Brit would throw insults at him, and they would argue for days. But this time, Arthur just dropped it.

Like it was nothing!

He sighed, wondering if there was something wrong with the thickly-eyebrowed man.

**...**

Worried for his friend, Gilbert passed quick glances at his friend during the car ride back to his house.

"Are you okay?" he asked accusingly, "You've been quiet since we left the store."

Francis was lost in his own thoughts about the Brit. His mind was completely clouded by the Englishman, and he didn't know why exactly.

"Drop me off at the French market," Francis demanded. Gilbert stared at his completely serious face, before nodding.

**...**

"Are you going to call me when you want me to pick you up?" The albino asked.

Francis hadn't even glanced back at the crimson-eyed man as he answered, "I'll call a cab."

Gilbert stared in shock at his usually overly affectionate friend turned into a cold, icy monster before his very eyes.

_Did I do something wrong? _He shrugged, _Eh. He's probably PMSing. _

**Francis**

At first, the blond Frenchman wanted to make a dinner for his albino friend, but now, he had an even better idea. After being dropped off at the French Market, he shopped for about an hour, finding the right ingredients to make the perfect romantic dinner.

You know who he's going to have the romantic dinner with.

Gilbert.

No just kidding.

A certain British guy.

With really thick eyebrows.

Yeah.

**...**

The second Francis arrived at his house, he picked up his phone, and dialed Arthur's number.

"_**Hello, Arthur Kirkland speaking,**_" the Brit's voice sent a shiver down the Frenchman's spine.

He hesitated to answer, "H-Hi Arthur..."

The Englishman paused, "_**Francis?**_"

"Come to my house. Now," he demanded with a shaky voice.

Arthur didn't know how to react to this, "_**Are you feeling okay?**_"

"Mon lapin, _please_, come to my house."

The Brit muttered a shy 'okay', before hanging up the phone.

Francis had set out the ingredients in front of him for Duck A L'Orange:

_**1/4 cups of granulated sugar  
><strong>_

_** 2 tablespoons of water**_

_** 2 tablespoons of sherry vinegar **_

_**1 1/2 cups of orange juice **_

_**2 tablespoons of shallots, minced **_

_**1 1/2 cups of chicken stock **_

_**4 oranges, sections out from membranes**_

_** 2 duck breasts, seasoned with salt and pepper **_

_**1/4 cup of unsalted butter**_

_** 2 tablespoons of orange zest.**_

As perfect as everything was, Francis was still nervous as hell.

He tapped his foot nervously against the floor, his eye twitching rapidly as he took a couple sips from his wine glass.

_Everything is fine. I don't like Arthur Kirkland. I don't like Arthur Kirkland. Please stop thinking you like Arthur Kirkland. Oh mon dieu. His eyebrows will eat me! _

_I don't like Arthur Kirkland._

The Frenchman was desperate, this is why he was thinking strangely about the Brit.

Exactly!

There was no other explanation.

The blond, blue-eyed man was just desperate.

He was going to get laid tonight, and afterwards, completely forget about the Englishman. Completely.

**_Knock. Knock. _**

He held his breath in, as his heart started beating a bit faster. _Arthur! He's here! Oh God... _

The Frenchman took a long, deep, breath. He had his good clothes on, with his seductive smile in its rightful place.

Opening the door, "Why hello there, Arthur-" His eye began to twitch once more.

"Like, why is your eye moving like that and stuff?"

"FELIKS! LOVINO? ...What's your name again?" Francis was shocked to see the three familiar faces.

Matthew sighed, "I'm Matthew. Gilbert wanted us to check on you, since we were around this area."

"Fucking Potato-bastard! Ordering you around like that," Lovino scoffed, "Fuck, look at him. He's fine. Can we go now?"

Francis was about to say something, when he saw Arthur's car coming close to his driveway.

"O-Oh merde! C-Can you guys leave? Please? I have someone here that I need to impress, and if he sees you here, he'll think I'm some sort of pervert or something."

"But you are a pervert, bastard."

"...That's not the point," Francis muttered, pulling the three of them inside his giant house, "Go hide in one of the rooms or something! And don't come out until he leaves!"

Feliks, Matthew, and Lovino gave him a questioning glance, before running inside, giggling like a bunch of little girls who were about to witness gay sex for the first time.

**...**

"Hey there," Francis greeted with a smile, as Arthur got out from his car, walking towards the Frenchman.

Arthur furrowed his thick brows together, "Why did you invite me here? I thought you hated me?"

This confused Francis as well.

He honestly didn't understand why he had invited the Brit.

Out of impulse perhaps?

Maybe not.

When Arthur had backed down earlier at the grocery store, he couldn't help but notice how cute the Englishman looked in simple, non-work clothes.

He wanted to see more of him, but of course, the Frenchman would never admit that to himself.

"I...I just wanted to have an elegant dinner with you. To put aside our differences and be friends," Francis stated.

Stunned, Arthur took a minute to compose himself, then grinned shyly, "I'd actually like that a lot."

Francis' sky blue eyes were locked on the Brit, as his heart began thumping loudly. _Why does it feel so weird to look at him all of the sudden?_

He led Arthur into his house, already knowing that the food wasn't prepared just yet.

"So is the food ready now?" Arthur asked, enchanted by the smell that lingered through Francis' house.

Francis shook his head, "No it is not."

"Are you just going to let it burn?"

"A true cook knows exactly when his food is ready. He only relies on true expertise and his instincts," Francis explained, not noticing the paling face of his guest.

"Ah..I see."

Francis caught his tone of voice, placing a light hand on the Brit's shoulder. "Don't worry, _mon cher_," he whispered huskily, "I'll teach you _everything_ you need to know."

Arthur blushed at the Frenchman's proximity, "Teach me,_ please_," he said back to the Frenchman, who only smiled coyly.

**FML (Feliks, Matthew, and Lovino)**

Feliks peeked out from his hiding spot, trying not to barf out in pure disgust. "I think I'm like, going to pass out," he muttered, trying not to gag.

The Canadian giggled, "I think they're pretty cute together," Matthew said in a whisper.

Somewhere along the way, Lovino found a tomato, and began munching on it contently, "When they start fucking, I'm outta here."**  
><strong>

Feliks was turning a shade of purple, "Please, Lovino...don't even say such things... I'm about to burst," the Polish man covered his mouth with his hands.

**Francis**

"Oh God! Francis it's so hot!"

"Don't worry, we're almost finished Arthur... right there. Yeah...just like that..."

"S-Shit... Ah! Francis! It's o-overflowing!"

"Oh jeeze..it got all over the place...man. Now I'm going to be all sticky."

Arthur hurried his pace, "Fuck...Francis! You said this wouldn't be hard!"

The Frenchman shook his head laughing, staring down at the meal the two had burnt. "Well, I didn't know you'd screw it up so bad!_ Ta greuler_!" Francis laughed loudly, making Arthur chuckle along with him.

Arthur paused, staring at the Frenchman, "You know Francis, you're actually a pretty nice person."

The pounding of the Frenchman's heart never stopped, as he swallowed his words, "And I was never a nice person before?"

Arthur bit his lip, as Francis moved towards him, wrapping his arms around the Englishman's waist. Arthur placed both of his hands on Francis' chest, making a poor attempt to push the Frenchman away.

"I..I...Never said that," Arthur began, glancing at Francis' lips, "It's just that...we've never-"

The thickly-eyebrowed man was cut off by Francis' lips pressed up against his.

Pinning him against his kitchen wall, Francis moaned, deepening the kiss between the two.

**FML (Feliks, Matthew, and Lovino)**

Meanwhile, Feliks Polish man accidentally caught a glimpse of the couple that was making out...and the poor guy just.. fainted.

I guess it was too much for him to handle.

Lovino grunted in revulsion, "Can we leave now?"

The Canadian's eyes were almost blinded by the sight. He took back _everything_ he said about them being cute.

Carrying Feliks' unconscious body, Lovino and Matthew strolled out of the house, making as much noise as possible to interrupt the couple that was making out.

Too bad nothing could distract Francis when he had someone 'in the zone'.

**...**

"So let's just make this clear," Feliks began, holding an icepack to a giant bump, "we NEVER speak of what we saw today, EVER again."

I bet you're wondering why Feliks had a giant bump on his head. Well, let;s just say, Lovino dropped the tomato he was holding, while carrying Feliks, so he bent down to pick it up, thus causing him to drop Feliks' upper body on the pavement.

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><p><strong>AN: ...This chapter sucks balls. Hard. The only thing I like about it, is the recipe that my friend FoulsanityInstalledAwfully. I love you :) Like, this was so long for me to type, but it really...Oh my God. It's just horrible. P.S, The song Gilbert was singing in the beginning was '_Black Mascara_' by Atreyu. Once again, sorry for this horrible update :\ Please review. **


	8. IVAN 2 PART 1? WHAT

**A/N: What the hell? Somehow, I'm listening to Nicki Manaj... ._. WTF. IS. THIS? Okay, now I really need to know, what the hell does 'Mack' mean? Like, is she talking about McDonalds? -_- Oh mainstream music... OKAY! I'm done spazzing out. Well here's chapter 8 (:**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia. Or McDonald's. Or Nicki Manaj. (: DON'T SUE ME PLZ.**

* * *

><p><strong>Gilbert<strong>

Okay, Gilbert was extremely worried at this point. Matthew wasn't answering his phone.

That was never a good sign.

Gilbert's brow dripped with sweat, _Francis...That bastard...he's probably having sex with Matthew at this very moment. Bastard! _Gilbert growled, picking up his car keys from his counter top, and running out his door, leaving it unlocked.

Lost in his thoughts, Gilbert didn't even bother to see that he also had a few missed calls, he was just focused on kicking Francis' ass for (possibly) jumping his little Canadian.

**...**

When he arrived at the Frenchman's house, he opened the door with ease, stepping in.

"It's not locked?" He whispered to himself.

Gilbert furrowed his brows, as he heard loud moans coming from Francis' room.

_Oh...Oh my dear Gott..they are fucking doing it.. _

The albino felt like he had been stabbed in the heart repeatedly, as his hand quivered.

He really didn't want to see the man he loved and his best friend together.

He shook the thought off, anger rushing throughout his entire body.

He twisted the door to Francis' room open.

**FML (Feliks, Matthew, and Lovino)**

The trio stood outside of Gilbert's house.

Matthew was terribly worried for the crimson-eyed man, "H-He's not picking up at all."

"It's unlocked, let's just go in dammit! I'm missing my favorite _novela_!

Feliks nodded at Lovino's suggestion, "I like, totally agree with Boss. And like, my head _hurts_," Feliks whined, throwing Lovino a dirty glare.

"I'm sorry that tomatoes will always come_ first_ in my life. They're my main priority above all else," the Italian man explained, raising his nose up in the air.

Feliks snorted. "Yeah, your main priority, _beside_ Antonio," he said with a smirk.

Lovino stayed quiet for a moment before uttering, "T-That's n-not true...bastard."

"Okay, okay. That's enough. Let's just...go back to the shop," Matthew suggested with a sigh.

Feliks rolled his eyes, "Like, Matthew. No one is going to buy anything right now. It's like midnight, and it's a Wednesday."

"Well, we can't stay outside his house all night," Matthew pouted, "let's go to my house instead."

Lovino was already opening the door to Gilbert's house, stepping inside, "Hey," he paused, inspecting Gilbert's home, "the Potato-bastard number two actually has a good sense of taste. The decor's really nice in here," Lovino gaped at the chandelier hanging from the high ceiling in the foyer.

The floor was completely granite, leading to the kitchen, which was medium-sized. His walls were covered with pictures of him, his friends, and family members.

Matthew gushed when he saw a picture of Ludwig and the albino when they were children.

The crimson-eyed boy looked so happy, and Matthew couldn't help but giggle softly at the way Ludwig's expression was completely blank.

The Canadian's head snapped up when he saw that Lovino had turned the TV on, making himself comfortable on Gilbert's couch.

"W-What are you doing?" Matthew asked, stuttering.

Lovino cocked his brow upward, "I'm going to watch my _novela_, duh."

He threw the remote control to the floor after he had the right channel.

"Like, what the hell is a nov-el-ah?" Feliks asked, coming back from the kitchen with a new ice pack on his bump.

The Italian groaned, "Idiots. _Novelas_ are Spanish soap operas."

Matthew passed the hazelnut-haired man a weird look, which Lovino returned with his middle finger.

"I can't wait until Gilbert gets back," Matthew muttered truthfully, hoping the crimson-eyed man would return soon.

**Gilbert**

"F-Francis!" The Frenchman thrusted in and out of the Brit, as the smaller cried his name out, trying to cover his face with a pillow

"WHAT THE FUCK?" Gilbert yelled, entering the room, "FRANCIS! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE HAVING SEX WITH MY BOY-"

Francis paused from his activity, turning his head to the side to give Gilbert a murderous glare.

Arthur's head popped up from under his cover, his face completely red.

"_What_?" Francis asked, cyanide dripping from his voice.

Gilbert froze, shocked that Francis was having sex with someone he proclaimed that he hated.

"U-Um...Yeah. Okay," the albino scratched his head nervously, "you see, I thought Matthew was...okay. Yeah. Have fun you two," he said, making a quick escape.

"Why does the name 'Matthew' sound so familiar?" Arthur wondered aloud.

"I HATE YOU _SO_ MUCH GILBERT!" Francis yelled at the top of his lungs, as he watched his silver-haired friend walk out of his house, without closing the door to his bedroom.

**...**

_Well, at least Matthew wasn't raped by Francis, _Gilbert thought happily, as he drove back to his house.

Of course Francis, and Antonio both lived in the same area as he did, so their houses were all around five minutes away.

The trio would never be able to survive without each other, so they came to the conclusion where they should all just live in the same neighborhood.

Reaching his house, the albino saw a very familiar car.

There was only one person he knew who drove a slick, charcoal black Maserati Granturismo.

_Lovino's here?_

The albino male gulped, worried for what the next few minutes of his life would come to.

_Lovino's going to murder me. _

_Why would he want to murder me?_

_ I'm dating his friend!_

_ Wait...maybe that's the reason why he wants to kill me. _

He carefully placed a hand on his doorknob, bracing himself for whatever evil sabotage the Italian set up in his own home.

Closing his eyes, he whispered quickly, "I regret everything I've done with my life," as he opened his house door.

**...  
><strong>

"Oh my God! _Elucidia_! Don't die on _Roberto_ now! You have to _survive_, for your unborn child!" Lovino cried, sobbing into Feliks' shoulder.

The Polish man's eyes were clouded with tears, as he sniffled, wiping his nose on one of Gilbert's decorative pillows, "Why's this shit like, _so_ fucking _sad_?"

Matthew was sitting on the floor at the foot of the couch, chugging down a bottle of maple syrup.

"Lovino, you were right," the Canadian began, "this soap opera stuff is addicting."

His violet eyes were glued to the screen.

Gilbert quietly hid behind the couch, on the verge of laughing his ass off.

Choking back a laugh, he took his time to sneak up behind the FML trio, grabbing the remote that was tossed to the floor a while back ago by Lovino.

Slyly, the silverette turned the TV off, which was the only light in the house that was on.

"G-Guys?" Matthew asked, shaking slightly. Feliks screamed, as the Italian man next to him quickly clung onto him.

"F-FUCKING BASTARD. DID HE NOT PAY HIS ELECTRIC BILL OR SOMETHING?" Lovino asked, frightened by the darkness that surrounded the three.

Feliks was freaking out, "Lovino! Like, get the hell off of me!"

The Canadian on the floor was absolutely terrified of the dark, and he didn't know what to do besides panicking and crying, "G-Guys...I'm scared."

The Polish man and the Italian pulled him up from the floor, both of them hugging him tightly.

A rustling noise came from the floor.

"What the fuck was that?"

"SHIT! PARANORMAL ACTIVITY BROSKI! LIKE, _NO_! I'M _TOO_ BEAUTIFUL TO DIE!"

"...I want Gilbert here already!"

The albino's heart strings tugged when he heard Matthew's soft sobs.

Aw...

Gilbert's such a douchebag!

_Too fucking adorable._

He couldn't resist this though. The albino's ghost white hand crept around the couch, brushing across Feliks' leg.

_"OH!_ OH MY _PONY_! Something just touched me!"

"Feliks I think you're overrea-" Lovino froze, feeling the soft, ghost-like skin lightly rubbing against his arm.

The Italian and the Polish man jumped up from their spots, desperately trying to run out of the house without bumping into anything, or having to deal with the 'ghost'_, _leaving a distressed and dismayed Canadian behind.

_"Oh mon dieu!_" Matthew cried, startled when pale fingers traced circles over his jean-covered thighs.

Gilbert licked his lips, then pinned Matthew to the couch, moving his face close to the blond's.

"Hello, Mattie," he whispered into the violet-eyed man's ear.

Matthew's eyes widen comically, "G-Gilbert? _YOU_! Jerk!" he yelled, hitting Gilbert with one of his own pillows, effectively knocking the albino off of the couch.

The crimson-eyed man laughed from the ground, "I couldn't resist! You guys were just so gullible!"

The Canadian's eyes watered, as Gilbert flipped a switch, turning the lights back on, laughing.

His 'Keseseses's' were cut short when he actually saw tears streaming from the blond's face.

"I-I seriously thought I was going to die!"

Gilbert held back a laugh, and embraced the blond in a tight embrace, breathing apologies into Matthew's ear.

Matthew smiled, his tears drying up, "I'm just glad you're here now," he said in his soft voice, which made Gilbert want to jump him even more.

Shit, I would've ran away with Feliks and Lovino.

_Must rape. Have to rape. No! I can't rape! Unfffff. _Gilbert unwrapped his arms, and stood up from the couch. He cleared his throat, "U-Uhm, so do you want me to drive you home then?"

"I was," Matthew fiddled around with his fingers, averting his eyes, "hoping I could sleep here."

_Shit. _

Gilbert bit his lip, "Sure you can Mattie. You can sleep in my bed, and I can sleep on the couch," the albino concluded, heading to his room to fetch himself a couple of pillows, not noticing the look of disappointment on Matthew's face.

**...**

"Goodnight Gil," Matthew said, walking towards the albino's room in the big, dark house.

It was absolutely no surprise to me that the Canadian was indeed scared.

He crept into the large, king-sized bed, frightened every time the bed creaked.

He did not want to be alone in this place.

Especially when he couldn't sleep.

His eyes were wide open, looking around the room in fear, until his eyes landed on the giant silhouette near the windowsill.

_ "Bruder...Where is my bruder...?" _A female voice boomed from the outside.

"Natalia! I told you not to follow me!" The familiar voice exclaimed, in a murderous tone.

Matthew screamed, running down the dark hallways back to the living room where Gilbert was sleeping.

**...**

The albino was awoken by the blond that was shrieking in his room. He immediately got up from the couch, running towards his room in the long, granite hallways.

They eventually crashed into each other with a loud **BOOM**.

"Ow..." They both rubbed their foreheads that collided together.

"What's wrong..?" Gilbert questioned, still holding his forehead.

Matthew held a shaky hand up, pointing one index finger towards his room.

The Canadian hid behind the crimson-eyed man, as they went searched the room for anything out of the ordinary.

"There are no ghosts Matthew. None," Gilbert concluded, pushing Matthew's bangs aside and giving him a kiss on the forehead.

When the albino began walking back to the couch, the Canadian grabbed onto his long sleeve.

"I...was hoping you could sleep here," he mumbled feebly.

_Shit!_

Gulping nervously, Gilbert agreed, climbing into bed along with the violet-eyed teen, who clung onto him.

The albino laughed at how cute and frightened the blond was being.

The Canadian's body face was pressed against the albino's chest, with his arms securely laced around pale abs.

Gilbert in turn, wrapped his arms around the blond as well, falling asleep quickly in the others arms, completely ignoring the obvious Russian hiding outside his house.

**In the Morning**

The albino woke up, the blond still in his arms, as he nuzzled in Matthew's golden locks.

"Mmm...Good morning Gil," Matthew greeted, sleepily.

Gilbert yawned, replying, "_Guten Morgen, mein lieber schatz._"

"Da, good morning to both of you too! Kolkolkolkolkol..."

**... ^J^ ...O_O ... D; ... What? ...**

"I-Ivan? What the hell are you doing in my room? I-In my house?" Gilbert roared, pointing at the Russian man accusingly.

Ivan pondered for a moment, "Um...Hm... I'm trying to woo Matthew," he stated with a smile.

The Canadian's jaw dropped.

What the _fuck_?

* * *

><p><strong>AN: KOLKOLKOLKOL. HAHAH, Kay. Well, this chapter... MEEEEEEEEEP. ): I DERN LIEK IT. But, I guarantee you, the next chapter will be like: "LOLOLOLOLOLOL. HA. That's pretty funny." ._. I hope. But nonetheless, I hope you enjoyed this chapter more than I did. *seppukus* **

Translations: German

**Guten Morgen, mein lieber Schatz**- Good morning, my precious treasure.

**Or something along those lines! :D**


	9. HEY LOOK! IT'S PRUCAN! :D

**A/N: Since the last two chapters haven't been 'up to par', I SHALL MAKE THIS...FRICKEN LONG. ;D Okay, 3,000 plus words isn't very long, but it's long for me. PSH. Whatever. OI LOOK! ALMOST A HUNDRED REVIEWS! *SPARKLES FLY DOWN FROM THE CEILING* Hey my eye hurts ): Kay, on to chapter 9! HOPE YOU ENJOY IT! I've decided to make this chapter completely crack. T T**

**...Is that...PruCan I see? :3 P.S. The Del Amo mall is a mall in LA!~  
><strong>

**Hi, this is for you Riley ;D  
><strong>

**Disclaimer: This has been disclaimed. And no, I do not own STARBUCKS. D:  
><strong>

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><p><strong>Thursday: Antonio<strong>

The Spaniard paced around his room, dialing Lovino's number for the tenth time that morning, hoping that this would finally be the lucky try.

"**_WHAT? Do you not realize you've called me at least seven times! There's a reason why I don't pick up, Tomato-bastard!_**"

Antonio laughed, overlooking the Italian's tyrannical tone of voice, "I just hadn't talked to you in two days," Antonio professed, "and I missed hearing your voice."

Lovino's gasp could be heard through the phone line.

"Is something wrong Lovino?" Antonio asked.

The Spaniard could picture the blush spread across Lovino's smooth skin as he stuttered out, "**_N-Nothing's wrong, bastard! Um.. I-I...m-miss you too... I guess._**"

Antonio's green eyes shone, as his cheeks tinted pink.

He smiled, "I'm so glad you do. Sorry if I interrupted your sleep, I'll call you back later. Bye Lovi-"

"_**T-There's no point in h-hanging up now, bastard! I'm already awake, you might as well t-talk to me.**_"

**...**

Once Antonio was done having his conversation with the Italian, he made his way to the investigation scene.

The sex shop.

There was a jittery feeling in the pit of his stomach when he stepped in that shop, he knew something was up.

He needed to be _focused_.

Oh boy... a focused_ Antonio_?

What the fuck kind of crack am I writing?

**Matthew**

"What do you mean by that Ivan? I hardly_ know_ you!" he cried out, throwing his arms in the air.

What the hell did this creep want from the Canadian?

HIS BLOOD?

Okay, probably not his blood.

Ivan laughed, "Kolkolkolkolkol... I also wanted to say," Ivan's face paled, he looked absolutely terrified, "Natalia is joining the competition."

"Who's Natalia?" Matthew whispered to Gilbert, completely shocked when he saw the albino's body completely still.

He laughed, a bit fakely, "There's no way Natalia would join this. Isn't she in love with you?"

"Da," he said with a sigh, sitting down on Gilbert's bed, making himself comfortable.

Okay, yeah.

All is normal when a scary Russian man breaks into your house, and sits on your bed.

Right.

"...Then what the fuck is she doing in the competition?" Gilbert asked, only confusing the Canadian next to him, even further.

"What's the competition?" Matthew questioned, glancing between the two, who neglected replying to him.

Ivan sighed once more, letting his body fall onto the bed, next to Matthew, "She's jealous of him I guess. I believe that she said, 'If you're chasing after him, then I'll get to him first, big brother,' and then she left," he said with a shrug.

I'd be fucking frightened.

Natalia?

In the competition?

There will be character deaths, I assure you.

Just kidding.

But people_ will_ lose vital regions.

Gilbert thought for a moment, before saying, "What will the Awesome _Me_ do? _Ach mein Gott_! Another psycho to keep Matthew away from!"

He shook his head, ignoring the blond who was narrowing his eyes at him.

"What's the competition?" He repeated again.

Ignoring the blond once more, Gilbert started, "Ivan, do me a favor, ja?"

"It depends...what?"

"GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!" He roared, "Natalia follows you around everywhere! She's _bound_ to be around here somewhere!"

Ivan's face paled, "NO! Don't leave me alone with _her_! She's going to _touch_ me in places that she really _shouldn't_!" The Russian cried, begging the albino man to let him stay in his house.

The crimson eyed man got up from bed, dragging Ivan towards the exit, on the other side of the by dragging, I mean: Ivan was clinging to the albino's legs, while Gilbert trudged to the door.

"Fuck! Ivan, let go of me!" Gilbert yelled, "Don't you think there's something wrong with this? YOU'RE A GROWN MAN, CLINGING TO MY FEET."

YEAH.

GTFO BITCH.

"No! Don't make me see her again! Please! I'll do anything!" Ivan yelled, comical tears dripping down his face.

Gilbert pondered for a second, "...Anything?"

"YES!"

The albino smirked, "Drop out of the competition," he demanded.

"O-Okay... Just don't make me see _her_!"

**...**

"Thank you for letting me stay at your house Gilbert," Ivan smiled darkly, with an ominous aura surrounding giant body.

Matthew shivered, hiding behind Gilbert, "Make him leave," the Canadian whispered.

"You think I haven't tried that?" The albino replied in a low hitched voice, then he coughed, "You're welcome Ivan."

The couple (and the monstrously terrifying Russian) walked to the kitchen for breakfast, finding something the weren't suspecting.

At all.

"Good morning..._Brother_," Natalia hissed, her eyes wide while wearing a psychotic grin, as she held up a long, razor sharp, chopping knife.

On cue, all three of them let out the manliest shrieks ever heard on Earth.

"N-Natalia, w-what...why...What the fuck are you doing in my house?" Gilbert asked, for the second time this morning, "Look, I know my house is pretty damn awesome, but I just-" The knife was thrown, missing Gilbert's face by mere centimeters.

"I'm not here to talk to you. I want him," Natalia pointed at the blond, quivering in his spot behind the albino.

Gilbert's jaw dropped, "W-Well, you can't have him."

The platinum blond woman shot a devilish look at the albino man, "Oh?" She drew a long, slick silver SW40VE gun from a pocket in her dark, blue dress, "How 'bout now?" Her smile widened immensely, when Gilbert's eye began to twitch.

"WHO THE FUCK WOULD GIVE THIS BITCH A GUN?" The albino man yelled, throwing his hands in the air.

As if he were called, Feliks burst through Gilbert's door, dressed like a Native American Indian. "LIKE, FREEZE EVERYONE! I HAVE A BAZOOKA, AND I'M NOT AFRAID TO USE IT!"

Matthew looked faint, "Wha...? Gil...I'm hallucinating. I see a Polish Indian in the room. "

For some strange reason, Ivan began stripping down to his purple boxers, whispering, "I'm ready."

"The hell are you ready_ for_?" Gilbert asked, a disgusted look planted on his face, as he pulled Matthew up against his body, shielding him from the all the strange people surrounding them.

Feliks charged at Natalia, an actual bazooka in his arms.

Matthew cried, completely perturbed by the _almost_ naked Russian man that suddenly tackled his...sort of boyfriend.

"I want to go home!" He yelled, his knees feeling a bit weak.

Gilbert pushed Ivan off of him, after jabbing the Russian's leg with a fork.

He rushed to the Canadian's side, after hearing a gun shot coming from the kitchen where Feliks and Natalia were fighting.

The albino grabbed the blond's hand and rushed outside.

**...**

"T-Toris?" Matthew asked, seeing the Lithuanian man standing outside Gilbert's house, "What are you doing here?"

The brunette smiled, "Hi...um..."

"Matthew."

He nodded, "Yes, Matthew. I'm waiting for Feliks. He said he'd be a moment, but he's been in there for more than five minutes so..."

Gilbert interrupted, "You _don't_ want to go in there man. It was so unawesome."

Toris agreed, knowingly, "O-Oh. Well, knowing Feliks, it usually ends that way...haha."

The albino yawned, "Yeah, okay. Let's go Mattie!"

Matthew waved goodbye to the brunette, and hopped into Gilbert's car, driving to who knows where.

**...**

"How did we end up at Starbucks?" Matthew asked, staring down at his creamy, caramel cappuccino.

Gilbert shrugged his shoulders, "I have no clue. I just wanted this cake pop," he stated, licking the chocolate covered shell, "Plus, you looked like you could use something to drink, before I tell you why we were... in that situation earlier."

His violet eyes locked onto Gilbert, "What is it?" Matthew asked innocently.

The albino took a bite out of the cakey goodness, "Okay, but...you're not going to like it."

Matthew sighed, "Just tell me Gil, or this is just going to become more and more confusing!"

Gilbert opened his mouth to confess what was going on, the competition and all, but he didn't have time to when French fingers wrapped around his throat.

"YOU _CONNARD_!" Francis yelled, shaking his albino friend, trying to strangle him. "BECAUSE OF YOU," Francis paused darkly, "I. DIDN'T. GET. TO. FINISH!"

What a friendly gesture.

He did it out of love.

Gilbert grasped onto his neck as well, trying to pry Francis' hands off, as his face turned purple.

Matthew sat in his seat, watching the scene in front of him unravel, sipping on his scalding hot cappuccino.

The Canadian had seen weirder things today, so he figured this would be relatively normal.

"Let go of him, Frog!" Arthur scolded, kneeing the blue-eyed man in the ass.

Francis purred, releasing his death grip on the crimson-eyed man. "Ah, you _really_ love my beautifully shaped butt, don't you _mon cher_?"

"Like fuck I do, bloody wanker," The Englishman breathed out irritably.

After catching his breath, Gilbert asked, "What the _hell_ is wrong with you Francis? And why are you with _him_?"

Francis placed both hands on his hips, "What the hell is wrong with _me_? What's wrong with_ you_? You walked in on us during a very important moment of my life!"

Arthur blushed, "D-Don't say that out loud, git!"

Francis ignored him, "I was finally able to plow his assh-" Arthur grabbed Matthews searing drink, and dumped it all over his lover's head.

Matthew giggled, as Gilbert stated simply, "Hey, you owe me three-fifty for that man. So unawesome."

"Here, I'll go buy you another one," Francis said, pulling his friend off to the side.

Gilbert questioned, "Seriously, what the hell's up? You're acting weird."

"Don't tell Matthew about the competition," Francis stated seriously.

Gilbert scrunched his brows together, "Why not?"

The Frenchman sighed, shaking his head like it was the most obvious thing on Earth.

Probably because it was the most obvious thing on Earth.

"Do you not realize how this could jeopardize your chances? Matthew will be so mad if you hadn't told him this to begin with! AND, the fact that you're also in the competition doesn't help."

Biting his lip, he agreed mentally, "You do have a point. But I can't just lie to him."

Francis shrugged, "You gotta do what you gotta do, _mon ami_," he said, patting his silver-haired friend on the back.

**...**

The couple left the coffee shop, then began walking around the outdoor part of the mall.

"I never knew Del Amo was this big," Matthew gaped, looking around the area.

Gilbert gave him a lopsided grin, "Wait 'til you see my awesome five meters," he muttered, "This place is nothing," he scoffed, glaring at the girls who were ogling at the two.

"By the way Gil, you haven't told me what the competition was-"

The albino saw this coming, and he quickly pushed Matthew up against a wall, crushing their lips together.

The Canadian gasped, then slowly grew to enjoy it, moaning against the albino man.

Quickly, he realized they were in public, and immediately tried to push the scarlet-eyed male off of him.

There was at least five flashes going off around them.

Damn fangirls.

_And_ fanboys.

"What's wrong Mattie?" Gilbert asked with a smirk gracing his lips.

Matthew blushed, stuttering out a meek response, "I-I...w-we're...p-public..."

The albino man took the Canadian's hand, giving it a light, gentle kiss, "How about we take it to a more private area then?" he whispered into the blond's ear, huskily.

Violet eyes glinted, as the blond smiled, nodding his head quickly.

Yeah.

The two practically ran back to Gilbert's car.

**Lovino**

When the Italian arrived at his office, no one was on duty.

Well, the one person (Feliks) who was suppose to be on duty (Feliks) was no where to be found.

Where the fuck was Feliks?

Oh yeah, he's still fighting Natalia.

He growled, "Fucking Polish bastard!" He opened the shop's door, paralyzed by the fact that it was unlocked.

The sign read 'closed', but it was unlocked?

Slowly, he stepped in the shop, making sure his gun was carefully tucked away in his jacket's pocket, just in case.

Making his way across the room to his office, he noticed nothing out of the ordinary. Everything was in place, nothing was missing.

"Pfft. Maybe one of those retards forgot to lock the door," he said aloud, trying to force his brain to believe that everything was perfectly conventional.

But then again, what's ordinary about a Mafia boss who owns a sex shop in LA?

The Italian sighed, running his fingers through his hair, before reaching for the doorknob to his office.

**Gilbert**

The albino pushed Matthew's body against the seats of his vehicle, climbing into the car as well.

They were in the back seats, Matthew laying down, with the crimson-eyed man on top of him.

He captured the blond, in a sweet, enticing kiss, fumbling with unbuttoning the Canadian's shirt.

They broke the steamy kiss, removing both of their shirts.

Gilbert looked down at the panting blond beneath him, and smirked.

Matthew gazed at him through his long eyelashes, lust clouding his eyes, "Gil..." he whined, pulling the albino towards him.

His scarlet eyes trailed down Matthew's body, as he swooped down to kiss the Canadian once more, undoing the button on Matthew's jeans.

He slid the blond's pants off in one swift movement.

Through his boxers, Gilbert rubbed Matthew's half-erect penis, satisfied with the moan he received from the blond.

Matthew wrapped his arms around the albino, looking him directly in his eyes, then began nibbling lightly at the pale skin on his neck.

Gilbert chuckled, slithering a hand into Matthew's boxers, cupping the blond's vital regions in his hands.

Pale, skilled, fingers ghosted over Matthew's cock, teasing the blond's sensitive spot.

As much as Matthew was enjoying it, he couldn't help but remember what had happened in their past. Tears streamed down his face, "Hah... W-Wait! Gil..."

**_The albino's lips ghosted over the blond's cock, as the Canadian bit back a low, sultry moan. _**

"What's wrong?" Gilbert asked, worry in his voice.

**_Matthew couldn't suppress his feelings for the silverette. If they were going to go this far, he needed to let him know. _**

The blond shook his head, "It feels like last time," he cried.

_"**G-Gil...I-I love you..," The Canadian admitted, as Gilbert smiled down at him.**_

His silver brows furrowed together, "No..I'm sorry! I _promise_ it won't be like last time," Gilbert said, lacing their fingers together, kissing Matthew's tear-stained cheeks.

_"**I love you too Mattie," the albino lied, not feeling an ounce of remorse.**_

Gilbert reached down, grabbing his lover's erection, pumping him slowly, while creating friction between them by rubbing their bodies together.

_**A few days passed, and the albino had acted like nothing had happened between the two teens. **_

Matthew's pink lips pressed down on his lover's collarbone, placing sugary butterfly kisses on his neck and shoulders.

_**Knowingly neglecting the Canadian, he began to feel a tinge of guilt in his conscience. Gilbert had to get rid of that feeling.**_

The pace of the albino's hand was faster, and moved smoothly, up and down the Canadian's shaft, a bit of pre-cum dripping from Matthew's tip.

_**"I don't love him," Gilbert admitted to one of his peers, in a simple statement, "he's annoying and too shy. I just wanted him to suck me off. That's all."  
><strong>_

Matthew moaned, a blush spreading across his cheeks as he buried his face in Gilbert's neck, biting down on it to hold back a scream of delight.

_**The Canadian paused in his tracks, his heart stopping as he had overheard his classmates' conversation.**_

The albino man groaned, feeling Matthew's sharp teeth dig into his skin, surely leaving a mark.

_**Matthew had felt like a fool. He was used by someone he thought he knew. **_

His back arched off the car seat, as a coil in his stomach tightened.

_**He was crushed completely.**_

"Hah... nnn...Gilbert!"

_**He never wanted to see the albino ****again.**_

Matthew released his seed onto the scarlet-eyed man's abdomen, moaning Gilbert's name.

Matthew fell back onto the seat, Gilbert on top of him, as they both rested their bodies, completely content._**  
><strong>_

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><p><strong>AN: Okay, so...Yeah. Sorry. That was a really lame way to show you guys how they...stopped talking? But then I described it...while Gilbert gave Matthew a hand job :D YEE! At least they went somewhere this time. ): SORRY. GOSH. *SHOT* SO! Review if you love me. OR. Review if you want to see what Lovino finds in his office and how he reacts to..."it" Or "him". (: I love you all~**

_**P.S. Firebird: STAY STRONG. Dick on a stick!~  
><strong>_


	10. HERACLES 1

**A/N: DANG. I love you guys (: Thank you to all of you who reviewed!~ I'm glad you guys liked chapter 9...NOW THAT YOU FOUND OUT WHAT HAPPENED WITH THE PRUCAN, onto the Spamano!~ :D HEHEE!~ If any of you know where 'Marluxia' comes from, I'll hug you. LOL. MAUVE. :D  
><em>100TH REVIEWER<em>: kooliobutterflyhahaha **

**Disclaimer: Yes, I understand that I do not own Hetalia...or anything else in this story :\**

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><p><em><strong>Antonio: How he got In.<strong>_

_After breaking and entering the sex shop, Antonio already had a feeling he knew where evidence would be hidden. _

_He thought about the time when Marluxia_—_er_—_Marcus...or whatever his name was, spazzed out when the Spaniard was about to open the office door. _

_Sneaking through the shop, he held his gun close to his chest ready to shoot anyone who came his way at any given moment._

_Kicking the office door open, he saw a placard placed upon his desk. _

_'Boss Romano'. _

_Antonio's emerald eyed lit up with excitement. If he caught this guy, he would get a promotion._

_He chuckled, then sat at the Boss' desk, skimming through his all his paper files. _

**_..._**

_The paper files were mostly bills for the utilities at the shop, or just a bunch of scraps with numbers on them. _

_They were completely useless. _

_"C'mon...big drug bust...c'mon," he murmured under his breath._

_Realizing that there were probably more files on the computer, Antonio turned the Boss' computer on._

_Frozen solid, the emerald-eyed man gaped at the picture set as the wallpaper._

**Matthew**

"So where are we going now?" The Canadian asked, hoping that Gilbert wouldn't want to go back to his house.

The war was probably still going on between Feliks and Natalia.

The albino thought for a second, "How about your place?" he suggested.

Shaking his head, the blond blushed, "No...my apartment isn't the best place to be right now," he added, "it's small and messy."

Rolling his eyes, Gilbert intervened, "I'm sure it's not that bad, let's just go. Better than being at my house, right?"

Matthew bit his lip, _'But Alfred lives right across the hallway..._'

The scarlet-eyed man asked, "So your apartment?"

_"_Y-Yeah...I guess," he answered nervously.

**...**

With all his heart, Matthew hoped for nothing more than his brother to _not_ be at the apartment area.

But with his luck, that wasn't possible. Alfred's car was in its usual spot.

_He had to choose today to stay home! Man..._

The Canadian's brother lived in the apartment right above his and came over to eat his food _all_ the time.

When he unlocked his door, he was hoping on finding no one inside.

Instead...

"H-Help me," Toris said from the ceiling.

What?

Feliks' boyfriend was dangling in front of the doorway by a rope, while Feliks was in the living room (still dressed like a Native American Indian), doing some sort of sun-dance...ritual thing.

Natalia was shaking in her place, cornered by the crazy Polish man. She shrieked as he came closer to her with a long, spear.

Ivan was sleeping on Matthew's couch, next to what seemed to be a Greek man.

Francis and Arthur on the kitchen counter, the Englishman trying to push the blue-eyed man away from him.

"Oh, hey Mattie!" Alfred smiled from his spot next to Kiku in front of the TV, a game controller in their hands.

Kiku was teaching him how to play Black Ops.

The blond Canadian was absolutely horrified, "W-When the hell? Alfred! Why is everyone in my house?" Matthew asked, trying to make his voice sound angry, but it came out as a high-pitched whine.

Not even bothering to take his eyes of the screen, Alfred answered, "They rang your doorbell, so I let them in."

"H-Help me please," Toris said again, while Gilbert's eyes wandered all over the room.

Growling, Matthew yelled, "Feliks! Your boyfriend is hanging upside down from my ceiling!"

The Polish man was engaged in a lively conversation with the platinum blond woman, after she commented on how pretty his nail polish was. "Like, I know. Pink is _so_, totally my color," he gushed with a smile.

Laughing, the albino said, "Maybe we should have just gone to my house."

Right as Gilbert stated that, his phone began to ring.

Picking up his phone, he checked the caller ID, "Hello, Awesome here."

Gilbert's eyebrows furrowed, as Matthew listened to the mumbling sound Ludwig was making on the other end.

"They _didn't_ sign the damned contract? Fuck! _Now_?" Ludwig's voice raised, but it still sounded like mumbling to the Canadian. "Fine, whatever. I'll be there soon."

The albino passed Matthew an apologetic look, "I have to go."

Matthew's eyes widened, "Gil...Gil! You can't leave me here alone with these people!" Gilbert's pale arms wrapped around Matthew's small frame, pulling the spectacled man closer to him.

"I'll be back soon," Gilbert said, giving Matthew a quick kiss on the cheek, before heading out of the apartment.

Matthew stared at the doorway for a moment after the albino left, sighed, then turned around to face the mess in his home.

Everyone in the room was staring at him.

"_Merde_..." he whimpered.

**...**

The Greek man was the least dangerous looking person in the room, so Matthew chose to sat next to him, as he tried to ignore the pleads that Toris was passing his Polish beau.

As he sat, he realized the olive-skinned man had awoken.

"Who are you?" The Grecian asked, his green eyes widening.

Francis and Arthur snapped up from their activities in the kitchen, hearing Heracles wake up, and moved over to the living room area.

"U-Uh! Heracles, h-he's no one. No one at all," Francis said, trying to take the Greek's attention away from the blond.

Heracles narrowed his eyes, "I wasn't asking you Francis," his tone was groggy, and tired.

Matthew shifted in his seat uncomfortably, hoping Arthur would stop staring at him, "Um...I'm Matthew. Matthew Williams. This is my apartment," the Canadian finally answered.

A smirk crept onto the Greek's face, as he leaned closer to Matthew, "Well hot damn. You're pretty cute," Heracles chuckled.

Blushing, the Canadian stuttered out, "I-I...u-um... I h-have s-someone I-I l-like. Uh...T-Thanks."

Arthur and Francis glanced at each other, sharing a look.

What the_ fuck_ was Heracles trying to do?

Was he _hitting_ on Matthew?

I sense another crack pairing.

**Lovino 'Boss Romano'**

Opening the door to his office, he saw nothing. Relief coursed through his body. And there he was thinking a certain Spaniard would be-

"Lovino?"

**Shit. **

The dark-haired Italian turned around, seeing Antonio hiding behind the door, a gun pointed right at him was slowly being put down.

His throat became dry, as he stared into Antonio's disbelieving and impaired emerald eyes**. **

"I-I... I'm really glad you're here Lovi... I need to tell you what I have found out," Antonio confessed, completely putting his gun away.

_ What? _

Sitting in the chair in front of Lovino's desk, Antonio began, "You see," he sighed, running fingers through his wavy brown hair,"your brother...is the notorious, 'Boss Romano'."

Is this guy for real?

Lovino deadpanned, "Are you serious?" he asked, shaking his head.

Another sigh was let out by the Spaniard, "I know it must be hard for you to accept the fact that your brother isn't as innocent as you thought, but look! Look at this! His wallpaper is a collage! Of tomatoes, and pasta, and then there's a picture of him and you when you were young! It's got to be him!"

The emerald-eyed Spaniard showed Lovino the hard, cold truth: That he was an idiot.

As funny as the situation was, Lovino couldn't laugh.

He had to keep his serious expression, and play along with his lover- I mean...friend?

I don't know anymore.

"What do you suppose we'll do, bastard?"

Antonio breathed out, "I guess I'll have to call for back-up. I'll probably arrest him tonight. And Lovino," he paused, feeling guilty that he had to let the man he loved, know that his brother was a drug-dealing mafia boss, "I'm sorry."

Hanging his head, Lovino bit back a laugh, pretending to be hurt by the false information, "It's a-alright...b-bas...Antonio."

The Spaniard nodded, "B-but if it's not too awkward, I-I'd still like to take you out tomorrow," he stated shyly.

Lovino's heart stung at this.

Of course he wanted to go out with the Spaniard, but now that he had suspected his brother to be the boss, it meant he was hot on his trail.

He couldn't take any more risks, and he'd have to get out of the country.

Fast.

Quickly, he thought, _I'll have to clear all evidence leading to me. Then clear, fratello's name as well. Damn! I'll have to go back to Italy. _

For a moment, he was silent, then he glanced at the green-eyed man in front of him, who was gaping at him with hopeful eyes.

_I'll never be able to see him again... _

Furrowing his brows, he let out a choking noise, trying to refrain from letting tears build up in his eyes, "I-I..." he glanced at the Spaniard once more, "I don't know Antonio."

He avoided the struck look on the others face.

"I...understand," the agent whispered, lowering his head, after giving Lovino a nod.

Standing from his seat, the Spaniard locked eyes with Lovino, then placed one chaste kiss on his lips, "I love you."

For a moment, the Italian felt his heartbeat stop completely, as heat rushed to his face, "A-Antonio..." he murmured the man's name.

_I love you too..._

Slowly, the Spanish man made his way out the door, wishing for nothing more than an answer to his confession.

All he got in return, was his own heart being crushed.

**...**

After Antonio had left, Lovino felt his knees becoming week, as he let out the sobs he held back.

Knowing things would end up like this, he still let himself become attached to the Spaniard!

_Why?_

He fell to the floor, while tears streamed down his face.

**Feliks**

When Matthew made a quick escape to the bathroom, Feliks swooped in.

"Like, what the fuck Heracles! You never told me you were in the competition!"

Francis and Arthur gasped, quickly covering Feliks' mouth.

They couldn't let the Grecian find out about the competition.

If he did, he'd win.

For sure.

I mean look at him!

He's fucking sex on feet.

But anyways...

"What competition?" Heracles questioned Feliks.

The Polish man rolled his eyes, ripping the Francis and Arthur's hands off of his mouth, "The competition I started. Y'know, like if you woo and sleep with Matthew, I'll give you a million dollars? Were you not there when I like, gave the whole speech thing?"

Arthur face-palmed, "Bloody idiot was asleep."

Heracles grinned, "Hmm...this competition seems way too easy. I'm in. He's pretty damn good lookin', if I do say so myself."

Feliks yelled, "_Nie_! Matthew is totally Gilbert's!"

"I am?" Matthew asked, walking back to the living room with a blush on his face.

Alfred piped up from his spot on the floor, "He is?" he scoffed, "Last time I checked, the bastard crushed his heart."

The Canadian's face paled, "U-Um..about that Al..."

Turning his head to stare at his brother, he arched a brow, "Don't tell me you actually like that promiscuous fucker."

Matthew took a step back, feeling the murderous aura that surrounded his brother, "If he crushes your heart again Mattie..." he began in an apocalyptic tone.

"I-I! Al, he won't trust me! It's d-different this time," Matthew protested.

Alfred scanned his brother, trying to find an ounce of denial, then sighed in defeat, "Fine. But I want to meet him."

Feliks popped in the conversation, "Like, Al, chill the hell out broski. Like, Gilbert's got it all in the bag man. They're totally good together, know what I'm sayin'?"

The American nodded his head enthusiastically, "Fo shizzle Feliks!" he and the Pole did a crazy handshake, that consisted of a lot of slapping..and weird facial expressions.

Arthur's eye twitched, "You're still the same as ever, bloody yank."

Alfred's blue eyes met Arthur's green ones, "HI IGGY!"

Francis and Matthew shook their heads, as they watched Alfred jump Arthur, "GET OFF ME YOU TWIT!"

**...**

It was not long after that Feliks pulled out a gun and a long, leather whip.

Everyone had left the apartment room in a flash.

"Thanks Feliks," Matthew flopped onto his bed, his energy had been drained by everyone's crazy antics.

The Polish man was untying Toris' roped, making him drop to the floor from the ceiling.

"Whoops. Sorry honey," Feliks apologized, receiving an exhausted lopsided smile in return.

"I'll like, see you at work tomorrow Matthew," the viridian-eyed man said, carrying his lover out of the apartment.

The spectacle-eyed man didn't dare to move, not even to change his clothes.

He just fell asleep.

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><p><strong>AN: Oh Antonio...Why are you so...? D: ARG. LOL. So yes, he thinks the Mafia Boss is Feli, and Lovino's planning to go back to Italy to escape the Police. :O DUN DUN DUN. And...Matthew's all caught up in the competition. More people will come to him...don't worry. I said 14, right? (: Listened to Daft Punk all while writing this. Sorry for the super lame ending though :T HAHA, WELL, REVIEW PLEASE! C: **


	11. HERACLESYAOADNANLIZRODERICH 1

**A/N: UGGGGHHHNN. School starts in 7 days. I DON'T WANNA GO BACK. ): BLUBLUBLUB. Okay, well hello there lovlies (: Chapter 10? How'd you like it? HEEHEEEE. Here's chapter 11!~ DRAMA IS ENSURED IN THIS SHIZZBALL. My head is spinning around Daft Punk. I love it.**

**OH BY THE WAY! New Poll (Go to my Profile to VOTE!) : Should there be a three-way (thingy) with US, UK, FRANCE?**

**Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN HETALIA. VERDAMMT!**

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><p><strong>Antonio<strong>

He felt like an idiot!

The Spaniard was already on his way to Feli's house, dialing his boss' number. He had saved all of the documents and proof onto his flash-drive.

Something in his body just didn't feel right.

Banging his head against his steering wheel, making the horn on his car beep, he realized how much of a jackass he must have sounded like to the Italian.

Telling Lovino that he suspected Feli to be the Mafia Boss was the worst thing he's ever done in his entire life.

He worked six whole years to finally get Lovino to go out with him!

Six. Long. Cold. Years.

And he blew it.

Was it really suppose to feel that bad? He just found the Mafia Boss' true identity, weren't the emotions coursing through his body suppose to feel some sort of elation?

But then again, how could he be happy when he knew the person he wanted to spend the rest of his life with...wasn't?

Shaking his head, he laughed, realizing that his love for Lovino was much more important than busting a huge case.

Just as his boss picked up, Antonio pressed the 'end' button, speeding up on the freeway.

He knew exactly what he had to do.

**Matthew**

The blond was pretty drowsy. Never in his life had he been so exhausted just by _talking_ to people.

Conversing is a very strenuous task, especially when you're Matthew Williams.

He was laying in his bed, mostly unconscious.

"Oh my, why's he's _so_ cute? I bet he'd be an excellent uke!" A familiar female voice rang through his head.

He was too groggy to move, so he stayed in bed, trying to fall back asleep.

_Maybe these hallucinations will go away if I pretend to be sleeping... _The Canadian thought.

"Shhh! He's sleeping..." One voice scolded in a stern manner.

_Or not..._

"His breasts look awfully firm. I can't wait to claim them, da~ze!" Matthew twitched, paling slightly.

When the blond thought things couldn't get any worse, he peeked an eye open, seeing that there were six people huddled around his bed, waiting for him to awaken.

The man who decided he would 'claim Matthew's breasts', was crawling on his mattress, his body inching closer to the Canadian's.

The violet-eyed man shut his eyes tightly, completely terrified.

"Im Yong! Stop it with this breast-obsession of yours, aru!"

A bored, Mediterranean man spoke, "When the hell's he going to wake up? I wanna screw him already and bail." Matthew shuddered, that guy wasn't serious, right?

The Greek man scoffed, annoyed by his Turkish friend, "What part of _'wooing_' do you not understand?"

"Oh yeah..."

Matthew chose this time to 'wake up'. He was getting tired of hearing the group's random drabbles.

Taking a deep breath, he slowly opened his eyes, sitting up in his bed, "W-What are you all doing in my apartment?"

Their conversations were instantly cut off, as they gaped at the violet-eyed man.

The woman Matthew had met before piped up first, "Hello Matthew! Just ignore these people, none of these people are that important!" She smiled, pushing away the Korean man that was trying to squeeze her chest.

"Hello Mr. Williams, excuse us for intruding," the aristocratic-looking man greeted politely.

Matthew asked, "Um... your names please?"

They all glanced at each other, before replying one by one.

"Liz! But you knew that!"

"Roderich."

"Im Yong Soo! Da~ze!"

"Yao, aru~"

He paused, staring at the Greek man he was sitting next to earlier that day. "Heracles. Nice to see you again," he winked.

"Adnan."

The Canadian nodded, making a mental note to watch out for the tan Turk, who was staring at him with lecherous eyes.

He coughed, "So..what are you doing here?"

Elizaveta grinned, "Isn't it obvious Matthew? We all came here for one reason."

She couldn't have been more specific.

"That reason being?" Matthew asked, attempting to sound annoyed.

Laughing, she replied, "We all came here to seduce you, silly!"

Freezing in his spot, Matthew gulped, "W-What? _S-Seduce_! Me?"

The Korean man's eyes lit up, "Yes, seduce... da~ze," he said in a low tone.

Matthew's teeth jittered, "W-Why?"

"Because, we have nothing better to do," Roderich admitted under his breath, as Elizaveta elbowed the side of his stomach sharply.

**...**

After a few minutes of being harassed by the intruders multiple times, and groped by a certain Korean, Matthew noticed a few things.

One: Heracles had his arm around Matthew's shoulders.

Two: Im Yong Soo's hand was creeping awfully close to his crotch.

Three: Roderich didn't really care about anyone in the room.

And Four: Adnan was _very_ jealous of him.

Apparently, the Turk had a thing for the Grecian, and was throwing murderous glares at the Canadian whenever Heracles wasn't looking.

It's not like Matthew could help it! He didn't want Heracles to have an arm around him, and he was struck by the awkward silence that came across the room, when Liz suggested they play a game.

"What kind of game, aru?" Yao asked, cocking his head to the side.

Smirking, the Hungarian woman answered, "The Card Kissing Game."

Matthew shuddered, he didn't like the sound of that. "I-I'm sorry... I can't play this game I'm kind of already dating someone..."

Elizaveta's face dropped.

"_What?_" Everyone snapped.

"I-I'm dating someone!" He apologized, rubbing the back of his head shyly.

Elizaveta wanted to ask who, but she decided against it, "R-Relax. We don't actually kiss, so it's completely fine."

Matthew gulped, "Um..I guess," he accepted shyly, knowing that if he refused, they'd all gang bang him right on the spot.

"Okay, so basically, all you have to do is pass the card around in a circle. But, you do it with your lips. Absolutely no hands. OR FEET. Got it?" Elizaveta pulled out a red card, placing it in between her lips, moving closer to Roderich, pressing the card up to his mouth.

Roderich paled when he saw Im Yong Soo's lips puckering at him, but passed the card along nonetheless.

The Korean had a perverse look plastered on his face, as he passed the red sheet onto Yao.

The line kept going until Heracles had the card. He held it firmly between his luscious lips.

**Mm... **His lips sure looked delectable.

But anyways...

Matthew blushed, flustered. What was he to do? The Greek man was moving in on him, as he slowly backed away against the wall.

Arching a brow, Heracles made a questioning noise, still closing in on the blond spectacled man.

The Canadian had no more space to move back to, and Heracles was only a few centimeters away.

The Greek slowly pressed the card against Matthew's slightly opened mouth, staying in that position for a moment way too long.

And of course, in the nick of time, "Hey Mattie! I'm ba—" Gilbert froze at the doorway entrance of the violet-eyed man's room.

Everyone in the room was frozen stiff at the deadly look Gilbert was sending them.

In the most cannibalistic tone ever heard, Gilbert growled, "What the fuck are you doing to my **boyfriend**, _bitch_?"

Shit. Just. Got. Real.

_**B-Boyfriend**? What? _The Canadian was flushed, as the word rang through his ears repetitively.

Heracles quickly separated himself from Matthew, "Nothing. I wasn't doing anything..."

Blood-red eyes glared savagely at the Grecian, "Lies," he roared, rushing towards the bed, and tackling Heracles, throwing them both on the ground.

How many times does Gilbert have to fight people?

"Gil! Stop! We were just playing a game!" Matthew exclaimed, hoping the albino wouldn't get hurt.

Gilbert's fists were clutching the Greek's collar, as he turned to face Matthew with disappointed eyes, "Are you sure?" he asked in a more calm voice.

"I'm positive," the blond smiled reassuringly.

Sighing, he got up from the floor, sending a stern look at the olive-skinned man on the floor.

Frankly, Heracles was stunned.

Adnan was still sitting on the bed, aghast.

No one ever knew Gilbert could be so (over) protective.

Matthew pulled Gilbert towards him, wrapping his arms around the albino's neck. The crimson-eyed man looked pleased, coiling his own arms around the Canadian's waist, then pressing his lips onto Matthew's for _everyone_ in the room to_ see_.

"Mine," he whispered into Matthew's ear, but loud enough for _everyone_ in the room to _hear_.

Matthew smiled, remembering what Gilbert had said about him, "Yeah? And now we're suddenly **boyfriends**? Since when?"

The albino hummed, "Since I decided we'd be," he smirked, "What do you say, Mattie? Do you want to?"

The Canadian was surely a shade darker than Gilbert's eyes, as he nodded his head vigorously, breathing out the word 'Yes'.

Jerking the violet-eyed man closer, the albino crushed their lips against each other once more, slipping his tongue in to make it even hotter.

Liz pulled out her camera, snapping a quick picture. Oh yeah. Watching real life Yaoi was _way_ better than actually trying to woo Matthew.

She'd _give_ a million dollars to see this.

Fuck! _I'd_ give a million dollars to see that.

The couple broke apart, panting heavily.

They shared a deep look, knowing exactly what the other was thinking.

Both of them snarled harshly, "GET OUT!"

The six nuisances darted out of the room quickly, not wanting to deal with Gilbert's wrath (or Matthew's polite suggestions).

Gilbert threw Matthew onto the bed, ridding himself of his shirt.

Matthew blushed, "A-Are you sure you want to—"

"Yes," Gilbert answered, cutting the Canadian off, "Unless you don't want to."

Violet eyes were clouded by lust and love, "I want to," he spoke in a mellow voice.

Gilbert's eyes softened, giving Matthew a quick peck on the cheek, "I'll be gentle."

The Canadian's eyes widened when Gilbert dove down to nibble at his neck, while undoing his jeans.

He moaned, feeling the albino's sharp teeth against his bare skin.

Hastily, Matthew slipped his shirt off, getting with the program.

Crimson eyes watched in amusement, as the Canadian fumbled with the buttons on Gilbert's shirt.

His face was completely rose red.

**...**

Removing all their clothes was the easy part.

Gilbert licked his lips hungrily, glancing over Matthew's virgin body, his eyes wandering down to his crotch area.

The Canadian bit his lip, averting eye contact with the albino man, "G-Gil..." he began.

"Hmm?" The albino snapped out of reverie, smiling at the blond below him.

Matthew turned a shade darker, "_Je t'aime_."

The Prussian was even more turned on, "I fucking _love_ it when you speak French," he whispered huskily, pressing his chest against Matthew's. He moved a pale hand down to his lover's cock.

Matthew moaned out, "_M'embrasse._.."causing Gilbert to kiss his collarbone sweetly.

"Ah, what did you ask?" The albino question, with a coy grin.

The blond gasped, when Gilbert's cold hand slithered to his backside, "I-I... Mmf... K-Kiss...me..."

Chuckling lightly, Gilbert did as he was commanded, dipping down to capture the blond in a sugar-filled kiss.

**Lovino**

The Italian had called a meeting at his house before he was to leave back to his country.

Their base was no longer safe, so he had to hold the meeting somewhere.

Soon after calling them all, his entire gang gathered up in his house, prepared to listen to what their boss had to say.

"I'm leaving for Italy tonight," Romano spoke loudly, so that each person in the room could hear.

Gasps and whispers spread across the room like a wildfire, and one man even had the courage to speak up.

"Boss, why are you making such a rash decision? Don't you think we should wait this throu—"

"_Shut up_," he barked at his subordinate, who jumped, shocked by Lovino's cold tone, "The FBI is hot on our trails. They think my brother is the mastermind behind the drug dealings," some of his lackeys laughed at this.

He threw a glare at them all to ensure silence. When they saw the look on his face, they knew he meant business.

"When they find out Feliciano isn't the one behind all this, who do you _think_ they'd go after? I'm leaving tonight. Cover _all_ of our trails," he concluded finally.

One of the guards that were standing watch outside dragged a body into the room.

"Hey Boss! We caught someone!"

Lovino gaped at the limp body of Antonio Fernandez Carriedo.

Blood trickled down the Spaniard's face, as he looked up to see his lover.

Their eyes met, both of them staring at each other in pure shock and horror.

Antonio's eyes watered, as he hung his head, allowing himself to fall unconscious.

"What should I do with him?"

Romano held back sobs.

_I can't cry. Not in front of the entire mafia._

But he couldn't hold them back for long.

Everyone was on edge, as they heard a light sob coming from their boss.

Someone was going to die tonight. No doubt.

"If he's dead," Lovino cried, but kept his tough demeanor, "I will fucking _rip_ your organs out with my own two fucking _hands_."

The guard stood still, "I-I'm pretty sure he's alive. H-He's breathing! I swear!"

Letting out a sigh of relief, he commented, "He better be. Bring him here, to me," he ordered. Hesitantly, the buff guard lifted the Spaniard up, carrying him to his boss.

Amber eyes shone under the kitchen light, as he commanded the guard, "Put him on the couch."

"Now all of you bastards," his voice boomed throughout the room, "do your fucking jobs."

Nodding, they all attempted to rush out the door, piling at the entry.

Lovino made his way to the couch, lifting Antonio's head onto his lap, brushing away a few stray hairs.

His eyes—the way Antonio's eyes looked when he found out the truth.

The _real_ truth.

The Italian would never be able to have the same relationship with him again.

For perhaps the last time, Lovino leaned down, and placed a light, sweet kiss on the Spaniard's lips, "I love you too_._"

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><p><strong>AN: ;A; I love Spamano. So much. UHHHHHHHHHH IT KILLS ME TO WRITE THIS. GRRRRRRRRRR.. AND SO, THE PLOT THICKENS!  
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**AND ANOTHER THING!: I know you guys want some PruCan smut..But...there would be no point in the competition if they just had sex. :x So...THEY **

**WON'T GO ALL THE WAY JUST YET! But if you're patient, things will happen!~ REVIEW PLEASE!~  
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**Translations French:**

**Je t'aime: I love you.**

**M'embrasse: Kiss me **


	12. LIME AND NAIL POLISH

**A.N: BLUB. BLUB. I don't want to go back to school.. ;A; When school starts, I won't update as much. :T I'm sorry, but I'll make the most out of these last days of summer! (: Thank you all for the support you have given me! Herp. Derp. I can't think anymore...  
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**warnings: LIME. AND BOSS!Romano is kind of...MEAN. :O IN THE MOST SEXY WAY!~**

**Disclaimer: I own...nothing.**

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><p><strong>Antonio<strong>

When the Spaniard awoke, he had realized he wasn't where he once was before.

It had felt like an eerie nightmare—creeping through Lovino's front yard, hearing all the murmurs and deep, hearty voices of grown men.

Then he was spotted behind the Italian's tomato plants, and was dragged inside, after being hit repeatedly on the head, causing him to bleed.

He had tried with all his might to stay conscious, to see one of the Mafia's meetings for his own eyes.

His normally vivacious green eyes were a shade darker, as he looked face-to-face with the notorious Italian Mafia leader, Boss Romano.

Eyes widening, he recognized the flawless sun-kissed skin, bold amber eyes, and the stray hair that curled upwards.

Everything he saw...was certainly Lovino. Never in his life had he felt pain like this before.

His heart took the most impact, which made him terribly lethargic.

Coming back to the present, the emerald-eyed man turned his head, glancing around the large room.

Trying to move himself up from where he lay, he found that his body was completely immobile.

He was tied to a bed.

Not only was he tied, but he couldn't feel his legs. Almost every body part of his was absolutely numbed.

Gasping, he finally realized his situation: He was trapped.

Cursing aloud, he attempted to struggle from the ropes that strapped him down, already knowing that they wouldn't budge.

He let out a strangled cry that pierced through the thick walls of the house.

The young Italian man must have heard, as he casually sauntered into the room, "So I see that you're awake Antonio," he commented, sitting down next to the older man's body.

Antonio furrowed his brows, "Why...? Why are you doing this? Why didn't you tell me that you..."

Lovino leaned towards the brunette, pressing their foreheads together, "I'm sorry," the Italian whispered, then pushed his lips against Antonio's.

The Spaniard hadn't kissed back.

He only let his tears drip from his face, "I want to know! I deserve to know about you!" he growled, choking back sobs, before his voice lowered, "Lovino, please. Let me in, tell me how you really feel."

Averting his eyes, the Italian couldn't stand to look at the way the Spaniard begged.

It was horrible.

He sighed, "I inherited the title of the Boss from my Grandfather. I-I...didn't know this would happen. I didn't _want_ it to happen, Antonio, I swear. I...I _love_ you _too_ much, I didn't expect that I'd ever have to let you go. But then you joined the law enforcement, and I had to distance myself from you. I'm sorry..."

Biting his lip, Antonio asked, "So this is it? You're seriously going to _leave_ me here, and go back to Italy after we've _confessed_ to each other?"

The emerald-eyed man's voice was shaky, as if he were about to shatter into a million pieces.

Lovino turned his head, unable to answer the Spaniard.

Antonio stared at him, "Before you leave, I have one favor to ask of you," his confidence rose immensely for a man who was tied down to a bed.

Arching a brow, the Italian questioned, "What?"

"Sleep with me."

**Matthew**

After they shared the passionate kiss, Gilbert began placing sweet butterfly kisses on Matthew's chest, as he toyed with one of the Canadian's pert nipples.

Trailing kisses from the blond's chest, all the way to his naval, Gilbert's eyes glistened hungrily as he stared at Matthew's ego.

The blond blushed, "G-Gil?" he whispered, as the albino above him spread his legs apart, "W-What are you doing?"

"You don't have to worry about anything," the albino began huskily, "I'll make you feel like no one has before," he ended in a voice was a smooth as silk.

Gilbert wrapped his lips around Matthew's penis, blood red eyes glancing up at the blond to see his reaction, as he swirled his tongue over the tip of it.

Matthew let out a hedonistic moan, his face flushed, as sweat began dripping down his torso.

_M-Merde! How did...Gil get so good at this?  
><em>

I bet the albino practiced on bananas.

Nice bananas.

The Canadian could feel the triumphant aura the albino was giving off.

So he was _AWESOME_ at sucking cock, big deal.

Gilbert slid his tongue over the blond's member, from the tip all the way down to it's base.

Matthew shivered, slightly arching his back off of his mattress.

Licking his cock completely, the albino opened his mouth, wide enough to fit the blond, and took him completely in his mouth.

Tears welled up in Gilbert's eyes, before he began to bob his head up and down, making the blond moan even louder.

He grabbed a pillow to cover his mouth and face.

There was no way to describe how embarrassed he was.

Nonetheless, Matthew couldn't help but buck his hips upward, almost choking the albino man.

"Ahhn! S-_Sorry_! I-I'm so s-sorry!" He apologized, throwing the pillow off of his face to look down at his lover.

Giving him a blank stare, the albino only began to bob his head faster, focusing on bringing the amethyst-eyed man pleasure.

Gripping his sheets, Matthew felt a coil build up in the pit of his stomach as he tossed he head back, moaning out wantonly.

Gilbert could tell his boyfriend was ready to release by the way the blond writhed.

His breaths were short and hitched, completely out of breath.

Oh how Gilbert wished he could have snapped a picture. Matthew looked so beautiful—his sweaty face and tousled hair was quite the turn on.

_Shit! Shit! _

"Gil! I-I'm g-gonna c-cu—!" Gilbert bobbed his head once more, then removed himself from Matthew, his lips coming off the blond with a 'pop' noise.

Matthew screamed the albino's name out loudly, releasing right onto the Prussian's face.

Gasping, the Canadian made a giant 'O' shape with his mouth, as he stared at what he just did.

Gilbert looked like he was about to laugh, but Matthew couldn't really tell. There was too much cum on his face.

Wiping the warm substance off, Gilbert flicked it at Matthew, making the blond shriek in disgust.

"Eeek! Why'd you flick it at me?" He whined childishly, as the albino laughed—awesomely—before wiping his face off with a kleenex.

He moved from his spot to lay next to Matthew.

Matthew furrowed his brows, "How about you? Don't you want me to do something?"

Gilbert shook his head, with a smirk, "It was already awesome enough. I got to see you make lewd faces."

He wrapped his arms around Matthew's body, kissing the blond's hair multiple times, before letting a content sigh escape his lips.

Matthew leaned into his touch, allowing the albino to spoon him tightly.

Humming, the blond thought to himself, _Nothing could possible ruin this moment._

And here's the cliche part where I write: THINK AGAIN, _BITCH_!

**...**

Everyone's favorite cross-dresser barged into the room in search of his best friend.

He flung Matthew's bedroom door open without knocking, sauntering into his room.

"Like, Matthew I'm here to paint your nails— OH EM GEE," Feliks paused, dropping his manicure kit onto the floor.

_Why the hell did I give Feliks my apartment key again?_

It was a terrible decision that he regretted to the fullest.

Gilbert's head shot up, as he turned to stare at the Polish man in shock.

Feliks looked pleased, "Did you two like..._bone_?" he asked, with a satisfied smirk.

**Lovino and Antonio  
><strong>

Had the Italian heard incorrectly?

Did Antonio just ask him to sleep with him?

Lovino blushed hard, "I..." he stared down at the bonded man who gaped back at him with watery, pleading green eyes.

Gulping, he nodded his head, receiving a thankful look from the Spaniard.

Slowly beginning to strip, he realized his situation, pausing.

He glanced at the Spaniard who was tied at his wrists, and his ankles.

Smirking, he quickly undid the older man's pants, sliding them down to the rope that bonded his legs.

Green eyes looked over the Italian, slightly panicked, "L-Lovi? Are you going to u-untie me?"

Somehow, the small-framed Italian looked much more dominant. His eyes were narrowed, in a more manly way, as he smirked, inching towards, the now shaking, Antonio.

Everything about him screamed, 'SEME!', and the Spaniard didn't like it one bit.

Licking his lips, Lovino began to peel the others clothes off, paying no mind to Antonio's protests.

Only one thing ran through his mind: _I'm in charge. I'm in charge. I'm in charge... I'm a BOSS._

Dipping down, his mouth latched onto Antonio's neck, nipping it harshly, as he ran his fingers through the waves of brunette locks.

Both of their face tinted pink when the Spaniard let out a deep moan.

Lovino's head snapped up, as he stared at Antonio with wide, amber eyes.

The Spaniard smiled, "It felt good. Don't worry, I'm just surprised you're the one taking initiative," he admitted shyly.

Once more, the Italian returned back to his more serious expression. It was almost as if he were a different person.

Lovino growled, "Never underestimate me, Antonio."

He shot his hand out, holding the roots of Antonio with a vice-like grip, before smashing their lips together, immediately slipping his tongue into the others mouth.

Antonio's eyes glazed over, kissing back the Italian.

Unbeknown to Lovino, Antonio was secretly trying to get out of the ropes that bonded him.

The Italian was now straddling the emerald-eyed man, as he ripped his own shirt off.

As a normal man would be, Antonio was completely and utterly turned on. Lovino's hips rubbed up against his, teasing his body, already knowing that his Latino lover was half hard.

Slipping his hand into the only article of clothing left on Antonio's body, Lovino's fingers ghosted over the tip of the Spaniard's cock.

"Oh Lovino... _te quiero_..." he groaned, watching in awe as the Italian tugged his boxers down.

Pressing three fingers up to his lips, Lovino commanded, "Lick."

The Spaniard obeyed, parting his lips to suck on the digits that were inserted into his mouth.

His soft, pink muscle rubbed against each individual finger covering them entirely with his saliva.

**Matthew**

Matthew was sitting up in his bed, his head buried in his palms, trying to hide his embarrassment, while Gilbert was smirking at the Polish man standing in the room.

To the Canadian's horror, Gilbert actually had the nerve to answer, "No. But I did give him an awesome blow j—" Matthew clamped a hand over the pale man's mouth.

"W-We didn't do anything!"

Pursing his lips, Feliks hummed, blowing his freshly bubblegum-pink coated nails, "Mmmhmmm. Anyways, I didn't only come here to give you a super sexy manicure, I also came here to tell you that Lovino's going back to Italy."

_Lovino's going back to Italy?_

Matthew was quite dumbfounded, "Why? Did something bad happen? Oh _mon dieu_! W-what does that mean for _us_? I'm _never_ going to be able to pay off my student loans!"

Feliks sat down on the edge of the bed and shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly, neglecting the fact that his best friend and Gilbert were butt-naked.

"He like, left me a note on his desk saying that he was going back to Italy and like, seriously wouldn't be back for a while. He even put me in charge! I feel like, so totally reliable!"

The albino man thought this would be a good time to pop into the conversation, "What about Antonio? Does he know about this?" His eyes shone with concern. Of course he knew his friend was in love with the Italian and he didn't want his Churro to get hurt.

Sighing the Polish man answered, "I have no idea. I've tried calling him a ton of times, but like, he's not picking up the phone at all!"

The Canadian thought for a moment, "What if he's already left to Italy?"

That was a depressing thought. One of his best friends left the country—for God knows how long— and didn't even bother to say goodbye _or_ tell him?

All three of the men knew something was up.

Sure, Lovino was a moody, PMS-ing, crotchety man, who seemed like he didn't give a fuck about anyone besides his brother or himself, but deep, deep down... he was...

...I forgot what my point was.

Anyways, Feliks, Matthew and Gilbert wanted to get to the bottom of this.

"Let's go stalk some Italians!" Feliks exclaimed.

Gilbert arched a silver brow, "What?"

Matthew pondered for a minute, then looked up at the other two as if a light-bulb had clicked in his mind, "We should probably go to his house first, right? I mean, he couldn't have possibly left yet," the Canadian reasoned, "Have you checked the flights from LAX to Milan? That's where his family is, non?"

The Pole smiled, "Yes, they don't leave until tomorrow morning," he smiled deviously, "There was one leaving tonight, but—let's just say that plane may never take off again. I made sure of it."

The Prussian man was officially freaked the fuck out, "Ooh...kaay...?"

**...**

Whispering to his beau, the albino man kept a wary eye on Feliks, "Mattie, your friend is totally weird. It's unawesome. Just sayin'."

Giggling, the Canadian replied, "Yeah, but you do _have_ to admit, he's _pretty_ badass."

Glancing at Feliks, the albino bit his lip. The Polish man was talking animatedly on the phone, twirling his hair with a finger, waiting for his friends to get dressed.

Gilbert muttered, "Yeah, I guess you're right," he then asked, with a knowing grin, "but I'm still the _awesomest_ person in the world, right?"

Matthew stayed quiet for a moment, glancing at Gilbert shyly, "Y-Yeah...let's go with that."

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><p><strong>A.N: Hello self-confidence, how are you today? .-. PRETTY FRIKEN TERRIBLE. Being flamed does not feel good at all, children. :C I'm totally lacking motivation to finish this story. D: SOMEONE HELP! Well, anyways, reviews make the pain go away! ;A; REVIEW PLEASE!<strong>

**Translations (HEY I DID THIS MYSELF! :D AREN'T YOU PROUD?) I'm sure you knew it anyways though...LOL.**

**Spanish:** Te quiero- I want you. :3


	13. BOARDING SCHOOL 1

**A/N : HELLO GUYS! LONG TIME NO TALK. So I started high school. :) It's not so bad. Besides all the extra homework, and the kinda mean teachers~ OHONHONHON~ What chapter is this again?.-. I forgot. ATTENTION: The next few chapters are just going to be flashbacks on how Prussia and Canada met during summer school in their High School days. :D also WHAP (World History AP)  
><strong>

**To A.S.T.E.R.I.S.K: Technically, all Spanish descendants in America are considered Latino. Anyone who has a bit of Spanish in them is considered partially Latino. I guess it depends on your opinion of it all. Some people say Latino is only used for people from Latin America, but I'd like to think he is I guess. (: Hope I cleared that up for you.  
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**Disclaimer: Nope. I don't own.  
><strong>

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><p><strong>Bad Touch Trio (F.A.G.)<strong>

"F's? Four F's?" the albino teen glared down at his report card, sulking in his seat as his body slowly slid down into his chair. Never in his life had he been so disappointed in himself.

He hadn't expected to pass every single one of his classes with flying colors, but failing four out of six classes was just out of the question.

Cautiously, his Spanish friend sauntered over, wincing as he caught a glimpse of the crimson-eyed teen's grades. "S-Sup Gil? Haha...~" he laughed fakely, trying to lighten the pale boy's mood.

Unable to answer, the albino just sat in his seat, then let his head fall onto the desk with a loud "**THUNK**".

"Ohonhonhon~ I got straight B's again!" Francis danced across the classroom, waving his report card around for everyone to see, as he strutted towards his friends. Pausing, he saw the look on Gilbert's face, freezing immediately. "Oh..." His slender fingers gripped onto Antonio's collar, as he jerked the Spaniard forward. "He failed, didn't he?" Francis interrogated, with an appalled expression.

The green-eyed Spaniard weakly nodded, as Francis admitted his own thoughts, "I knew he would..."

Gilbert arose from his desk, sending his friends a heinous look, "Damn you guys! I can hear every fucking unawesome word you say, okay? Jesus, you're like two fucking feet away from me—"

"Beilshmidt! _Language_!" Their teacher yelled. "See me after school."

Letting out a sigh of exasperation, Gilbert lifted his leg, and slammed his foot onto one of Francis' brand new shoes, successfully crushing his friend's toe.

"_Merde_! You fucking _bitch_! These are my new _Marc Jacobs_!" Francis exclaimed loudly, causing everyone in the classroom to turn their heads in shock.

Ms. Emery did not look very pleased.

**...**

Somehow, the entire trio ended up at after-school detention. On the last day of school to boot, which completely blew _shit_.

"How did you end up in here Antonio?" The crimson-eyed teen asked his friend, curious to why such a good child such as Antonio was sent to detention.

The Spaniard's green eyes were completely glossed over, as he was halfway snapped out of his reverie.

"Oh...well, in fifth period, I confessed to Lovi," he gushed, "We told the teacher we had to go to the restroom, and made out for a couple of minutes in the bathroom. Let's just say I got a bit_ too_ excited thinking about it during sixth block, so I was sent here by Mr. Coxsucker."

Waiting for their teacher, the trio attempted to predict the consequences they'd have to face for their mishaps.

"She's going to fucking castrate us, I know it. She's a feminist, so she's probably one of those lesbian women who want to chop our junk off and turn us into one of_ them_," Gilbert concluded, running his fingers through his silver hair.

Antonio cried, guarding his crotch area, "I don't want to be a eunuch! I need my dick! I'm saving it for Lovi!"

Adding onto the whines in the room, the Frenchman shook his head, "_Non_! I refuse to let that woman touch my precious _Little Francis_!"

With a click of his tongue, the albino commented dryly, "Whatever, this is unawesome. I just wanna go back to the Annex and get fucking _baked_."

Surely enough, at this point in time, the supervising teacher decided to step in, though it wasn't the teacher they were initially expecting.

His hair was a mess, and his shirt was half unbuttoned and ruffled. He seemed a bit out of breath. "S-S...Sorry I'm late. Just s...stay quiet for the time being, and I'll let you leave early."

Smiles graced the trio's faces, this is why they loved their WHAP teacher, Mr. Cho-Duh. Apparently, the married man was having an affair with the school nurse, and to shut everyone up, he offered extra credit.

"Awesome! So we can leave in about ten minutes?" Gilbert asked, hoping his teacher would agree.

Mr. Cho-Duh turned to around after buttoning up his shirt, still completely flustered. For a moment, the older man paused, then scanned each of his student's faces. "Well, Beilshmidt," he passed the albino a lopsided apologetic smile, "I was given orders to have a firm chat with _you_, but your friends can go."

Francis and Antonio quickly stood up, saying goodbye to Gilbert while grabbing their things, then ran out of the room.

Gilbert narrowed his eyes, muttering under his breath, "Thanks for having my back, dipshits."

Clearing his throat, Mr. Cho-Duh finally got to the point, "You have a lot of potential Gilbert. You just... need to put your intelligence to better use."

"I have no idea what your trying to get at, Mr. Chode."

With a chuckle, Mr. Cho-Duh pulled out some of Gilbert's test scores, "You always get top marks on tests, but when it comes to homework...you just don't do it. I don't understand, you're a genius Beilshmidt!"

The albino rolled his eyes, "Do I really have to hear this lecture from you?"

"You're going to boarding school over the summer, or you'll have to repeat the eleventh grade."

**Matthew**

Fluttering his eyelashes, the Polish man tried to convince his best friend to go to Europe with him over the summer break.

"Like, _please_ Matthew! I don't want to go _alone_! Why do you want to be stuck in_ school_ when it's like..._summer_?" his viridian-eyed friend implored.

Matthew was at Feliks' house, helping his friend pack his belongings for his trip.

Pushing his glasses up, he laughed, "Sorry Feliks. I need the extra credits if I want to get this scholarship. I really want to go with you, but I just can't. Maybe I'll go next year?"

Pouting, Feliks rolled his eyes, "Yeah whatevs. Fine. See if I like..._care_!"

"I'm sorry Feliks... I know we planned this months ago.. I'm really sorry. But I need this."

"Fine. Whatever. It's like, okay with me," he lied, " but like, where are you going to be doing this summer school tutor thing at?" Feliks asked.

Matthew stared down at all the tops and skirts Feliks was bringing, before reluctantly placing them inside Feliks' luggage.

"U-Umm... that one all boy's summer boarding school. It has a pretty huge campus, and they have dorms where I'll room with the guy I'm going to tutor."

Arching a brow, Feliks didn't exactly like the sound of that. His innocent best friend would be rooming with a crazy psychotic delinquent?

Probably so.

"Do you know the guy's name?"

Shrugging his shoulders, Matthew answered honestly, "I don't really remember. I just know his last name sounded really German." Feliks' body perked up after hearing this piece of information.

He totally knew that the Canadian beside him had a huge thing for German guys.

A _huge_ thing.

Catching the suggestive eye-brow-wiggle Feliks sent him, the Canadian blushed, stuttering out a retort, "I-I...NO! We...W-We..I-I'm going to be tutoring him! I-I... Please! D-Don't make me get any ideas in my head!"

He bit his lip, trying not to picture him and some blond-haired, blue-eyed German guy violating him inside the dorm they'd be staying at.

Feliks only smirked, content with how he left Matthew's mind, "Sure. Have fun with whoever he is. Being with him, won't be as totally **awesome** as going to Europe with your _best_ friend."

**The Vargas Household  
><strong>

Oh how the elder Italian twin hated his family.

He hated them with a burning passion. Every time the word 'Feliciano' came out from his grandfather's mouths, all he felt was pure animosity and utter detest. _He_ was the older brother, not Feli.

His name was Lovino Vargas, and he fucking deserved to be recognized for his accomplishments. He'd had perfect grades since he hit grade-school, he was great at sports, and he was an excellent cook.

The only problem with him was that...well...he was a jackass.

It's not that Lovino wanted to be a jackass, he couldn't help himself. He wasn't proud to be the family douche-bag, it just happened. Let's be honest, his younger twin brother was no genius, and he was afraid of almost everything that moved.

The thing about his _fratello_ was that he was the sweetest kid around, and Lovino couldn't deny it. His brother was just too damn sweet for his own good, which is why he hated him.

How could Lovino hate such an angelic child?

**...**

"Are you FUCKING me? That fucking bastard," Lovino fumed, pointing at his younger brother who was sitting in the seat next to his, "is taking over the family restaurant?"

Feliciano's eyes welled up with tears, as he cried silently. He hated it when his older brother yelled.

Lovino's heart was stinging, as he glared daggers at his grandfather.

His old man knew how much he wanted to be the owner of the restaurant, and yet he passed it down to his younger brother? How fucked up was that?

Lovino felt like his grandfather secretly hated him.

Trying to calm the older twin down, the Roman man assured the amber-eyed teen that he'd get to inherit something as well.

"D-Don't worry Romano, you'll get...my sex shop. Yes. My sex shop. It's very popular, you'll be happy with the earnings," he tried to keep the boy from screaming his other ear off.

The older man was worried this would happen.

Fuck.

He completely anticipated that this would happen, but he couldn't let Feliciano know about the truth behind the Vargas name.

"The...sex shop? What the_ fuck_ kind of _replacement_ is that? I want compensation. This is fucking unfair!"

Taking a deep breath, the twins' grandfather's expression was suddenly serious, "Feli, please go to your room."

Nodding, the younger of the twins walked out of his grandfather's office, closing the door behind him.

Crossing his arms over his chest, Lovino shook his head, "I always knew you hated me, but this is just low, even for you old man—"

"Enough!" Romulus boomed, raising his voice at his grandson for the first time in his life.

Lovino shrunk back in his seat and nodded, with wide eyes firmly planted on his grandfather's.

Romulus was finally going to tell Lovino about the real family business.

Something that he'd been waiting to do for a very, very long time.

"The reason why I couldn't let you have the restaurant is because Feliciano would not be able to handle the job that you've inherited," he stated in a stern voice.

Lovino furrowed his brows, "T-That makes sense...he wouldn't be able to handle working at a sex shop at _all_—"

Shaking his head, Romulus interrupted, "That's not the only thing I wanted to tell you about."

"What?"

Opening one of the drawers in the desk, his grandfather pulled out a gun.

Lovino's eyes widened even more, frozen solid in his seat.

"Are you familiar with the Italian Mafia?"

**Gilbert**

Waking up from his sleep, the first thing he heard was his brother calling his name.

"East, your bus is going to be here any minute, and you're not even dressed? You'd better hurry up."

Gilbert groaned, rolling onto his stomach, covering his head with a pillow.

The crimson-eyed teen was kind of ticked off that his brother was barely going to become a freshman, and he was the one that was going to be going to extra classes?

How unawesome was that?

**...**

Sure enough, his bus to the Academy was there within three minutes.

Fortunately for him, Gilbert always looked sexy, no matter what he wore, or how early in the day it was.

So he threw on some jeans and a t-shirt and was out of his house with a carton of milk in one hand and a backpack full of his junk in the other, right as the bus pulled up in front of his house.

Stepping onto the bus, the albino realized a few things things:

1) Everyone on the bus looked lost and confused.

2) There were two adult chaperons who looked like pedophiles, both were female.

3) None of the people on the bus were nearly as awesome as him.

He plopped his bottom down in a seat at the very end of the bus, as he felt the yellow vehicle of doom start to move again.

**... **

Gilbert was bored.

Tremendously bored. Everyone on the bus had fallen asleep, and the drive to the academy was still about two hours away. They hadn't picked up all the students yet, but he knew the bus was close to full, so they had to be picking up the last few students sometime soon.

He could've sworn they had traveled to about everywhere in LA to pick up the all dumbasses in the bus.

It was already around nine o'clock, and the sky was turning a dark shade of Prussian blue.

Entering the last area, crimson eyes trailed over the freeway exit.

"Diamond Bar?" he murmured to himself, looking out a window, scanning the houses he passed by.

The area was definitely a rich one.

Gaping at a rich man stepping into a red Corvette, he noticed that that same man had about four more Corvettes in his driveway.

They picked up a snotty Norwegian kid, who sat in the front of the bus next to one of the chaperons. Unfortunately for rich kid, the Danish boy in the next row kept trying to hit on him.

Growing awfully annoyed by the traffic, Gilbert was beginning to go insane. He got out of his seat, walking to the front of the bus.

The bus driver was a tanned, petite, young woman. She had long, jet black hair, and deep, chocolate-colored eyes.

"Kid, you need to sit the fuck down," the bus driver's mouth twitched, as she sent Gilbert a murderous glare.

Gilbert put his hands up in defense, "I know exactly how irritated you are. I've been cramped in the back of a fucking bus for eleven hours, surrounded by brainless idiots breathing down my neck. I just wanted to know _how_ many more of these brainless idiots will be coming aboard this _joy_ ride."

The bus driver turned to look at Gilbert for a second, getting a good look at him, when they reached a stop light, "You're not bad kid. And you're not _that_ stupid. Hm. The next kid lives in Pasadena. He's not a brainless idiot, he's one of the tutors. Initially, the tutors and the students were to ride on separate buses, but the other bus driver forgot to pick him up."

Laughing, the albino took the empty seat nearest to the bus driver.

At least the woman could help him pass time.

"What kind of bus driver forgets to pick someone up?"

"Dunno kid, I dunno. But since we're already near, I guess we'll just pick him up. We should be at his house in five minutes, if my GPS is correct."

**...**

Gilbert was still talking to the bus driver, who he soon found out was named Reese Rizal. They finally arrived in the neighborhood where the tutor was, stopping at a modest house with a two car garage. Nothing fancy, it was middle class.

Honking the horn, Reese was growing impatient. The kid still hadn't come out after five minutes.

The crimson-eyed teen offered to go ring the doorbell, and Reese agreed, "His name's Matthew Williams. Go on, hurry."

Nodding, Gilbert shot out of the bus, sauntering towards the front door, ringing the doorbell multiple times.

To the albino's surprise, a shy looking long blond-haired girl opened the door. She had amethyst eyes, with glasses on. Obviously, she'd just gotten out of the shower, but there was still a stray curl sticking out of her hair.

Said girl opened her mouth to speak, but was cut off by the albino.

Smiling brightly, the crimson-eyed man took a step forward, pushing the door open, and leaned against the door-frame.

"Hi, I'm Gilbert Beilshmidt, is Matthew Williams home? He must be your brother," Gilbert insisted, continuing on about himself, "I like movies, and walks on the beach at night. Preferably with cute blond girls like you," he winked, causing the girl to blush.

"I-I...I'm Matthew Williams," the Canadian spoke softly. Gilbert's eyes widened, as he realized that the person he thought was a girl, was...a guy.

He just hit on a guy.

No, he just hit on a really _cute_ guy.

"I'm r-ready to go now. S-So..yeah. I guess we can get on the bus..." Matthew stated, averting his eyes, so that he wouldn't meet Gilbert's shocked gaze.

Gulping, Gilbert nodded, as they both began walking back to the bus.

Where Reese was watching the entire scene, laughing her skinny ass off.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Why does the bus driver have a GPS? I don't know. It's fucking portable. C: Hope you enjoyed the first part of the flashback. Took me a long-ass time to write it! D: LOLOL Does anyone get the joke, Cho-Duh? Pronounce it out loud. Heh. REVIEW PLEASE, BECAUSE I LOVE EVERY ONE OF YOU!**

**OH, P.S Reese is my OC for the Philippines :3 Oh yeah, inserting a bit of my own culture in Huur.**


	14. BOARDING SCHOOL 2

**A/N: Do I really want to write fanfiction right now? :/ Kind of...LOL. :D HAI GAIS, oh yeah. I was planning on updating this before school started after the long weekend... but... Eheeh. Shit happened? School is fine, better than I expected!~7,000+ WORDS?  
><strong>

**Disclaimer: Hidekaz Himaruya is the creator of Hetalia, not I. Please give him credit for the sexy characters. :D**

* * *

><p><strong>Matthew<strong>

The Canadian was baffled—to say the least—to see the pale teen in front of him was actually the German roommate he and Feliks were talking about the previous day.

He couldn't help but giggle at the coincidence, when he entered the bus with the silverette.

Amethyst eyes wandered over towards the small-framed woman in the driver's seat. The dark-skinned woman bore a giant smirk, obviously content with something.

Matthew heard his roommate mutter, "Reese, you better shut the fuck up," under his breath. Taken aback by this, Matthew frowned, whipping his head to stare at the albino with a (sort of) angry pout. To Gilbert, he looked constipated (in the most adorable way).

The bus driver, who Matthew guessed was Reese, only grinned with mischievous eyes. "You mad, Gil?"

Fuming with utter embarrassment, Gilbert decided he would just take a deep breath, and ignore the Filipino woman. But of course he'd have to flip her the bird before he began the silent treatment.

Reese pouted, then turned her head to face the road once more, sticking her nose up in the air, as if she had smelled something horribly disgusting.

Matthew was pretty amused, the bus driver and Gilbert seemed to get along pretty well, although Matthew researched his roommate, discovering that this was his first year at the summer boarding school. Maybe they knew each other outside of classes? He highly doubted that though.

The blond soon found his eyes scanning over Gilbert's body, recognizing every nook and cranny under the albino's tight, fitting t-shirt. He bit his lip, wondering how he'd ever be able to take staying with Gilbert for an entire summer, and _pretend_ to _not_ want to be ravished by him.

It would be _Hell_, but he would have to manage.

Suddenly, crimson eyes met his, making Matthew squeak in mortification. He didn't mean to stare at the pale boy for that long.

"Uh...so...again, I'm sorry for mistaking you for a girl..." the albino chuckled awkwardly, scratching the back of his head.

Unable to form words, all that came out of the blond's mouth was, "Ephh...huh?" He blushed, covering his face with his hands. _ He probably thinks I'm retarded! Oh mon dieu!_

"Pfft! Dude, you okay?" Gilbert asked, trying to hold back a crackle.

Matthew stuttered out, "I-I...I..Fine. I'm fine."

Clearly, the young Canadian was not fine, he was flustered.

Some _sexy_ albino guy mistook him for a female.

Mistook him for a girl, then brought it up again, which only made his situation even more awkward.

**...**

Sensing the uncomfortable silence, Gilbert decided to take action, and actually start up a decent conversation, "So, why're you here Mattie?"

The Canadian's eyes seemed to soften as he answered, "Honestly...I was suppose to go with my friend to Europe, but my family didn't have enough money to pay for my trip. I came here as an excuse, so that he wouldn't offer to pay for my ticket. But hey, it's good for my transcripts, right?"

"Man, that sucks...I would much rather go to Europe than go to this shit-hole," he murmured the last part, hoping Reese hadn't heard.

Matthew laughed weakly, and turned his head back to Gilbert. "It's all pretty okay, Feliks will be back soon."

An albino eyebrow popped up questioningly. "Feliks? He sounds interesting..."

His violet eyes shone, as he sent Gilbert a wide grin, "Oh, but you've never met Feliks. He's the most flamboyant man I've ever met. Sometimes, I don't even understand his personality! He goes to school in drag and he paints his nails...I can't even explain it."

Startled, Gilbert questioned, "He's gay?"

Matthew gasped, his eyes widening slightly, "I...uh...um...I.."

The albino chuckled, "It's completely fine if he is. I have a gay best friend, and a rapist of a bi best friend."

"W-What?"

Gilbert's crimson eyes softened as he began talking about his two friends...Churro and Frenchie.

"Churro— er...Antonio is gay. He's 'in love' with this moody Italian dude. And Frenchie, also known as Francis, (see; molester) is in love with himself. But he _spreads_ his love to everyone."

Matthew squinted his eyes, "By spreading his love, do you mean he has AIDS?"

A pale hand smacked Matthew flat on the back, as Gilbert burst out laughing, making everyone on the bus jump up. "Of course not! He's just a total flirtatious man-whore."

Skeptically, Matthew arched an eyebrow, "I see. He's not going to this...r-right?"

"You're virginity is safe and sound Matthew, believe me. Just because he sounds bad, doesn't necessarily mean he's terrible in school. He's the most _slightly_ above average guy I know."

**...**

Matthew smiled softly, listening intently to Gilbert's rambles about his and his friend's adventures together. They all sounded so different, but they seemed to fit together and make a terribly rambunctious trio.

".._.Ja_, and my brother...Ludwig. Man, don't even get me started on him," he shook his head, almost in a disappointed manner.

Giggling, the Canadian asked, "What's wrong with him?"

Shrugging his shoulders, he replied, "He's just so..stoic! I don't know. He never shows any emotion. It's fucking _unawesome_."

"I'd rather have your brother than mine. My brother and I are twins. Our personalities are the only difference: He's more outgoing and popular. I get mistaken for him a lot though."

Gilbert's hand was now rested on Matthew's lower back, as he sent the blond a crooked grin, "Don't worry about it. I'm sure you're very different. I bet you're so much cuter than him."

Matthew was silent, as a blush spread across his cheeks, "I-I... um..."

The albino realized what he said, and his eyes widened comically, "Ah...ahah. Yeah. Sorry 'bout that Mattie," he laughed.

To change the awkward subject, the albino pointed at the boarding academy sign, "L-look! We're almost at the academy! This is the place you and I are going to waste our summer Mattie. Isn't it great?"

Deadpanning, Matthew laughed dryly, "Ha...yeah. It's going to be a blast."

**...**

For some reason, the academy was in Orange County.

"Why the hell's it in the OC?"Gilbert growled, staring out the window to gape at the perfect scenery. Although it was dark out, he could still see the ocean because of the moonlight.

Matthew fidgeted in his seat when they arrived at the huge school.

Reese stood up, grabbing a clipboard near her seat. She was obviously annoyed by the students' overly obnoxious behaviors. They all acted as if they were still in grade school.

Clicking her tongue, she began rapidly, "Listen up! You're all here for one reason: YOU FUCKED UP."

Pausing to stare at all the gaping faces, she smirked, "Now you better straighten up your acts, so that you can move onto to higher levels of education. I'm Reese Rizal, and I'm going to be a counselor here at Ridegcrest Academy."

In the sweetest voice she could muster, she smiled widely, which seemed a bit too perky, "Please feel free to ask me any questions. If you've gotten your dorm room information, you may proceed to the dorms after I announce which room you'll be staying in."

Gilbert was stunned to find out Reese was a counselor. He was sure if she was left _alone_ with a kid, she'd murder the poor bastard within seconds.

"How the fuck did you become a counselor?" Gilbert interrogated, narrowing his eyes at the tan woman.

Twisting her head slightly over her shoulder, she smiled coyly, "Oh, I have my ways, Gilbo," she winked, causing the albino to shiver in disgust.

Matthew bit his lip, before murmuring, "Why didn't you tell us you were a counselor earlier?"

The Canadian didn't expect her to return an answer, but she shrugged, and replied nonetheless.

"You never asked."

**...**

Reese announced which rooms they'd be staying in loudly, making sure everyone on the bus could hear the sound of her high-pitched voice. Her eyes skimmed over the paper attached to her old, half-broken clip board.

"...Room 69," she began, receiving a few chuckles from the kids still seated in the yellow death-trap. "Really?" she sighed, "Matthias and Nikolai will be rooming there."

Whistles and cat-calls were being made at the two; the rich, snobby kid sinking slowly into his seat, obviously embarrassed, while the hyperactive blond smiled widely, then embraced the high-class boy.

Gilbert chortled, "Sucks for them."

"Why do you say that?" Matthew asked, curious.

The albino passed Matthew a knowing look, "Woman, please. They're both gay, duh. They'll be ridiculed all throughout the summer."

Sweat dripped from Matthew's forehead, "O-Oh...I s-see..." He squirmed in his seat uncomfortably, waiting for Reese to announce his and Gilbert's names.

Gilbert, of course, took notice of this.

**...**

"Room 813, huh?" Matthias asked Gilbert, as he passed the albino and Canadian in the hallway.

"That's us," Gilbert smiled back at the Matthias.

With a wink, the wild blond with blue eyes suggested, "Maybe sometime you guys could stop by Room 69? I'm sure Niki here would enjoy a bit of company." The Dane wrapped an arm around Nikolai, and in turn received a growl, and a hard push.

"Like hell I would," Nikolai stated coolly. "And don't call me that, _unless_ you _want_ to be castrated in your sleep."

Eagerly watching the Norwegian stalk away to the room down the hall, Matthias whispered, "He's so feisty! I love it!" he exclaimed, his eyes trailing towards the lower region of Nikolai's backside.

Soon after, the Dane darted towards his roommate, placing a lax arm on Nikolai's shoulder.

"I worry for his safety," Matthew said lowly, watching the pair disappear around a corner.

Gilbert rose a fine brow, "Don't worry 'bout Matthias, he's a big boy."

"I wasn't referring to Matthias..." Matthew coughed.

The albino finally decided to open the door to their room, only to be interrupted by another person shortly after placing their belongings near the gigantic bed in the center of the room.

Slowly, Matthew inspected their living quarters, "Well, this room is...smaller than I had imagined." The violet-eyed teen opened the bathroom door, scanning the restroom area. Then he made his way toward the mini kitchen. Just a sink, a tiny fridge, and a stove with a few cabinets above it.

"At least we have our own shower?" Gilbert mused, with a crooked grin, plopping himself onto the bed.

He stared in shock at the king-sized bed that took up more than half of the room.

"Where's the other bed?" The Canadian asked, in a slightly panicked tone.

Interrupted by a certain uninvited counselor, both the boys jumped up, when a high-pitched exclaimed cheerfully, "It's gone!"

Reese's head was peeking into their room, staring at Matthew and Gilbert with a creepy Cheshire grin.

Matthew's heart started to beat faster, "W-What do you m-mean it's g-gone?"

Coming into the room completely, Reese answered, "We got rid of it years ago. No one's ever complained though. This_ is_ known as the _love_ room, anyways." She smiled.

Blushing, Matthew repeated, "...The...l-love r-room?"

Gilbert's eye twitched, before he burst into a fit of laughter, "THAT'S GOTTA BE THE STUPIDEST THING I'VE HEARD ALL DAY!" He rolled onto the bed, pounding his fists into the mattress, trying to contain his hysterical chortles.

"It's true! All of the kids who have stayed in this room together have ended up together," she claimed, crossing her arms over her chest.

Matthew quivered, his eyes shifting over towards Gilbert's body every few seconds.

Getting to the point, Gilbert sighed, "What did you come here to tell us Reese? The Awesome Me needs my beauty sleep."

"I'm going to pretend I never heard that," the Filipino woman began, "but my intention was to tell you, Mr. Beilschmidt, your schedule."

Rolling his eyes, Gilbert sat up, so that he could hear what his counselor was going to say to him.

"There are no teachers here, just counselors, supervisors, and tutors. For this summer, Matthew will be your tutor, he'll basically be your teacher. Supposedly, one-on-one lessons seem to be more effective than listening to an old guy give lectures all day, so we're giving this a test."

Wanting to speak, Matthew quietly raised a hand. "Yes Matthew?" Reese asked sweetly, looking at the blond expectantly.

"U-Um..where do we have the classes?"

"The classrooms. I'll be here tomorrow morning to take you guys there, so don't worry about it," she said conclusively, ending the conversation as she started to make her way towards the door.

"W-Wait! What do we do about the bed?" Matthew asked desperately.

Reese turned her head for a moment, and smiled darkly, "Sleep on it," before she closed the door behind her.

**...**

"You coming into bed or not?" Gilbert asked, patting the spot next to him, inviting Matthew to come under the covers.

Matthew stood beside the bed, with a white, stuffed bear cuddled in his arms. Blushing, he nodded, as he slipped into bed.

"This is going to be a long summer," the blond whispered to himself, letting out a long, low sigh.

* * *

><p><strong>Next Week :Gilbert:<br>**

The Canadian was awoken by his roommate, who was apparently eating a bowl of cereal. In his face.

"G-Gil? What are you doing?" He groaned, "It's three o'clock in the morning...c'mon." His normally violet eyes were dark, as he squinted at the albino hovering over his half-conscious body.

Smirking, Gilbert pointed out, "It's Saturday Mattie, your first Saturday with the Awesome Me! How does it feel to spend your Saturday night with a sexy Prussian like me?" he asked eagerly.

Pulling a pillow over his head, Matthew covered his pink face, and mumbled, "Gil...go back to bed."

"Don't be such a stick-in-the-mud!" The albino cried out, "Tell me how it feels!" he whined, taking a bite of his cereal, then began nudging Matthew with his knee.

Gilbert dug his knee into Matthew's back, almost as if he were massaging the Canadian.

Matthew moaned, "Oh! Mmm...feels good..."

Freezing, Gilbert stared down at the writhing male beneath him.

"Hmmm...don't stop...keep going...Gil," Matthew said, sleepily.

It was Gilbert's turn to blush. The Prussian stopped nudging Matthew, then ran to the kitchen to put his bowl into the sink.

Without another word, groan, or whine, Gilbert rushed out of the room, slamming the door shut.

**...**

What was Gilbert suppose to do when he had unexplained feelings for his male roommate?

Bug his friends.

Dialing Francis' number, Gilbert held his phone in front of him, shaking it rapidly, "Frenchie! Pick up! Pick up!" He was sitting against his dorm room's door, shocked and confused. The call he had dialed went straight to voice mail.

He tried again, this time calling Antonio. He only received a voice mail.

Slamming his phone into the ground, he buried his head in his hands, running his fingers through silver hair.

_Why am I feeling like this? _

"Oi, oi. You okay _anak_?"

Gilbert yelped, as a tan hand was placed on his shoulder.

"Reese? What the _fuck_ are you doing here?"

Pouting, she replied, "Helping out a friend in need."

Gilbert gave her a stern look.

Sighing, she admitted, "I got in trouble, and got put on night guard duty. Gosh, you're no fun at all Beilschmidt."

"Hah. That's _wunderbar_," Gilbert said sarcastically, "why aren't you.. 'guarding'?"

She scoffed, "Because that's boring as _fuck_. Now tell me, what's wrong?"

"You wouldn't get it," Gilbert said, turning his back on her, beginning to get up from his spot.

She grabbed him by the arm, pulling him down. "Oh I would. Believe me, I already have a feeling that I know_ why _you're so flustered."

"Oh?" Gilbert asked, chuckling.

Nodding, she said one simple name, "Matthew."

Gilbert was frozen solid, "What?" he asked venomously, narrowing his crimson eyes at his counselor.

"You like him," she laughed. "Admit it."

The albino turned around, retracting his arm quickly, then opened his door, "Bitch, you're fucking mental. I'm not gay."

"Not yet," she stated cockily, her voice equally as threatening as his.

He shut the door, walking into his room. Gilbert stood in front of the bed, watching Matthew's chest rise and fall as he breathed in his sleep.

His eyes were closed, and his hair was ruffled up by the pillow, except for that one stray strand of blond that curled outward.

Ignoring the overflowing feelings inside of him, he thought to himself, _There's no way in hell I could like him. _

_**...**_

At exactly 8:13 AM, Matthew decided to wake up, although he was tired by Gilbert's crazy wake-up call earlier that morning.

"Finarry, you'vre awoke!" Gilbert exclaimed, walking out of the bathroom with a toothbrush in his mouth.

"_What_?"

Gilbert rushed back into the bathroom, spat out whatever was in his mouth, and ran back out, "Finally, you're awake!" he smiled.

Giggling, Matthew smiled back, "Yeah. I am. Now what are we suppose to do on Saturdays? Do I still have to take you to class?"

Shaking his head, Gilbert pulled Matthew out of bed, "Get ready! The weekend is ours. We're gonna go off campus and hang out with Matthias and Nikolai."

"Matthew stretched as he stood up, raising his arms over his head."

Gilbert couldn't resist looking when Matthew's flannel shirt rose up to reveal his toned stomach.

_Wait! I'm NOT gay!_ He nodded, looking away.

Though he kept playing that same scene in his head, and his eyes kept lingering back to Matthew's body.

How could he _not_ think Matthew's soft, smooth, sun-kissed skin was absolutely enticing?

Coughing, he muttered, "I'll be at Matthias and Nikolai's room. Meet us there when you're finished changing."

"Okay," Matthew smiled at the albino, slipping his shirt off to throw on a new one.

Gilbert's eyes widened comically. He slowly reversed out of the room, taking in the sight of Matthew's chest, before he found his back against the doorway.

The Canadian stuttered out, "A-Are you okay?"

"Yeah...no. Wait. Yeah, I'm good. I'm gonna go...to their room now," he chuckled awkwardly while opening the door, his eyes still glued to Matthew's body.

"Oh..." Violet eyes stared at the albino, a bit freaked out.

Gilbert shook his head, "Yeah, see you in a bit."

**~Do Do Do~ **

Matthew chuckled, as Gilbert's shoulder bumped into his own.

"I can't believe Matthias actually tried making out with Nikolai!" Gilbert exclaimed, doubling over with laughter.

The roommates were at the fair. It was around eight o'clock at night, and the sun had already set.

The fair was the epitome of fun. Especially when you were with a crazy albino, and a sexually frustrated Danish teenager.

The tall Dane pouted sadly, "Shut up! We were having a moment, I didn't know he'd freak out and run!"

"We did," the pair beside the Dane said in unison.

Jutting out a quivering lip, Matthias cried, "It was perfect! The romantic movie, then the walk through the fair...and then the perfect kissing scene at the top of the Ferris wheel! It was meant to be!"

Choking on his own laughter, Gilbert attempted to speak, "S-Stop... _mein Gott_, my stomach hurts," he clutched his stomach, and his face was completely red.

"Where do you think he could've gone to?" Matthew asked quietly.

The two geniuses shrugged their shoulders, "We were hoping you would know where to go."

Face palming, Matthew began to devise a plan. "Let's split up and look for him."

"I call going with Matthew!" Matthias said happily.

Sticking his tongue out, Gilbert pulled Matthew towards him, "Nah bitch! He's my roommate. You _lost_ yours."

The Dane stuck his nose up in the air, and trudged away in search of his cute little Norwegian.

**...**

"Well, we know for sure he isn't in any of the rides," Gilbert said, dizzy from the huge, spinning ride the two just went on.

Matthew leaned onto the albino to keep his balance, "Yeah, I mean, we rode all of them, and we didn't catch a glimpse of him. Let's go to the food booths now!"

The pair stopped by a hot dog stand, ordering two large weenies.

Moving over to a table, they spotted two familiar faces, "Hey! Isn't that Nikolai and Matthias?"

Matthew nodded, smiling, "Yeah! I guess they made up—" The Canadian cut himself off when he saw the Norwegian pull Matthias' face towards his, and kiss him square on the lips.

Gilbert 'awuh'd', while munching on his hot weenie.

**...**

After watching their friends eat each others faces off, Matthew and Gilbert decided it was time to go back to their dorms.

"That was... fun?" Gilbert said awkwardly, pushing his hands down into his pockets. He breathed out, and watched as the heat collided with the cold air so that he was able to see his breath. He growled, "It's summer...why the hell's it so cold out?"

Matthew stayed quiet. He wasn't expecting that to happen with Matthias and Nikolai. In a strange way, the Canadian felt a touch of envy. Why couldn't he and Gilbert have that sort of relationship?

Without realizing it, Matthew bumped into the albino in front of him. "Are you feeling alright, Mattie?" Gilbert paused, pressing Matthew's forehead against his.

"I-I'm fine," Matthew blushed.

"You're a bit cold..." Gilbert said, pulling away from the Canadian.

Fidgeting with his fingers, Matthew repeated himself with a huff, "I'm fine."

Gilbert chuckled, smiling down at the violet-eyed teen, "Okay birdie, whatever you say." The albino swooped down, pressing his thin lips against Matthew's soft cheek, which in turn caused the blond to blush profusely.

"I-I...G-Gil?" Matthew's voice cracked, and his heart began pounding faster and faster, as Gilbert wrapped his arms around his waist.

"No, it's not a dream. You've been kissed on the cheek by none other than: the Awesome Me."

* * *

><p><strong>Next Month :Matthew<strong>**: **

"...And how do you find the value of that?" Gilbert asked his tutor.

Matthew's head fell to the desk, "Gil...use the Quadratic formula. Please...just do it. It's eighth grade material..."

"...What's the Quadratic formula again...?"

The Canadian was ready to jump from the edge of the third floor.

His boyfriend/student was hardly getting better in the Math department.

Gilbert had already taken his tests for the other subjects, passing them all with flying colors.

"C'mon Gil. The Quadratic formula? It doesn't ring a bell at all?" He asked, hope filling his voice.

"Not at all."

"They made a song about it!" Matthew threw his hands up in the air, "If you don't pass this next test, I won't be able to go with you on our date this weekend!"

Gilbert's jaw dropped, "A-Are you serious? _Scheiße_...that means I actually have to study for this crap."

"Exactly. Now hurry up and solve this equation, then graph it," Matthew directed, as Gilbert nodded.

**...**

"See? That test wasn't so hard, was it?" Matthew grinned.

Gilbert crossed his arms, sticking his tongue out at the Canadian, "You're just saying that because you didn't have to take it!"

"I made it myself... I had to answer all the questions to know they were right."

The albino gasped, "Why the fuck did you make it so damn challenging?"

Taking Gilbert's pale hand, Matthew laughed, "Relax, you got an eighteen out of twenty. It couldn't have been _that_ bad."

Lacing their fingers together, the couple walked back to their dorms, unaware of the other students who were exiting the other classroom.

They stopped, gaping at Matthew and Gilbert in disgust and horror. "What the fuck? The hell are you two fags doing?"

Gilbert pulled his hand away from Matthew quickly, "I don't know what the hell you're talking about," the albino growled.

Furrowing his brows, Matthew stared at his boyfriend with wide eyes. _What?_

"Pft. Whatever. Have fun sucking your boyfriend off, fucking freak," the nameless boys laughed, walking off with their tutors in tow.

* * *

><p><strong>;A;<strong>

That entire week, Matthew hardly spoke a word to Gilbert outside of the classroom. The albino's words had struck him hard, and it was almost the end of the summer. How did he know it wasn't just a summer fling?

"So, what did one saggy tit say to the other saggy tit?" Gilbert asked, smiling. "If we don't get some support soon, people will think we're nuts!"

Gilbert made an impoverished attempt of humor to make Matthew crack a smile, which failed miserably. Matthew stared at the wall, unable to speak to his boyfriend. He was so perplexed by Gilbert's behavior.

"Mattie..." he sat next to the blond, placing his hand over the Canadian's, "I know you're mad at me for what I did, but what else was I suppose to say? They would have ridiculed us even more if they found out what kind of relationship we're in."

Violet bored into crimson, as Matthew began to frown, "Are you sure Gil? Are you sure that's why you said that? I don't care about the name calling or the mortification I feel when people trash talk me. The only thing I care about is being able to be with you openly. If you really cared, you would have stood up for us, but you didn't. You're obviously _ashamed_ to call me your boyfriend."

"I'm not. I just didn't want you to feel targeted by meaningless bullies. I didn't realize how you felt about this."

Avoiding the albino's gaze, Matthew sighed, "It's fine."

Smiling, Gilbert hugged the small-framed blond, "Good, let's just forget that it happened, _ja_?"

**...**

"He actually had the nerve to ask you to forget about something _that_ important? Did he even apologize?" Nikolai scoffed, "What a douche!"

Matthew pulled his knees up against his chest. "It's alright. I know that's how Gilbert is, and I accept it."

"You're too nice."

Their boyfriends had gone to see their counselors to talk about their test scores, and keep track of their progress. It was a weekly thing that all students had to deal with, while the tutors could hand around for an hour.

"Nikolai, how come you never go to your counselor?" Matthew asked, "Aren't you a student?"

Raising an eyebrow, the Norwegian responded, "Do I seem stupid to you? I'm a tutor as well."

Making an 'o' shape with his mouth, the Canadian asked, "How are you and Matthias?"

Nikolai blushed, "We're good. A bit worried about Family Visitation Day though."

"F-Family Visitation Day?"

"Yup. Your parents or (whoever's at your house) should have gotten a letter some time ago, saying that they could visit for a day to see how you're doing. Just to check up on you. Matthias and I are planning on coming out to our parents."

Covering his mouth with a hand, Matthew wondered, "Do you think your parents will be fine with it?"

"Oh of course. My parents are pretty liberal. I more worried for Matthias...He told me about his parents, and how they're a bit on the homophobic side. I don't really know how they'll take it," he said in a melancholic tone.

"Good luck," Matthew said with a smile, "I'm sure things will be fine."

Nikolai nodded a thanks, "I better go. I have to start typing up Matthias' final test for his English class."

**...**

Matthew was definitely confused about what to do with Gilbert. He was about to do the incredible.

Reaching for his phone, he pressed a button, speed dialing someone very important.

_**"Matthew! I like, totally miss you! Europe is like, so fabulous! So much better than that dump we live in. Yuck! Oh God! I miss you so much! How's the all boy's school going for you? I bet you've already gotten with that German guy, huh?" **_

"Jesus! Feliks...one topic at a time please. I miss you too, um...I have a giant problem."

_**"What is it Matthew? Don't tell me you've gotten pregnant," **_Feliks warned.

Shaking his head, Matthew laughed, "No I haven't gotten pregnant. That's physically impossible."

**_"Doesn't mean you have to stop trying!" _**

"Okay, well... the German guy is now my boyfriend. I don't know if he really likes me, or if I'm just a summer fling, you know?"

_**"I feel ya hun. Mmmhm. I say you test his loyalty."**_

"What?"

_**"Dunno. But you gotta act fast. Summer's like, almost over girl. You gotta get your shit together, we're going to be juniors next year!"**_

"...Did you just call me 'girl'?"

_**"Kay Matthew, I gotta go do something. I'll talk to you next week! I'm coming back on August 13th, okay? Bye!" **_

Dial tone. Matthew smiled, laughing to himself. How he missed his best friend, it was incredible. But he had more important things to worry about at the moment. What if Gilbert's family was coming over for visitation day? Did Gilbert really like him enough to come out to his family about it?

Agitated by all of the questions running through his mind, he trudged back to his room.

* * *

><p><strong>Family Visitation Day! :Gilbert:<strong>

The day all the students were dreading has finally come into play. Families gathered around their loved ones, to scold them of course. Students everywhere were being scolded for either continuing to do horribly, or scolded for ending up at the academy in the first place.

Matthew only had one family member attend Visitation day. The last person the Canadian wanted there.

"MATTIE!" Alfred exclaimed, rushing up to his brother, tackling him to the floor of the hallways. Gilbert watched the scene unravel before him. Matthew's look-alike just tackled Matthew.

"U-Um..Gil, this is my twin brother, Alfred." Matthew introduced the two, trying to push his older brother off of him and get up from the ground.

Alfred narrowed his baby blue eyes at the albino, pulling his brother close to him. "Mattie, don't talk to him, he's obviously a vampire. I want you to go back to your dorm, and get some onions."

Gilbert bit back a laugh, watching the idiotic blond attempt to convince his boyfriend that he was a vampire.

"Al...Gilbert isn't a vampire. Trust me. And why would I get onions? _Garlic_. I think you meant garlic."

"You can never be so sure with these creatures," Alfred claimed.

Disregarding the obnoxious American teen beside them, Matthew asked Gilbert where his family was.

"Oh, I think they're over there somewhere. Wanna come look for them with me?"

"I have nothing better to do, so sure." Matthew latched onto Gilbert (much to Alfred's discomfort).

The blond haired American yelled, "Hey! I'm the Hero! Get away from my little brother, you vampire!"

**...**

Matthew was introduced to Gilbert's parents as, "Matthew, my **tutor**. He's a good **friend**. He always **helps** me with my **homework**, and my **grades** are above average because of him."

All the words that were said seemed to sting Matthew's heart.

They nodded in approval, and decided to take the tour around campus with all the other parents.

"Well, that went well," Gilbert said with an exasperated sigh.

Matthew nodded quietly, looking around to find Nikolai and Matthias' parents.

Once he spotted them, he noticed Nikolai talking to his parents, holding onto Matthias' hand tightly. His parents were smiling brightly down at their son. They all hugged him, including Matthias.

Then, Matthew watched as another married couple walked up to them. They began yelling at Matthias.

Matthew's brows knitted together, as he breathed out, "No..." His violet eyes watched as Matthias' dad raised a hand at his son, bringing it down on his cheek, harshly.

Nikolai's parents screamed at Matthias' father, as Nikolai held Matthias' body tightly.

The Dane's mother broke the two apart, then dragged the tall Dane away from him.

The Norwegian began to cry out his lover's name, which flipped the Dane's switch. He escaped from his mother's grip and rushed back to Nikolai, taking the hits from his father, who ignored the Norwegian couple all together.

Matthew could hardly take it, he wanted to rush over and intervene, but his body refused to let him.

**...**

Alfred, Matthew, Gilbert, Nikolai, and Matthias were sitting in room 69, sulking away.

"What the fuck just happened?" Alfred asked, seriously.

"I don't even know man. So unawesome," Gilbert said, placing a hand on Mattie's shoulder.

Nikolai sobbed quietly into Matthias' shoulder. The Dane stayed silent, wincing when Nikolai pressed up against one of the gashes or bruises his father gave him.

"What are we going to do? They want you to leave..." Nikolai asked his Danish lover.

"I'm staying. I need the credits anyways. They can't take my education away from me. They can't take me away from you either."

**...**

Leaving room 69, to give Matthias and Nikolai a bit of privacy, the trio headed back to Matthew and Gilbert's dorm.

The night ended when Alfred decided to stay at the academy for the rest of the summer.

"What? Why? How are you even going to stay here?" Matthew asked.

"I'm going to become a counselor. I saw a really hot British one earlier during the presentation. Oh my God, Mattie... his fucking accent..."

"Ew," Matthew commented dryly.

Rolling his eyes, Alfred said, "Yeah mhm. Say all you want. But you can;t deny your thing for _German_ accents."

Gilbert seemed to perk up at this, sending Matthew a questioning look.

The Canadian blushed, "Shut. Up. Alfred."

"I'll be staying with the British dude, since he doesn't have a roommate! See you guys later!" Alfred said with a wink.

Gilbert had heard what Alfred had blurted out, and of course, brought it up the second the American left. "German accents? You like them?" he smiled sinisterly.

Matthew blushed, "W-Well...y-yeah..."

"Hmm..." Gilbert pushed Matthew against a wall lightly, moving his lips to brush against the sensitive skin of Matthew's neck.

**...**

Somewhere along the way, Gilbert had convinced the blond to move onto the bed and continue where they left off.

The albino's tongue slithered into Matthew's mouth, probing every inch of him.

His pale hands were fumbling with the button on the Canadian's jeans, which jolted the blond.

"W-What? A-Are we going that far...?" Matthew asked innocently, with worry in his eyes.

Gilbert licked his lips, "I want to."

Biting his lower lip, Matthew noticed the look of lust in the Prussian's eyes, and just nodded, allowing the albino to do whatever he wanted with him.

Slipping his pants off, Gilbert felt the outline of Matthew's half-erect cock poking against his chest.

He licked Matthew's nipple, making the Canadian whimper.

Slowly snaking a hand into Matthew's boxers, he watched the reaction Matthew was giving him. His eyes were shut tightly, and his face was tinted completely pink.

Gilbert pulled Matthew's boxers off completely, as Matthew shivered.

The albino's lips ghosted over the blond's cock, as the Canadian bit back a low, sultry moan.

He licked Matthew from the base of his penis all the way to the tip, covering his shaft with saliva.

The Canadian's breath was getting shorter, when Gilbert took him inside his mouth completely, bobbing his head up and down unskillfully. Gilbert cupped his boyfriend, while moving his head up and down faster.

Coming close to his climax_, _Matthew knew he had to say something to the Prussian. He felt his release build up in the pit of his stomach. Gilbert popped himself off of the blond, before he came.

"G-Gil...I-I love you..."

Of course the albino man was happy with his boyfriend's statement, but he did not yet realize how strong his own feelings were yet. Those feelings were buried deep under his lust and drive for sex.

"I love you too Mattie," the albino lied, not feeling an ounce of remorse.

The two lay on their bed in the most awkward silence they'd ever experienced.

* * *

><p><strong>The Last Week<br>**

After that fateful night, Gilbert never once dared to look at Matthew. The guilt was eating away at him. He lied to his boyfriend. He honestly didn't even know his own feelings anymore. He was frightened by commitment and change.

There were only two more days left of summer school, and he wanted his relationship with the Canadian to last. He wanted it to last a long time.

Though he wanted such a thing to happen, he knew deep down that he'd end up hurting the blond.

His classes were ending, and the school was more focused on the fun parts of summer school. The counselors, supervisors and tutors were hosting a school picnic in the park across the street from the academy, and they had the school charity event left.

He had that short amount of time to talk to Matthew.

**:Mattie:**

The malicious gossip floating around the entire school was driving Matthew insane.

Everyone had heard about him and Gilbert, and the albino wasn't denying it any longer. Maybe Gilbert was right, what if it were easier if they hid in the closet?

No. He wouldn't let any of those stupid homophobes have the satisfaction of being right. And he most certainly would not let Gilbert rub it in his face. They were having enough trouble as it was.

Matthew was headed towards the counseling office, when he heard a couple of kids yelling around the corner of the Science building.

He peeked over to see what the ruckus was about, to see his boyfriend being cornered by a bunch of idiotic failures.

Right when he was about to go help his boyfriend, he actually listened to what the people were slowly walked towards the area they were in.

"You and your boy toy were going hot and heavy last week, huh? Did ya ream him hard, or what?" One of the guys asked Gilbert.

The albino kept quiet.

"What's the matter?" the 'leader' of the group began, "Awuh! The pansy loves him too much to admit what he did!"

"I don't love him," Gilbert admitted to one of his peers, in a simple statement, "he's annoying and too shy. I just wanted him to suck me off. That's all."

The Canadian paused in his tracks, his heart stopping, as ran towards the albino teen.

"Oh...shit. Mattie! I-I..." Gilbert stuttered with wide eyes.

Matthew shook angrily, clenching his knuckles until they turned ghost white.

"_Ach mein Gott_...I can explain!"

Within seconds, Matthew kneed the albino in the stomach, then punched him square in the jaw.

"Too annoying? Too shy? You're fucking pathetic, you fucking obnoxious piece of shit!" Matthew screamed at the top of his lungs, tears streaming down his face.

The boys who had been picking on them backed away, scared shitless by the darker side of the Canadian.

Matthew was officially fed up with everyone's bullshit.

* * *

><p><strong> :Gilbert:<strong>

After the whole fiasco, Matthew darted away. Even when the albino went back to their dorm room, all of his stuff was gone. Gilbert crawled into bed and just sprawled himself out on the mattress, wondering if he'd ever see Matthew again, or what he would _do_ if he _did_ see the Canadian again.

**...**

The bus ride back to the student's houses was silent and filled with depression and heartbreak.

Before Gilbert got off, he asked Reese, "What happened to Matthew?"**  
><strong>

"Gil, whatever the hell you did...you fucked up," Reese criticized, sounding more than disappointed.

The albino's heart cracked in two.

Reese was right.

He probably ruined his chance for good, "Do you know how he left?"

"I drove him home."

Crimson eyes widened, he felt so betrayed. "Couldn't you have convinced him to stay?"

"Why on Earth would I do that? You had a chance Gilbert. You messed him up pretty badly man. If I were him, I would have pinned you to the bed, and cut your penis—"

"If you ever happen to see him...tell him I'm sorry for everything," he said, with watery eyes.

Reese stayed silent, before nodding and opening the door for him.

"Bye Gil."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: (: OH hi there. Long time no update huh? ^^" Hey...I like DenNor. c: HOPE YOU LIKED THIS CHAPTER! It took a long ass time, and I'm sorry! ;A; Special Thanks to ** **TechnoGlitterExWhimsicalFairy and OwlinAMinor. c: They're the ones who put up with my stupidity, and I love them both.**

**HEY Jessica! *HEART* YOU ARE MY SUNSHINE! ;D **

**Translations: **

**(HAH! I DIDN'T NEED GOOGLE TRANSLATE! I have my mom. LOL)**

**Tagalog (Filipino)- _anak_: **Son.

**German: _Wunderbar: _**Wonderful.**  
><strong>


	15. HOLY REVIVED

**A/N: **To all my reviewers: You guys make my days worthwhile and bring smiles to my face. I love every single one of you, and I'm happy to tell you that this it was all of you who revived this story. You guys are the greatest things ever, no doubt about it. Your kind words helped me through some tough times regarding my family matters and high school bullshit. So without further ado, I bring you chapter fifteen of How To Lose Your Virginity. (: **P.S. WARNING****: DARK!SPAIN IS PRESENT IN THIS CHAPTER HO SHIIITTT WATCH THE HELL OUT.**

**-Miggery**

* * *

><p><strong>The Assault Revived<strong>

A rush of icy cold wind crashed against the albino man like a brick. He tossed his arms around his waist, hugging himself in attempt to keep the warmth from

escaping his body. He glared over at the blond Polish man, who at the moment was busy trying to break into a certain angry Italian man's home.

The Prussian was growing impatient, he had been waiting behind an itchy shrub for almost three hours. The shrub was definitely rubbing against him in the

wrong way, if you're catching my drift. Currently, Feliks, Matthew, and him were stuck outside of Lovino's house, trying to break in. It had been three hours since

the flight to Milan was "delayed", and Lovino and Antonio had been missing for a while. It was Feliks' idea to try and break into the Vargas home, despite Matthew's pleas to find a simpler way to figure out where the Italian and Spaniard had disappeared to.

Feliks' simple reply was, "_Like, no. This is way more fun than just waiting until __they call us back. And hopefully we'll like, walk in on them boning each other. Seriously _

_Matthew, you are just so new to this. But it's totally cute. That's totally what a__virgin would say!" _

Feliks' plan was for him to completely break the lock off of Lovino's front door, while Matthew scoped the back of the house for another entrance. Matthew was

not heard from, so Gilbert was laying low until the crazy tranny cracked the lock.

So there they were.

Biting his lip, Gilbert turned his walkie-talkie on, speaking into it with a low whisper, "Feliks, are you almost done? My balls are about to freeze off!" There was

absolutely no purpose of the trio bringing walkie-talkies. They were more of a nuisance if anything, but Gilbert said that they made them look way 'awesomer',

_therefore_ Matthew reluctantly agreed to let his boyfriend bring them.

His walkie-talkie beeped before he heard the sarcasm laced in the Pole's voice, "Oh my God, Gilbert. Shut. Up. I'm like, trying to concentrate here! And stop using

the walkie-talkie when you're like ten feet away from me! Just talk normally, you freak!"

He scoffed, deciding to talk to Matthew instead, "Hey pancake," he smiled, proud that he thought of a devilishly cute nickname for his boyfriend, "See anything on

the _dark_ side?"

With a soft stutter, the violet-eyed teen replied, "G-Gilbert, Feliks is trying to concentrate, so don't use the walkie-talkie too much."

"Oh my God! Aw, that was totally cute Mattie! He called you a panca—" Gilbert disconnected Feliks' walkie-talkie from the system he had brought along with him.

Smirking, he bellowed into his fine piece of technology, "Feliks is no longer a problem Mattie. Do you see anything?"

"Dim lights on the second floor. And you better reconnect Feliks! We need to find out if he broke the lock," he scolded.

Gilbert sighed, abiding by Matthew's words. To his surprise, Feliks was still ranting, unaware that he had even been disconnected from their conversation to begin with.

"—nd when you two get married, you can name her Maple. If Matthew chooses not to get an abortion," Feliks concluded."

Raising an eyebrow, Gilbert said, "Okay... Are you done with the lock?"

"Negatory."

"What? You've been there forever! What the hell have you been doing? _Masturbating_?"

The albino heard Feliks' eyes roll, "I only masturbated twice since we've been here, so shut up. The bolts aren't coming loose. There's like, ice inside the keyhole.

Maybe I should blow on it?" he paused, and then giggled, "Wow, that sounded super kinky! 'Kay, but really. I don't know how to open this shit. Our best bet is if

we break a window and like, climb inside or something."

Face-palming, Gilbert rose from the shrub he was sitting against, and trudged over to Feliks. Dropping his walkie-talkie next to the green-eyed monster, he

demanded, "Let me have your wrench."

"Like, Gilbert. I would never do anything that sick and nasty with you. Matthew is my best friend! How could you even think I'd—" He jested, but was cut off when

he heard Gilbert growl.

What the fuck.

"You know what I mean Feliks. Stop joking around," his voice was serious and controlling, which frightened the Pole in the slightest bit. Which was odd, Feliks

killed people for a living. How could he be scared of a sexy albino like Gilbert?

Feliks' expression hardened, as he handed Gilbert the heavy piece of metal, worried about what his friend would use it for. Gilbert made his way to the back of

the house, in search of Matthew.

**;-A-;**

Matthew was up in a tree. Binoculars hung loosely from his neck, and he squinted to peek through them in order to see further through the window. "Hey there,"

Gilbert chimed from the ground, "are they alive?"

Flinching, the Canadian pouted, "Gilbert, don't say that."

Gilbert gulped, "...I've called Antonio at least ten times, I can't help it. I'm worried for him."

The blond looked down at him, "We'll figure out where they are. I promise," he stated gingerly.

He nodded, "What do you see exactly?"

"Not much," Matthew shrugged, watching as the albino made a valiant attempt to climb up the tree that Matthew was so naturally perched upon. He fell into the

dirt.

"How in the name of God did you manage to climb up there?" Gilbert questioned.

"I d-don't know? I just did it."

"Okay, motherfuckin' Katniss Everdeen," he mumbled under his breath, "here's what you need to do; break that window and jump inside it. Then when you get

inside, go downstairs and open the door for Feliks and I."

Matthew tossed him a blank stare. "Really, Gilbert? Really? You expect me to go to the edge of this branch, and break the _glass_ window? Really? I hope you know

that kind of stuff only happens in movies."

"I'll toss you the wrench, then you can throw it at the window super amazingly hard, then it will break, and you can jump in."

Matthew opened his mouth to retort, but closed it. Then he cursed loudly, "_C'est des conneries. _Gilbert, that's not going to work, and what happens if I fall?"

"I'll catch you," he replied. Rolling his eyes, Matthew agreed to the idea, "I'll throw the wrench, and be sure to catch it. And chuck it hard, Mattie! Use your hockey hand! Or your jerking-off hand... wait, that's my hand's job! Hah!"

The violet-eyed teen shook his head, and proceeded to move towards the edge of the thick branch, balancing on his knees as he paced his way to the thinning

edge. His breathing hastened, and he glanced down at his boyfriend, "Gil, I don't know if I can do this," he panicked.

"Pancake, you got this. Trust me." Gilbert quickly changed his mind, "On second thought, never trust me. I'm awesome, but that doesn't mean my judgement is

the greatest. I know you can do it though!"

"How reassuring..." Tossed up in the air, Matthew flailed his arms in attempt to grab the hunk of metal.

Surprisingly, it was a success. Even though it made absolutely no sense at all. He cautiously moved toward the very ledge of the tree branch, and chucked it at

the window about four feet in front of him, breaking the glass entirely. "Okay, how...h-how did that even...w-work?" Matthew questions his strength

occasionally, which is a big mistake on his part. Hockey players are strong as fuck, okay? Don't mess with them, they are wild sexy beasts and will prey on the

weak. Anyway, Gilbert's mouth hung open in shock. Even he had underestimated the strength of his own lover.

"Do I just...jump though now?" Matthew called out, looking for guidance from the albino.

Snapped out of his reverie, he responded, "Uh, yeah. Is the hole large enough for you to thrust your body into? I mean, is it well prepared? Maybe we should slap some Vaseline over you to m-make you slide in the hole easier—"

"_Mon dieu_! Just stop with the sexual innuendos, and tell me what to do!"

Gilbert choked back a laugh, and with as shrug he jested, "Whatever your heart tells you."

Before jumping into the house, he clearly made his middle finger visible to the man who stole his heart.

That is true love.

* * *

><p><strong>Lovino<strong>

_I cannot believe I did it. I just topped the man of my dreams, holy Hell. _The Italian's bare body was pressed up against the Spaniard, panting slightly with an entirely flushed face.

Antonio was still attempting to compute what had just occurred.

Lovino _topped_ him.

Do you know what that means?

_Antonio_ will be the one carrying their mythical man-child.

That's right.

Lovino kissed his lover's cheek, "_Ti amo_, Antonio." Besides his moans, the Spaniard had been completely quiet during their stay with each other.

Antonio's voice was hard and unwavering, as if he were scolding the younger Italian, "Are you really leaving me like this, Lovino? I knew you were cruel, but this is just..." though his eyes betrayed his voice. They were filled with pain, and frustration, "...brutal."

Furrowing his brows, Lovino sighed, "Well what other choice do you leave me with? After tonight, you'll probably arrest me and I'll be in jail for a long ass time."

"I would _never_ betray you that way. I'm not like you Lovino. I would never backstab the people I _love_."

Lovino flinched, "How did I do that exactly?" Antonio glared up at him, shaking his head.

"Did you really just ask me that. I'm in fucking love with you. You know that. You've known that for years, and yet," his eyes began to water, "you obviously

neglected to tell me that you were the mafia boss I've been looking for for years!"

Now he was pissed. How the hell was Lovino supposed to tell an FBI agent that he was a mafia boss who basically fucking runs the black market by selling nuclear weapons and narcotics? "You'd probably turn me in, that's why!"

"Lovino, shut the hell up. I'd fucking _die_ for you. Don't even pull that bullshit with me."

The amber-eyed man pushed himself off of Antonio's body, and stared at the wall in front of him. "I didn't want to ruin your career."

"Well, ain't that sweet, honey. Look at how fucking bleak my career's looking now," he barked angrily, "Lovino, I was fucked the moment I found out you were the

mafia boss." He bit his lip, then looked Lovino directly in his eyes, emerald met amber in a chaotic collision, "Back then in your little sex shop, I knew it was you. I

knew you were Romano. I just didn't want to believe it. I didn't want to believe that the man that I've fallen so hard for is my worst _enemy,_" his voice began to

crack, as he choked on his sobs.

Lovino bit back, "Now you know why I've been fucking trying to hide it from you!" Antonio sat up in the tangled sheets, hunched over and began to let his

emotions out. Lovino could have sworn he would have been drowned in the river of tears that spewed out of the Spaniard's eyes, but decided to comfort him

nonetheless. "Antonio, I didn't want you to know because I was scared. 'What if he doesn't like what I do?' I'd always ask myself that. What if you stopped loving

me because I do horrible things? I never wanted to fucking lose you. I just wanted you to love me for being...regular me."

Cloudy eyes narrowed at the Italian, "You want to know the worst part about all of this? Despite your lies, and learning that you're a fucking murderer who sells illegal narcotics to thousands of crazy buyers..." he took his lover's hands, "I realized that I don't give a fuck."

"Excuse me?" Lovino was slightly confused, and a bit hurt. Did his b-boyfriend just say that he didn't give a fuck about him. His heart stopped for a moment,

before Antonio continued.

"I don't give a fuck if you're a murderer or a drug dealer or a fucking _stripper_! I don't care! Lovino, I loved you ten years ago when we met in high school, I

loved you when I was whacked in the head by one of your henchmen, I loved you when I found out you were Romano, I love you so much right now, and I know

that every single moment of my life from this point on, I will always continue to love you."

Lovino moved closer to the Spaniard, once again pressing his lips against his lover's. His touch was gentle, as he rubbed Antonio's arm. Placing his chin on Antonio's shoulder blade, he mumbled over and over again, "I love you. So much that it hurts me."

They both hadn't spoken for a while, and just laid on Lovino's bed for a while, enraptured by just being with each other. Their bodies were tangled, and fits of giggles and laughter would occasionally slip from their mouths. "How'd your foot get there?"

"Dunno'."

"You're touching my butt, aren't you? Oh, wait. I'm touching my own butt. Nevermind."

"...What?"

"God, your churro is thick."

"I don't even know what you're saying anymore."

"Let's elope."

Antonio sat up quickly, "I literally do not even know what you're saying anymore, but I like it. Talk more. This side of you fucking is sexy."

Lovino wrapped his arms around Antonio's neck, placing light kisses on his cheek, before whispering into the Spaniard's ear, "Let's elope," he repeated slowly.

A low moan emitted from Antonio's lips, and hands were trailing lower and lower onto the Italian's backside, "Enlighten me on this topic please?"

With a smirk, Lovino moved his body so that he was completely straddling the Spaniard once again, "I mean, I'll move to Milan. And I'll kidnap you as well."

"Great, add more reasons to why you're on America's Most Wanted," Antonio jeered, then kissed Lovino's lips.

Lovino hummed, grinding his hips against the Spaniard's, "What do you say to that? Move to Italy and start completely new lives together? I'll teach you how to

make money with your body and we could—" He was shut up by Antonio.

"The only way I'd make money that way is if you were the buyer each and every time. Now get real. How the hell would we leave this place without getting caught?"

Laughing, Lovino smiled genuinely, "You really do underestimate me, Antonio."

"No, seriously. How?" He questioned with impeccable curiosity. He wanted to know how the mafia boss would escape the FBI. Even though he'd escaped the

grasp of the FBI countless times.

He was just curious.

"Just leave everything to me, I'll have everything we need," he stated, "but just to be clear, you're actually willing to come with me? You're willing to live in Italy...

with me?"

"Are my eyes green?"

"...Yes."

"That is my definite answer. Yes. Yes, Lovino, yes! Why would you even feel the need to ask me? Of course! Yes, duh. No shit I'm going Italy with you. I would go even if you _hadn't_ ask me."

Lovino's grip tightened, as he buried his face into the crane of Antonio's neck, "Good. I don't know what I'd do without you."

Running a hand through Lovino's hair, Antonio replied, "I don't know what I'd do without _you_," he paused, "this is corny, but you're all I have to live for."

Fuck that was corny. Corny as shit.

"Yeah that was really corny," Lovino laughed, holding onto his lover as if his life were hanging from a strand of thread.

"Oh, but we have to hold off the marriage."

Lovino looked him in the eyes, a bit disappointed, "Oh, okay. W-Whatever you want then."

Antonio's face was tinted pink, "No, no, _mi amor, _you misunderstand me. I just," he took lifted Lovino's chin, "I want to do everything right. We're only getting

married once, and I would never let us get married before I properly proposed to you."

Pink was present all over Lovino's face.

He was meant to be a blushing bride.

"A-Ah, you idiot! D-Don't say stupid shit like that!"

Pressing his forehead against Lovino's, Antonio said, "You are the most adorable and incredible thing that has popped up in my life. How did I even get so lucky to end up with you?"

_I should be the one saying that, idiot._

Lovino blushed even more profusely, "Do you even realize how corny you are? God... I'm not even great. I'm horrible. No one wants me. I wonder why you chose

me over my idiotic brother."

Antonio kissed his temple, then his nose, then his lips, and Lovino wished he could kiss every inch of his body every day, "Don't compare yourself to him. Just

don't, Lovino. You are my one and only, and I love you too much."

* * *

><p><strong>Matthew<strong>

"Okay, I am in the house, and I'm opening the front door for you guys now," Matthew spoke into the walkie-talkie. Who knew Gilbert's moronic plan would

actually work? Everyone had doubts, I know.

"Gilbert's plan worked?" Feliks asked shocked, as he stood up from sitting outside in front of the (now opened) door.

Gilbert came up from behind Feliks, "One-hundred percent, bitch. Let's go scope out this joint, ja?"

The trio made their way up the stairs and through the a couple of the bathrooms, before they arrived at the top floor where the room with the dimmed lights was.

Lovino's room.

The three of them were praying that the door wasn't locked.

Feliks reached out to open it, worried about what would lay ahead of them. Beyond the door.

"One..." Matthew counted uneasily, shutting his eyes tight.

"Two," Gilbert said, impatiently.

"CAT!" Feliks screamed, as he pried the door open.

* * *

><p><strong>Antonio<strong>

"So we're leaving now then?" Antonio asked excitedly, searching the room for his pants and other articles of clothing that were ripped off of his body.

Lovino nodded, "Yeah, and we better hurry. The jet might leave soon."

"We're not taking anything?"

The Italian walked up to his lover, and flicked his forehead, "We leave _everything_."

"And my stuff?"

Lovino raised a brow, "What do you not understand by, _everything_?"

"The '_everything'_ part," Antonio replied sarcastically.

"I told you I'll take care of you. I'll just buy you the shit you need when we get there."

Sighing, Antonio said, "As sweet as that is, I don't want you spending all your money on me."

"Shut up. And don't call me sweet or tell me what to do," Lovino smiled, "I'm kind of kidnapping you, remember?"

Antonio sat onto the bed, watching as Lovino stuffed a couple of things into a suitcase. "What about our friends?"

This subject made the Italian pause in his tracks, "I'm working on kidnapping them too. It might take a while. I still have to figure out how to smuggle ten

people out of the country."

"Why...are you planning on taking ten people out of the country? And who the hell are you even thinking of?"

"Well, my friends of course. Matthew, Feliks and Arthur. And Matthew will probably be sad without Gilbert. Feliks would murder me if I didn't bring Toris. That

eliminates five people," he counted on his fingers, "Matthew will also want is brother there. And you know how his brother gets if he doesn't have that Japanese

boy-toy of his around. Then of course, Arthur will want that perverted friend of yours there, Francis. Then I have to bring my brother and his wurst-loving bastard,

Ludwig."

"Oh, okay. That all makes sense."

Lovino pouted, "I just want everyone to be happy."

_God, so fucking cute. Oh my gosh... _"_Amor_, you can't bring everyone here. Well, you can, but we can't keep them here. We need alone time. And you know how

Feliks is with that camera of his."

Lovino's phone went off, and he looked down at it, "It's time. We gotta go," he said, taking Antonio's arm.

"Wait, just let me write someone a note...on your wall." Finding a pen in Italian's nightstand, the Spaniard scribbled a sentence in large, green letters. "There."

"Okay princess, you ready for this?" Lovino challenged.

Antonio nodded, grabbing onto Lovino's hand, as they both raced out the door. Lovino's light switch was actually capable of opening the door to his attic. That

was something. A ladder dropped down from the hole in the ceiling, and they began to climb.

* * *

><p><strong>Matthew<strong>

"What happened here?" Feliks questioned no one in particular.

The room was a complete war zone. A blood trail traced from the door to the bed. Picture frames were broken, the bed sheets were torn, handcuffs hung off the side of the bed, clothes were scattered all

across the floor, and drawers were open. It was messy, and completely unlike Lovino.

Gilbert shrugged, "'Dunno, but the giant green letters on the wall says it all, 'Don't Panic.'"

Matthew tossed his boyfriend a look, "Really? Your not worried at all? They could be killed! There's a trail of blood here!"

"Mattie. That is definitely Churro's handwriting. Don't even worry about it. He's got good judgement," Gilbert stretched his arms over his head, and yawned.

_Oh mon dieu, my boyfriend is a total moron._

_"_Matthew, I agree with Gilbert," Feliks began, "he has a lot of common sense. Out of all the people we know, he was the only one smart enough not to take part

in the competition," he spoke with ease.

Gilbert's eyes widened, and his jaw dropped.

"Competition? What competition?" Matthew asked with mild curiosity, as he inspected a drawer covered with papers and receipts."

Feliks caught his blunder, "O-Oh. Um. The national hot dog eating competition. Yeah, it was crazy, and everyone lost. Except Antonio. Because he didn't join."

Matthew stopped what he was doing, and gave Feliks a questioning gaze.

The Pole sent Gilbert a helpless look, asking him for assistance.

"Yeah, Mattie, it was pretty crazy. You should have been there."

Crossing his arms, Matthew leaned against the dresser, "Oh really? How come you never mentioned this before?"

"I was waiting for your..." Gilbert searched his head for the right word, "...approval." Close enough.

Matthew's eyes narrowed in suspicion, "Stop lying you two. What competition are you talking about?"

Feliks' cheeks puffed up, and he was beginning to become nervous. He was never capable of lying to his best friend about anything. He had to come clean.

"Matthew, I need to tell you something, but promise you won't be mad!"

"Feliks..." Matthew was irritated, which was never really a good thing.

Gilbert interrupted, "Feliks, please don't. Don't, please!" he begged for the Polish man not to rat him out. Matthew would never forgive him.

"I-I...made a competition, who was open to anyone we know. The main purpose of the competition is to woo and take your virginity...basically, the first person

who does that will receive one million dollars."

"_What_?" Matthew's voice was unbelieving, as he looked from Feliks to Gilbert.

The albino stood, looking ashamed.

"Oh my... Gilbert...you took part in this? His voice began to shake, and tears filled his violet eyes.

Gilbert's voice was instantly desperate, "No, Mattie, I swear I was not in it for the money! I swear, I just wanted to meet you again, and—"

"SHUT UP!" Matthew screamed, "I can't believe I fell for you again! How fucking stupid am I to actually believe that you...l-loved me._ Mon dieu_, I'm so stupid."

Darting out of the room, the Canadian ran down the stairs and out of the Vargas house completely. Gilbert and Feliks chased after him, catching up quickly.

"No, Matthew, please don't go! I'll explain myself I swear I wasn't even thinking about the competition when I was with you, you've got to believe me!" he pleaded, watching feebly as the blond got into his car.

"Matthew, don't leave me," his voice broke, "I love you so much, you can't do this to me again."

"You've lied to me before, and I won't have anymore of this bullshit Gilbert. How did you think I felt? This is like boarding school all fucking over again!" He screamed.

Gilbert had streams of tears dripping from his face, "But Mattie, I love you."

His voice was stone cold, as he scoffed, "I really wish I could say the same right now."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Oh. My. God. FUCKING SHOOT ME. GAHHH! wow. I FINISHED THIS, THEN THIS COMPUTER TURNED OFF. AND I HADN'T SAVED IT SO I HAD TO RE-TYPE HALF OF IT... HOLY SHIT. I BET THERE ARE TONS OF MISTAKES, BUT I DON'T EVEN CARE FUCK. IT IS 3:16 A.M. FUCK. I GO TO BED AT 9 P.M. EVERY DAY. IT IS WAY PAST MY USUAL SLEEPY TIME. WTF. okay, this proves how much I love you guys. I better be appreciated.**

**Anyways, I'm sorry for the fucking late-ass update... it's been...a year. (: Hahha I'm inspired by all of you reviewers. New and old. I love everyone of you, and you guys make my days worth living~ *hearts* This also made me remember how much I love writing fluffy PruCan and Spamano...Wow there's so much Spamano in this fic..WOW. LOLOLOLOL. Kay, well yeah. (: I'm uploading another Spamano fic. It;s Gakuen!Hetalia, so yeah it should be pppreeettyyy fun!(:**

**Oh and a little newsflash, my friend and I are doing a couple of Homestuck fics for Gamzee X Karkat and JohnDave so yuppp if you ship any of these two pairings, you know to look up CaptainButts. We made it strictly for Homestuck fics though, so be warned! Nothing is updated yet, but we are working on some pretty amazing shit. c: Hope you enjoyed tonight's update! PLEASE REVIEW HOLY MY GOSH. I SPENT LIKE 8 HOURS CRANKING THIS UGLY PIECE OF TRASH UP. kay love you all! Good night America~**


	16. This is it

**A/N: Hi, it's been forever. Wow, HAVE I CHANGED. Let me tell you how done I am. c: Hahahha I hope you all enjoy the last chapter of this dang story aight!**

**ATTENTION: CHAPTER 15 IS UP, GO BACK AND READ IT. (: THAT IS ALL. (I received a message from guest user: Holy Fudge, saying that it hadn't been alerted or sent to your e-mails so yep!)**

* * *

><p><strong>Matthew Williams<strong>

Matthew Williams had been sitting in his room for the past two weeks, neglecting his cell phone and constant knocks on his apartment door. It was

expected of him, considering the fact that the person he loved had yet again broken his trust. He didn't even know if said person had reciprocated

feelings for him, he was probably just using him for the money that Feliks had promised. That's the other thing; his best friend was a busybody

who did not know exactly how to quit meddling in his affairs.

His life was officially horrible.

Jobless, friendless, loveless, and probably soon to be homeless.

The past weeks had definitely been hard. He struggled to keep himself from grabbing his cellphone to call Gilbert and beg the albino to take him

back.

Despite the temptation, he'd always put his phone down at the very last minute, telling himself it would be a pathetic thing to do.

That's what he thought he was.

_ Pathetic_.

Feliks had to fucking buy people into loving him.

How fucking bad was that?

He sighed, moving like molasses from his bed to his computer to search for job applications online.

Recently, he had been looking to start fresh, and go to college before he turned twenty in a couple of weeks.

Shit, he remembered that he was almost twenty.

Twenty.

Two.

Zero.

_Fuck, I'm getting old. _

The wavy-haired blondsat in silence, gaping at the university campus he was supposed to be at, but didn't have the money for.

Through the internet, he stared wistfully at its perfect campus, _I should be there. I have to be there. If I were there now I wouldn't have to deal with _

_my boyfriend's __bullshit anymore._

He minimized the window he had open, and narrowed his eyes at his screensaver. It was a picture of Gilbert kissing Matthew's cheek.

_Ex-boyfriend. _

Reopening the window, he checked the tuition fees over one more time, and then recalculated how much money he'd need to finally be able to pay

for the expenses, _Just about fifty million gazillion bajillion dollars short. Great._

Ever since Matthew was old enough to understand reason, he was always interested in airplanes. Originally, his plan was to attend the University

of Toronto.

Though he worked his ass off throughout high school, the partial scholarship he received just wasn't enough to support him in an entirely different

country. Which is how he ended up working for Lovino at the sex shop. Lovino payed him well, and even helped him out when he was swamped in

expenses from his apartment.

_Lovino,_ he thought, _where are you?_

* * *

><p><strong>Lovino Vargas<strong>_  
><em>

"Tell me," Lovino smiled as he pressed a camera into a certain Spaniard's face, "how much do you love to breathe this Italian air?"

Antonio's own teeth flashed back at his boyfriend, "It's my second favorite thing in the world."

The Italian turned the camera towards him, and smirked while he recorded the video, "Yeah, bitches. That's right. I'm his _first_ favorite thing, so you

can all just pack your damn bags and go home, alright?"

Lovino could hear Antonio's deep laugh in the background, as they entered their new house together.

Sliding over to his boyfriend, he swung the camera over his shoulders so that it could capture every part of the house.

"Yes, this is our amazing Italian home," he paused to look into the camera, "I know you're all jealous. Bitches, this shit is from fucking Tuscany, okay? We got some real vintage shit all up in this bitch."

Pausing the video, he watched as Antonio gathered all their boxes and suitcases from the car and moved them into their home.

Though most of their furniture had already been placed inside the house hours before the duo had even arrived in Italy.

Lovino made sure of it.

Or at least, Romano made sure his henchmen broke a sweat and got their asses to work.

He couldn't help but feel slightly giddy.

This was his dream.

He was about to live his fucking dream. Tearing up, he took a look around his extravagant home.

It was a commodious place and it had everything they could possibly need plus more.

He eyes their spacious kitchen which was big enough for he and Antonio to cook a full-blown feast.

Eyeing the spiral staircase, he grew curious as to what the rooms looked like. Each step he took only made him more anxious.

When he reached the top step, he immediately saw one of the guest rooms, which had no door. The room was vast, and had a perfect view of the

ocean. Lovino gasped, as he raced to the window. "Fuck! I love Italy!" He screamed, as he burst into a fit of giggles. Covering his mouth, he fell

onto the floor and drew his knees to his chest, hugging them tightly, "How the hell is this even real?"

"Don't really know exactly, but I'm assuming this is only the beginning of our happiness," Antonio chimed from the doorway.

It was perfect for the two.

The emerald-eyed man leaning against the doorway, looking out a window which revealed the beautiful Italian seas.

Waves crashed upon the beach, and for a moment, all was silent as they listened.

Perfection.

Breaking the silence, Antonio asked in a soft voice that rivaled a whisper, "Where are we exactly?"

"Santa Marinella, about an hour away from Rome."

Moving from his place next to the door, the Spaniard sat down next to his boyfriend, "Amazing," he said unbelieving.

Leaning on Antonio's shoulder, Lovino let a content sigh escape from his lips, "I know," but he stood up, "now let's go check out the other rooms."

**~0~**

While adventuring around their house, the couple discovered a few interesting things. It had five ginormous bedrooms, and six ginormous

bathrooms.

They totally could have brought along ten people!

The master bedroom, however, was the most marvelous of all. They could probably survive a zombie apocalypse in that room. Like most of the

other rooms, they had an excellent view of the mighty blue ocean, as well as a bathroom embedded with white granite and a fine bathtub and shower.

Their bed was a fucking masterpiece.

Sleeping on it would be like sleeping on fucking clouds.

Massive was what you could describe their television. Because the moment you walk into their room, it's like: BOOM. Right in your fucking face.

"H-How do you like it?" Lovino asked, facing Antonio, whose hand was currently pressed against the white granite top of the sink.

The Spaniard's head whipped up to look at Lovino. His eyes were wider than a deer's caught in headlights. He reminded the Italian of a little boy in

a candy shop, who had just been told he could get as much candy as he wanted. "Everything. Is. Shiny."

Lovino gulped, "Do you want to go back to LA?" As strange as it was, the hazelnut-haired man was frightened that his boyfriend would somehow hate it, and end up missing his old home instead.

Antonio's eye visibly twitched as he walked up to Lovino, gripping him by the shoulders and shook his entire body.

He mumbled something along the lines of, "Hasjhdjkjasdjaah."

"...What?"

Instead of using words Antonio answered him with one simple mindbogglingly perfect kiss.

_Perfect._

After parting, they both panted for a moment, before Antonio laid his head on Lovino's shoulder, "God Lovi, do you even understand how much I

love you? I mean, I _really_ love you. After going through all this shit with you... I don't think I'll ever be able to leave your side for more than an

hour."

Slowly, Lovino's hands slithered under Antonio's shirt, "You're driving me crazy here," he whispered.

Antonio's eyes lit up, "You've been driving me crazy for years, so I guess this is just payback."

Lovino froze, eyes remaining on the oblivious Spaniard. Antonio kissed his neck, then proceeded to lift the Italian up off his feet and onto the bed.

"The bed...? R-Really?"

With a chuckle and a light shrug, Antonio responded, "Why not? It feels like clouds," he smiled.

Though Lovino didn't smile back.

In fact, his head was turned to avoid his lover's face.

Antonio caught on, and cocked his head to one side, "What's wrong?" concern was clearly present in his voice.

Refusing to meet his gaze, Lovino continued to stare out the window, regardless of his boyfriend hovering over his body.

Puffing up his cheeks, Antonio let out a long breath, "Lovino, don't make me bring out the..._tickle_ monster."

Oh shit bro, anything but that.

This certainly did help break Lovino's angry façade, because his eyes widened immensely, and a giant smiled was plastered on his face as he

yelled, "DON'T!"

Antonio's eyes met Lovino's and they both began to giggle.

Kissing Lovino's nose, he asked, "What's on your mind?"

Furrowed brows were a common sign of Lovino's unhappiness, "It's..." he opened his mouth, then closed it, and then opened it again. But he ended up pressing his palms against his eyelids and sighed.

Silence.

"It's...?" Antonio urged.

Biting his lip, the Italian finally mustered up the courage to ask his lover, "How did you fall in love with me exactly?"

This caused a bit of surprise from the Spaniard, but a wide grin as well. "You want to know? It's a long story."

"Antonio," he reached up to pull his lover's face down to his and kissed him chastely, "we've got all the fucking time in the world."

* * *

><p><strong>Matthew Williams<strong>

Matthew's life was at an all-time low. Well, it could be a lot worse, but he was feeling pretty glum.

After applying job after job, he finally landed a part-time gig as a teacher's assistant at a pre-school. It hardly paid anything, but it totally beat all

the other shady jobs people were offering.

On Craig's List, someone offered to pay him one-hundred bucks to be their personal body pillow.

Like, what the fuck?

He sighed, after another pre-schooler spilled orange juice all over their nap time mattress.

"I'm sorry," a little brunette boy's lip quivered, as he gave Matthew giant, watery, puppy-dog eyes.

Matthew could have sworn that his heart melted, "It's alright Joshua, just take your nap."

The little boy fumbled around on his mattress for a second, before sitting up, "Read me a story."

The Canadian laughed, "We already did Story Time, buddy. Just go to sleep."

Joshua huffed, but agreed.

Rolling his eyes, he made his way to the teacher's desk. The nameplate read: Mrs. Karpusi.

Yes, it was Heracles' mother, she taught pre-school.

"You're so darling, Matthew and the children just love you."

Smiling, Matthew replied, "Well, it makes sense. I love the children."

They made quick small talk for a moment, until Mrs. Karpusi said, "Yes, and Matthew...I have some news for you."

"Yes, what is it?"

"You're fired," she said with a smile.

Though Matthew Williams was not smiling. His smile had completely fallen right off of his face.

"...What? Didn't you just get done telling me how much the children love me?" he asked in a desperate voice.

This was his chance.

This was the only way he could afford to pay for his education.

Fuck, beside the fact that there were hundreds of other jobs available to him.

But he liked this job.

It was fun.

The Grecian woman shrugged, "Let's just say you're overqualified. Matthew, you are afraid. There are way more jobs out there suitable for you.

You're wasting your time here, I mean, c'mon. Your pay is little to nothing."

His mouth twitched, "B-But what about the _children_?" he clasped his chest dramatically, doing absolutely nothing to help his cause.

She shook her head, "You're not meant to be here. For God's sake! You were _supposed_ to be an aerospace engineer, Matthew. How'd you wind up

in this place?"

His mouth shriveled up into a thin line, "Things happened. This was my only way to pay for my university's tuition."

"There's always more than one side to a story, hun. And the side you're telling me is a little less than honest."

Matthew was shocked, but he understood where Mrs. Karpusi was coming from.

He hung his head in shame, as he walked out the double-doors of the pre-school for the last time.

He'd only been working there for two damn weeks.

When he arrived at his car, he could feel something was different. Just, nothing was right. Cautiously, he moved into the driver's seat, turning on

his five year old Camry.

Yeah.

Something was definitely wrong about this picture.

Matthew shut his eyes, and swallowed hard.

Sitting behind him was a man holding a nine-millimeter handgun.

"_Fuck_!" The masked man cursed lightly, "I'm not going to kill you, I just want you to_ fucking_ drive!"

Startled, the blond simply nodded, zooming out of the school parking lot, attempting to keep his eyes focused on the road, and away from the

psychopathic man with a gun in his hands in the rear-view mirror.

"W-Where do I drive you to?" Matthew asked, trying not to sound as frightened as he was.

The psychopath pressed the gun to the back of Matthew's head, and whispered, "Your usual hangout spot."

Matthew's eyes widened, as sweat began to trickle down his face, "H-How d-do you know—"

"Shut the fuck up and drive," he spat out, grinding the gun against his skull.

With a small whimper, Matthew only gave the man a light nod, before driving to the spot where all his "acquaintances" smoked, drank, and got

high.

**~0~**

They stopped in front of the house, and Matthew unbuckled his seat belt, but was stopped when the stranger pulled out a blindfold.

He tied it over Matthew's violet eyes, and stepped out of the door, slamming his shut, then made his way to Matthew's door, pulling the Canadian

by his hair.

"_Ouch_!" Matthew yelped, and in turn got a mouth full of metal.

The kidnapper pulled Matthew's face close to his, and whispered, "One more word, or noise out of you, and I will _pull_ this goddamn trigger,

alright?"

The Canadian was silenced, and too alarmed to make any indication that he understood.

But the kidnapper continued onto the door anyway, opening it without a problem.

With his eyes covered, Matthew had no idea what was going on.

The house was completely silenced.

It was never quiet there.

Matthew was escorted to the center of one of the houses many rooms, specifically the one where everyone usually chilled at.

It was there zone, their sanctuary.

_Ugh_, the Canadian thought, _if I make it out alive, the guys will never let me live this down._

But then he started to wonder about his chances of survival, which were looking pretty slim right now.

He was being tied to a chair with rope that burned his skin as it rubbed back and forth against his hands.

He attempted to make space for his hands to slip through while he was being bound to the chair, but it was no use.

The kidnapper tied him so tight to the point where his hands began to feel numb.

"Should I do it now?" The kidnappers voice was husky, and deep.

Unrecognizable almost.

Almost.

_Is...that...? Feliks? _

"Feliks?" Matthew took a chance. Either it was Feliks, or he was going to have a bullet in his brain.

Sweat poured down his face like fucking Niagara Falls.

There was long silence.

"HOW THE FUCK DID YOU KNOW?" Came the response.

The Canadian sighed in relief, "_Mon dieu, _you really had me scared for a moment there," he laughed nervously, "now," his voice was sweet, then

this happened, "UNTIE ME SO I CAN KICK YOUR FUCKING ASS!" He wiggled around in his chair, making it hop up a bit.

"Whoa, we've got a badass over here," Feliks jested, chuckling to himself.

Matthew huffed, blowing hair out of his face, "Feliks, seriously, take all this crap off of me and explain why you did this."

"No can do, kiddo." The room suddenly wreaked of a blend of tobacco and marijuana.

"I hate you so much you have no idea. And why are you talking like this?"

Practically hearing the smirk on Feliks' face, Matthew's breath began to hasten.

_Holy shit, my best friend is going to kill me. I know this voice. It's his 'killing' voice, oh my sweet baby Jesus. I'm about to be slaughtered by my best _

_friend._

"Like, my God Matthew, you really think I'd actually hurt you?" the Pole's voice chimed, crunching out his famous high-pitched laugh.

Matthew sighed, letting his head hang, "Feliks! This really isn't funny!"

"Okay, okay," he finally decided to remove the blindfold from Matthew's eyes.

When he opened them, the room was filled with all of Matthew's so called "acquaintances".

Then an oddly familiar woman from behind the crowd stepped forward. Her tan skin and lengthy jet-black hair was hard to miss. It was Reese Rizal,

in the flesh.

She stepped in front of the crown, walking towards me slowly, before speaking. "Hey there Matthew," her smile radiated throughout the room,

"long time no see."

The Canadian obviously could not believe his eyes, his counselor from boarding school was right in front of him. He honestly thought he would

never see her again. "H-How did you get here, Reese?" he asked, befuddled with her sudden appearance.

She nodded toward Feliks, who held his hands up, "Like, it was me. I'm totally guilty."

"I heard about your dilemma with your jackass— I mean boyfriend. Wait, I think I did mean jackass," she chuckled, "Feliks said you'd listen to me if

I came here and explained what happened instead."

"...Okay?"

Reese cleared her throat, "Well, before I explain. I gotta do this."

Reese pressed her very own lips to Matthew's.

When she broke free of the kiss, she asked, "Did I woo you?"

"_W-What_?"

"Feliks, I think I successfully wooed him. Can I have a million dollars now?"

The Polish man deadpanned, "No. You'd have to sleep with him too."

Reese made a face, "Sorry Mattie, that's not happenin'."

"Thank God!" Matthew cried, staring at her with a baffled expression, "Now tell my why you came here."

Clearing her throat once more, she started over, "Okay Matthew, I'm here to explain to you why Gilbert is on the verge of killing himself."

"_W-WHAT_?"

This remark earned her an elbow to the side of her stomach from Feliks. But Feliks, in return, received a hand to the face. "Let me work my magic,"

she whispered.

Though Matthew had not been paying attention to the duo that was quarreling five feet in front of him. His mind was wrapped around the fact that

somewhere in the Los Angeles vicinity, Gilbert was out there, hurting himself over the blond.

"Yes," Reese snapped Matthew out of his thoughts, "he's out there right now, depressed as fuck. You know. He called his older brother and told

him that he was sorry he was doing this. It was the only way he'd ever be able to get over you."

Bullshit.

"Where is he?" Matthew asked desperately.

"He's...I really don't know if this is a good idea—" Feliks said with a reluctant tone.

"Feliks, I swear to God if you don't tell me..."

The Pole rose a brow, "He's at his house."

* * *

><p><strong>Gilbert Beilschmidt <strong>

Like the Canadian, the albino man had been trapped within his house since the breakup.

He had no intention of seeing anyone, for he was sulking away at the loss of his love.

The same love that he had lost years before.

Plopping down onto his bed, he ran his fingers through his hair, debating whether he should call his ex. Even though he knew that Matthew would

never pick up his calls.

He'd already tried over twenty times this week.

Closing his eyes, he decided it would be best if he just tried to catch some sleep.

_Bssst. _

_Bssst._

_ Bssst. _  
><em>_

His phone vibrated. _  
><em>

_Guess my nap is not going to happen. _He rolled his eyes, flipping over so he could reach his cellphone tossed on his bedside table.

"Ja, what is it, _bruder_?" He answered, already knowing who it was that was trying to contact him.

Through the line, he heard a sigh, "_Why is it that you haven't picked up any of my calls for the past few weeks? Do you know how worried I've _

_been_?" Ludwig chastised, as the albino man listened.

Gilbert in turn replied simply with a word he seldom used.

"Sorry."

This was a shock to the Eastern German's younger brother, "_I-It's alright then. You could have called, but since you've apologized it's okay_."

"Is that all you have to say?" His voice was empty and cold, sending a chill down his brother's spine.

"_Do you want to spend some time with me and Feliciano? To get out of the house? You've been in your room for almost a month._"

"I'm hurting on the inside, bruder. I don't know how to deal with this."

Ludwig was silent for a few moments, "_Why don't you try to meet someone new?_"

"No." With that. he hung up on his brother, dropping his phone to the floor.

The light-haired man hadn't a clue on how to go about his problem. There was no way he could even try to forget about Matthew and move on, he knew for a fact that Matthew was _the_ one, and he fucked up.

Again.

This time, however, he knew for a fact that he was in love with this Canadian.

His heart would constrict every time he thought about the blond pancake-maker.

_Maybe it is time to move on... _Pondering over the thought, he hesitantly picked up his phone one last time and dialed the number that was so thoroughly ingrained in his head.

He waited for a few seconds.

Then a few minutes.

Which led to him waiting for a few hours.

That turned to days.

Days became longer, and it was then that he decided that it was time to give up on his love.

**...**

Francis Bonnefoy, notorious for lusting after practically anything that moved, was chained down.

_Whipped_ was a better term for his relationship with Arthur.

The trio were out and about hanging near the Santa Monica area, read to grab lunch, "Gilbert, what do you have in mind?"

A lack of expression said it all.

"...Alright," Francis sighed, irritated that the albino was being so difficult to manage. "How about you _mon cher_? What are you in the mood for?"

With a scoff and a light-hearted smile tugging at the shorter blond's lips, he replied, "Anything that isn't French would do. Quite honestly, I'm sick of all your lolly-gagging and your poor excuse for good taste in food. Obviously I want to go to a pub."

"_Mon angleterre, _you promised no more public drinking. You're only allowed to at home, remember?"

Gilbert's stomach flopped to the floor, _Oh that's right...they moved in together._

While he was drowning in his own self-pity over losing Matthew, he neglected the fact that time did not revolve around him.

Things changed, and obviously people were growing apart.

Since Antonio's disappearance, and Gilbert's absence, Francis found a new group of friends to hang out with.

The albino had felt guilty of course, but also betrayed. Though he knew the Frenchman loved his boyfriend dearly, it was as if he'd completely forgotten about the red-eyed man. Like he was an insignificant shadow among all the rest of the nameless faces he passed by each day. The thought of being forgotten by one of his best friends scared him half to death. But he pushed this thought away, venturing to other bothers that were eating at his brain.

What about his job?

Ah, who gave a fuck about his job?

We all know Gilbert didn't.

Snapping back to reality, he managed to catch the last tidbit of the lover's quarrel, "You can suck my bloody dick, Frog," the Brit smirked, pleased with his words.

The Frenchman only smirked harder, and much more sinister, "Well, if you're into it...But you should know by now, I prefer it when _you_ swallow."

Francis leaned into kiss the Brit, and their lips met in a less-than-chaste encounter.

They grinned against one another, chuckling as they pressed their tongues deeper inside the other's mouth.

A eerie, sick feeling dawned on him.

People were staring at them, but the two didn't give a fuck in the world.

They held each other closer, groping in all the places that seemed to piss the people who stared off all the more.

The Prussian man could swear that the Frenchman lived and breathed for the Brit, and that's what made his swelling heart ache.

He couldn't take it anymore. He blurted out, "I'm in the mood for Pad Thai!"

**...**

Now Gilbert had regretted ever coming out of his room.

The couple he was with had little intention of talking to him while they were seated at the restaurant.

They were basically to tongue-tied-up-in-each-other's-mouths to even notice his existence.

Rolling his eyes, he tapped his fingers along the edge of the table, patiently waiting for his food.

After a minute he groaned, "When's the food going to be here?" He dropped his forehead to the table, making a large _clang_.

Pausing, the couple looked at him, then back at each other.

Simultaneously, they said, "You need to get laid."

And that is when you stood up and left.

**_..._ **

Walking around his neighborhood for the first time in ages, he took in everything. Gazing around, watching intently as people gave him strange looks for watching them intently.

He was satisfied with the way people looked at him. Like he didn't belong. He liked being unconventional. He loved having a little bit of extra attention on him, even if it was negative. The feeling of being a 'freak' by people's standards was actually great to the albino. He had an excuse for everything.

Q: '_Why are you such a dick Gilbert_?'

A: '_Because I'm albino. i have a different mentality than you do, dumbass.' _

His albinism had become an excuse for everything he did, and he loved it.

But as he slowly walked back to his house, he thought of one thing he never had an excuse for.

"_M-Matthew_?"

* * *

><p><strong>Antonio Fernandez Carriedo <strong>

"How I fell in love with my little _tomate," _the Spaniard chuckled, "Alright, I'll tell you. On one condition."

The Italian rose a brow, cocking his head to the side.

Reaching out a hand to cup Lovino's cheek, Antonio whispered, "You have to promise me, Lovi. Promise me you'll never change."

A blush spread like wildfire across Lovino's cheeks, and he muttered, "Don't be stupid, bastard."

"Alright then. Well, I remember it clearly. Ten years ago we met in Biology, remember?"

Scrunching his brows, Lovino inquired, "Didn't we meet in Sophmore year?"

Shaking his head, the Spaniard said, "You were in my first period Biology class. We never talked until Sophmore year, but I always watched you from the other side of the room."

...

_At first sight, you were captivated by the short Italian, as he strode through the doors of your biology class._

_ First day of school, and he already had everyone in your class eating out of the palm of his hand._

_ He commanded attention like a military officer, and had the confidence of a supermodel. _

_With a little bit of height, he probably could be a supermodel, you thought to yourself, eyeing him from across the room._

_Though after a while, the attention on the moody Italian died down, and all the attention was solely on his brother, Feliciano. _

_Sure you thought Feliciano was cute, but there was something deeper with the auburn-haired Italian. _

_His attitude was never seemed to falter. _

_Saying and doing what he wanted, and still he had this his mysterious vibe around him._

_You carefully watched and observed, not wanting to charge up to him like the horny bull you were. _

_Halfway through the year, you discovered many quirks about his personality. _

_The good and bad, and how he half-smiled when his brother bounced up to him after __class to give him a bone-crushing hug, but would never let his brother see _

_that he was happy. It was rather endearing; his shy personality, disguised by a menacing _facade that everyone had grown so cold towards.__

__Then you began to wonder how he acted in other classes. You began attempting to track him down and figure out his schedule. You were a creep and you knew it. __

__If he ever found out that you got off to the thought of him changing clothes in the boy's locker room, he would probably never talk to you. Hell, you thought he __

__didn't even know your name. __

__But you were proven wrong one fateful day. __

_Scouting the cafeteria for that familiar face, you were interrupted by the sound of your best friend. 'What are you up to?' A thick German accent laced his voice, as __he jeered, 'Still crushing on that bitchy Italian, huh?' his lips curved upward into a knowing smirk._

_You deadpan, 'No, i'm looking for the mythical unicorn lair.' _

_An equally annoying voice arose, 'Mon ami, keep that up and you'll end up like that crazy Arthur kid.'_

_You flip both of them off, and say with a charming smile, 'At least I'm not the one who wants to fuck said crazy kid.'_

_Francis' smile dropped from his face, and was replaced with a look of scorn, he urged the Prussian to leave you alone, and they walked to the table the three of you __normally sat at._

_You turned your head, and a you could have sworn a ray of light led your eyes to the Italian sitting at the edge of table, pushing his food back and forth on his _

_lunch plate. Almost choking from happiness, you gulp, then make your way over to his table. _

_'Can I sit here?' you asked, knowing you wouldn't get a reply. Hell, he didn't even look up at you, but that didn't faze you in the slightest. _

_Feeling brave, you decided to start a one-sided conversation with the boy. 'Wow, you sure don't eat enough, you barely touched your food. I mean, jeeze, you think __you'd at least take a bite, considering the fact that your paid for the meal," you were beginning to become a little nervous, due to the fact that he had now put his __fork down, and began to glare daggers at you._

_'What do you want from me?' he asked darkly, venom dripping from his lips._

_You were taken aback by this, it was the first time he'd ever directed his anger towards you, and you began to realize why people never came around him. But you __persevered, not willing to give up. _

_Instead, you gave him your winning smile and said, 'Just wanted to get acquainted with you is all.'_

_He scoffed, 'How 'bout you do us both a favor and get the fuck out of my face.'_

_With a pout you countered, 'No! Not until I at least get you to smile for me,' the last bit turned into a whine, and you straightened your back a bit when his eyebrows knitted even closer together._

_Shit, you thought of the stupidest thing you could imagine. 'I wear boxers that have tiny tomatoes on them.'_

__'W-What?' His jaw slacked a bit, and his frown began to disappear. __

__You continued, 'Yeah, I grew fond of tomatoes after my father passed away. At first, I hated them. But now they're a reminder of the summers in Spain where he ____and I used to go out into our tomato fields and pick them all day.'__

__His reaction to your father's death was more than refreshing to you. Usually you'd get a look filled with pity, and a 'sorry' to go along with it. But he only nodded as ____his expression softened, and pressed further on the subject, 'When did he die?'__

__That was blunt. __

__He fixed his blunder with ease, 'When did he pass away?'__

__'Two years ago.' __

__With another nod, he started his own story, 'My mom passed away in August. That's why we moved here.' __

__A lump was caught in your throat, and you felt like an asshole. 'Wow, I-I...wow. Now I feel like a prick for bringing up the subject.'__

__Lovino's eyes widened, and his pink lips parted slightly. __

__You did it.__

__Watching in awe, you noticed his petite hand lift up in attempt to cover his mouth as he emitted the most adorable sound you had ever heard. __

__He giggled softly, looking at you with soft, hazelnut eyes.__

__That was it.__

__You felt your heart stop for a moment, then begin again, beating faster than it ever had before, making your face flush with heat. __

__From this point on you no longer had a crush on Lovino, you were in love with him.__

* * *

><p><strong>Matthew Williams <strong>

Matthew had attempted to call Gilbert a numerous amount of times, all which the Prussian did not pick up.

He was beginning to worry.

Sweat trickled down his forehead as he drove down the four-o-five freeway towards Gilbert's house like a maniac, receiving the bird from multiple vehicle drivers.

Once he arrived at his ex's home, he hadn't even bothered to park in the drive-way.

He merely drove over the grass in Gilbert's front yard.

Panting, he hopped out of the car, knocking madly on the albino's door.

No answer.

Tears began to sting at his eyes, as he dropped down to the floor, sitting against Gilbert's door. _Was I too late?_ he asked himself.

Drawing his knees up to his chest, he began to sob. _I fucked up. I fucked up so bad._

"_M-Matthew_?"

That sweet, German-accented voice rang into Matthew's ears, as he whipped your head up to meet ruby red eyes. Letting out a long sigh, relief washed over him.

Still crying, he stood up and tackled Gilbert, only knocking him back a couple of inches.

Wrapping his bare arms around the albino, he whispered, "Holy shit, I thought I lost you for good."

Gilbert was too shocked to respond, only returning the favor by placing his own hands around the Canadian's waist. But when the albino figured that this wasn't a dream, he whispered back, "You never lost me to begin with."

Chucking, the Canadian gave him a quick kiss on the cheek, "Don't think I'll take you back with just a few soothing words, asshole."

There was a bit of bite to his words, but Gilbert didn't mind.

He spoke honestly, "Wouldn't dream of it, pancake."

Burying his face into the taller man's chest, he let out a muffled response, "Mmf."

The albino rested his chin at the top of the blond's head, breathing in his scent contently, then asked, "Hey babe?"

"Mm?"

"Why is your car parked on my lawn?"

"I don't even know what you're talking about."

Shrugging it off, the albino invited the Canadian inside.

**...**

"So, Mr. Canadian," Gilbert began smoothly, making his way toward the couch Matthew was planted on, "your birthday's comin' up real soon. Two days from now," he paused, "do you feel like a big boy now?"

Matthew lifted a brow, "Wow, you remembered it."

Gilbert's smile dropped, "Why wouldn't I remember it?"

Shaking his head the Canadian said, "J-Just... we haven't been around each other. Thought you might have forgotten."

The Prussian dropped his gaze to the floor, "Forgotten? How could I have forgotten when _you_ were the only thing that was on my mind?"

Matthew stood up from his seat, furrowing his brows, "I... I don't know."

"Did you even once listen to my voice-mails?" Gilbert's voice cracked, and his body began to shake, "Do you not realize how much I cried over you? And seeing you now is just so overwhelming. Matthew, you have no _idea_ what I went through trying to get over you."

Amethyst eyes glazed over, avoiding the gaze of the man in front of him, "Well my life wasn't a fucking joy ride either," his voice grew louder, "especially when you find

out your boyfriend was only using you for money! Do you know how hurt I was? I thought you...I thought this was a repeat of last time. I didn't know if you really

loved me or not."

"Matthew I was planning on giving the money to Antonio and Francis! Why the fuck didn't you hear me out before? All this pain could have been avoided."

He chuckled, covering his eyes when tears began to drip from his cheeks, "How can you even think that I've never loved you? I've always loved you. Back then, I was

too afraid to admit it. I was a stupid kid. But now I know, and I can honestly tell you that I _do_ love you," he watched with eager crimson eyes, as the blond walked

toward him and tip-toed to kiss his lips chastely.

"Do you believe me?" Gilbert's question was a mere whisper, but Matthew definitely heard.

Matthew clung to the albino, placing one hand behind the back of the white-haired man's head, while wrapping the other around his neck.

The Prussian took this opportunity to nibble at the blond's ear, making the Canadian shudder in pleasure, as his tongue traced the outer shell of his lover's ear.

Pushing them both onto the couch, Gilbert let out a low growl, "I hope you realize that you are the biggest tease."

He looked down at the flushed blond beneath him, wondering how someone could be so perfect.

Laughing, Matthew smiled knowingly, cupping the albino's face in his hands, "Don't hate me?"

"Never," he grinned, swooping down to capture Matthew in another enticing kiss, pushing his tongue against the Canadian's lips.

The albino was straddling the blond, grinding his hips down sharply on Matthew's half-erect cock that bulged out of his pants.

Snaking a hand up the blond's shirt, the albino stopped to toy around with one of Matthew's pert nipples.

The Canadian moaned lowly, then lifted his arms up obediently as Gilbert tugged the hem of his shirt.

Pulling the shirt off, the albino gazed down at the pale skin beneath him.

Gilbert tossed the shirt onto the floor, and rid himself of his own article of clothing.

Tracing a finger from the blond's navel to this neck, he whispered, "Gorgeous," causing Matthew to blush even harder.

Matthew's cock was fully erect, pressing up into the Prussian's jeans.

Hunger filled there eyes, and before they knew it, the albino could feel his pants begin to tighten tremendously as well.

"S-Should we take them off?" Matthew asked in a hushed voice, receiving a nod from the crimson-eyed man.

Matthew fiddled around with his fingers for a moment, staring at button on Gilbert's pants, before Gilbert rolled his eyes and spoke sarcastically, "Any time today would be great, pancake."

Lowering his gaze, Matthew undid his lover's pants and pulled them down. He stared down at the chick-covered boxers that covered the albino's groin. The blond's lust was completely destroyed. Snickering and the steam emitting from the Prussian's face were the only things that could be heard.

Gilbert groaned, covering his eyes with the palm of his hands, "Boner killing boxers...fucking...why."

Matthew pushed himself up, causing Gilbert to crash onto the ground with a loud thud.

"Ow!" Gilbert whined from the floor. Even more so than before, the Canadian's laughter filled the room completely. He clutched his stomach, and the scarlet-eyed man saw tears crawling out of the corner of Matthew's eyes.

On his knees, Gilbert stared up at the blond and gently rubbed the other's thighs. The laughing ceased immediately, and was replaced with a barely audible gasp.

Gilbert was rubbing circles in Matthew's inner thighs from an awkward angle. Matthew shifted so his legs hung over the edge of the couch, making Gilbert smirk with a hint of victory. Matthew pulled his own jeans and briefs off, and Gilbert got to work.

* * *

><p><strong>Toris<strong>

"Are we in the clear?" Toris asked with a shaky voice. A Beretta was cradled awkwardly in his arms, as he gestured for his boyfriend to move from his position. Feliks rolled from under the table he was hiding under, then scanned the area.

"Pository," he answered seriously.

"Feliks that isn't a word... Can we please leave? I'm extremely uncomfortable right now!"

"Negatory," he replied again, but with a small smile playing at his lips.

Toris let out an exasperated sigh, then continued to follow Feliks reluctantly.

The Lithuanian man had no valid reason for agreeing to come along, he had just figured that he and his boyfriend needed to spend a bit more quality time together.

_This_ was not what he had in mind.

Currently, the brunette and his green-eyed beau were skulking around a stranger's home that they had broken into. Toris couldn't help but feel partially to blame. Feliks promised him a romantic getaway in a foreign country, but ended up committing crimes.

He swore that if he didn't love the Polish man so much, he would have walked away ages ago.

But shit was never that simple.

After turning a corner, Toris heard faint laughter at the end of a long, granite-covered hall. At the very end of the vast hall was a closed door, light emitting from the cracks at the bottom of it. He knew for certain there were people in there, and sweat began to trickle from his forehead.

"Feliks, this isn't a good i-idea. Kill...killing people, I mean."

Sensing Toris's uneasiness, Feliks nudged his boyfriend playfully, sending him a knowing smile, "Don't worry. Just _breathe_."

Striding down the hallway Feliks reached the door, placed his hand on the knob, opened the door. Without even stopping to see the people inside, his lover pulled the trigger.

The Pole's boyfriend's eyes were shut tight, as he heard a loud thud of a fallen body, and a sharp shriek. A female laid in the corner, sobbing over the body. Her body trembled, as she turned to look into Feliks's seemingly darkened eyes.

Kissing the man who laid in a puddle of his own blood, the woman sobbed, "_Per favore svegliati, Il mio amore..."_ Feliks completely disregarded the woman and her lover. He scanned the room, spotting the case that his boss had asked him to retrieve. The tanned Italian woman glared daggers at the green-eyed man through her tears.

She screamed at the top of her lungs, "_Lui era il mio marito, mi è piaciuto! Si lo portarono via da me..." _The woman stood up and slowly walked to her bedside drawer, and pulled out a small handgun. Feliks raised his own weapon, before he realized she was pushing it up to her very own temple.

She whispered, loud enough for everyone to hear,_ "_Per favore...lasciare ora._"_

Feliks moved slyly across the room to grab the case, then made his way quickly to the door,_ "Non dovete fare questo."_

__"Che io muoia in pace!"__

__"Mi dispiace, solanto_ il mio lavoro." _

As they walked out into the hallway, both men flinched as they heard one more gunshot, and one more thud.

**...**

Feliks drove the two away, driving in uncomfortable silence. Toris's head was turned, as tears clouded his vision.

When the brunette finally found his lost words, they sounded broken and icy. "How do you do it," he asked.

"I was trained to. Detach all emotions, that's how I was raised," he replied in monotone. It was too shocking for the Lithuanian, seeing his boyfriend in the act like this. It was as if he had never met this stranger before.

Toris became hostile, "I'm tired of sitting on the sideline watching you do all of this horrible shit!"

At this point, Feliks stopped driving. He pulled over to the side of the rode, and Toris began to panic.

Feliks looked at Toris, hard. He took Toris's hands in his, and asked, "How much do you trust me, Toris?"

"I...don't know."

The Pole's eyes found themselves staring at the steering wheel, "Well, you still _love_ me, right?" The blond's voice was shaky.

Toris punched Feliks's arm, and practically roared, "Of course I do! Why would I put up with any of your shit if I didn't?"

"Well I'm like sorry you have to put up with me, but if you don't want to, then you don't have to!"

The Lithuanian froze, "What are you saying? Are you...dumping me?"

Feliks paused, an appalling feeling collected in his stomach, "No. I...I can't have you with me, if you're unhappy. I'd rather see you happy with someone else, rather than to be unhappy with me."

A groan escaped Toris's lips. "I'm not unhappy with you! I just hate that you have to do this!"

Toris gently stroked Feliks's arm, and sighed, "I'm sorry I brought it up. I know that this is what you need to do. I understand." He brought up Feliks's hand to his lips and lightly kissed it.

Feliks leaned closer to his boyfriend, "I love you. More than anything, Liet. Don't ever forget it." He started his car again, and they began to drive toward the city.

"Trust me. One day you'll understand why I do it," he whispered.

**A melancholic frame story**

_"You're a fucking pansy-ass piece of shit. You wanna be a bitch? Fuck, we'll treat you like a bitch." His adolescent body was battered and pressed up against the cold, hard wood floor. His cheeks were cut and bloody. _

_His teeth ground together, biting back a shriek. He knew if he screamed, they would only beat him more brutally. A lecherous hand trailed up your skirt, "Does your family know you dress this way? The notorious killers...won't they be fucking delighted to see their faggot son being defiled." _

_A small click indicated that their was someone documenting all of this._

_Small gasps were elicited from his mouth, when his skirt and panties were pulled down. "No!" His voice was broken and cracked. The two men smirked down at him, one of them held a loaded pistol in his hand. The bulkier man gripped Feliks's hair, and harshly pulled him up. _

_He whispered into Feliks's ear, "If you scream, I'll make sure this bullet goes straight through your head." Feliks does nothing but nod his head. The other man chuckles, then spread the young Pole's legs open. Feliks's eyes widened in pure fucking horror, as the man between his legs bit down onto his thigh. _

_The bulky man gave him a toothy grin, then unbuckled his belt, and pushed his pants and briefs down. His flaccid penis lay limp in front of Feliks's mouth. "You know what to do, you bitch."_

**_..._**

_He was left on the side of the road across the street from his parent's house. Bruised and broken. His parents came out of the house. They pulled him up by his shirt, and spat in his face. "You brought this on yourself." _

_The Polish boy nodded, ignoring the tears streaming down his face. His father spat at him, "You're weak. If you want people to treat you differently, change. You will have no sympathy from us." _

_Feliks's father dropped the pictures of him being defiled, onto the ground. "Disgrace. You're a disgrace."_

_..._

_Feliks spent his birthday alone that year. He stayed in his room, and wondered why he was born into this family. He didn't want to follow his parents footsteps. He didn't want to do any of that. He did what he wanted. _

_There was a light knock on his door, and muffled voices outside of his room. _

_"Hello?" A voice sounded from the other side. The person came in, ignoring the obvious glared that Feliks sent their way._

_"Who are you?" Feliks inquired._

_The brown-haired boy smiled brightly, "I'm Toris, but my mumma calls me Liet!" _

_"Oh... I'm Feliks."_

_"That's nice! We should be friends!" The boy had come fully into his room, inspecting everything he could get his hands on. Feliks's eyes trailed after him._

_Feliks had never had friends before. "Friends?"_

_"Yeah. We can play games and share secrets and hold hands and stuff." Toris made his way to Feliks's closet. "We can play hide and seek!"_

_"No, don't go into—"_

_Toris froze for a second, "Wow! These dresses are really pretty!"_

_Feliks stared at him, "You think so?"_

_"Yes! They'd look extra pretty on you, though. You should put one on."_

_The Polish boy blushed, then made his way over to Toris. He lifted a box from one of the shelves in his closet, then dropped it onto the floor._

_..._

_"Wow, you look absolutely amazing!" Feliks twirled around in his black frilly skirt and white-laced top. _

_"You think so?" Feliks asked, smiling when he saw Toris nod his head._

_Toris lifted the box of girl's clothing, only to fall backwards. _

_Feliks lifted it off of him, and put it back on the shelf whence it came._

_The Lithuanian boy stared at him with awe, "So strong, Feliks."_

_"No. I have to get stronger."_

_"Why?" Toris asked, cocking his head to the side._

_"So my parents will love me."_

_Feliks sat next to the brunette on the floor, allowing his body to fall down next to him. They stared at each other._

_"Hey Feliks?"_

_"Yes?"_

_"You're really pretty. I don't think you need to change at all."_

**_..._**

_"Hey," an Italian boy said, eyeing you, "I heard you dress like a girl."_

_ Your voice had deepened by now, and you were going through an awkward teenage phase, "Yeah. I do what I want."_

_"I also heard you suck cock."_

_You were repulsed by this boy's vulgar choice of words, but you smiled nonetheless, "Like I said," your smile dropped, "I do what I want."_

_It was his turn to smile. "So you can do anything?"_

_"It depends what you want, duh," you say with sass._

_Romano grinned from ear-to-ear, "I have a proposition for you."_

**_..._**

_He asked you what happened, and you flat-out told him, "I've been raped and tortured, but that doesn't matter much to me anymore. All I want now is revenge."_

_"I can help you get that, all you need to do is help me."_

_Feliks quirked an eyebrow, "Your wish is my command, boss."_

**Lovino**

Antonio leaned against the cement railing at the top of a lighted staircase, awaiting his date. The past year he'd been living with Lovino, he was constantly stressed, worrying if his lover would make it home each night.

The vacation in Barcelona that he suggested hadn't exactly ceased over-active thoughts. He smirked, thinking about all the shit they went through the past year. All

the things he did for the little Italian. Leaving his career, his family... and all the friends he abandoned.

The Spaniard was just feeling a bit homesick, but he was sure things would change very soon. Tonight was the night to make his move. He fingered the small wooden

box in his pocket, and sighed. His plan had to be executed perfectly.

He needed it to be.

"There you are, you asshole!" Lovino yelled, almost completely out of breath. He was hunched over, breathing hard at the bottom of the staircase, "I had to fucking

search the entire city for you, you fucking bastard! Holy fuck!"

The Spaniard smiled, and walked towards his lover with his hands in his pocket. Lovino had yet to realize where in Barcelona they were in. Antonio had sent him on a

little scavenger hunt through the city without him. Antonio's eyes shone, as he manned his station. It was then that Lovino realized where they were. "The..._Parc de la_

_Cuitadella_...?"

The lights from the staircase luminated the small lake of the magnificent park. Lovino's soft breaths were hardly audible over the faint plops of the crashing water. The

statues stood tall over the park, and Lovino was captivated. He met Antonio at the top of the step, and allowed Antonio to slip an arm around his waist and lead him

to the center of the complex.

The hazelnut-eyed Italian seemed pretty floored, he turned to Antonio, who was pretty scared shitless.

"So, how are you liking my hometown?"

It took a minute for him to respond, but when he did, he was almost speechless, "It's...amazing."

"It really is, isn't it? But that's not why I asked you to come here. W-Well, it is, but not entirely I guess?" Antonio cursed under his breath. He was very very nervous.

Lovino hummed, passing him a curious glance, "Then what is the real purpose of you making me go on that damn adventure? That was a fucking workout."

With shaky hands, Antonio pulled Lovino's face towards him, and pressed his lips to the Italian's. They shared a sugar-filled moment, and right then and there, Antonio knew for certain that things would be okay. They broke apart, and Antonio stared into Lovino's pigmented honey eyes.

"Lovino Romano Vargas, I love you. I love you so much, I can't even begin to fathom what my life would be like without you. I want to spend every day with you,

because when you're gone I just can't seem to function right..." Antonio's hand searched through his pocket, as Lovino's eyes began to grow bigger and bigger with

each passing word.

"...I truly and sincerely believe that by some God-sent miracle, we are supposed to be together."

Antonio pulled out the box, and took Lovino's hand, descending down onto one knee, "I want to grow old with you. And I promise, if you let me, I will make you

happy."

He paused, and Lovino looked like he was on the brink of tears.

"Will you marry me?"

**Matthew Williams**

"Matthew, I need to ask you something serious, and you can't laugh at me." Gilbert was nervous as shit. He'd been planning this for months now, and he was kind of

worried about what his boyfriend would say. Would he take him seriously? He just did not know.

Matthew tossed around in his sheets, before peaking his face over the covers. "What is it Gilbert? Do you have any what time it is? How did you even get into my

apartment...?"Gilbert had to climb through his boyfriends window on the fifth floor to get in, but there was no way in hell he would tell his lover that.

"Your door was open."

"But I locked it last night?"

Gilbert paused, then changed the subject back to where he was previously headed, "So I wanted to talk to you about something serious, as I said before I was so

rudely interrupted!"

The Canadian smiled lazily, rolling his tired eyes, as he allowed his boyfriend to sit on the edge of his bed. "What is it then? Get on with it, you've already woken me

up."

With the loud clearing of his throat, Gilbert decided to rip the sheets of Matthew's body, which earned him a kick to the stomach.

"Get dressed! I'm taking you on a date."

Matthew groaned, "This early in the morning? Gilbert. Seriously. It's like five a.m., no restaurant would be open."

"I never said anything about eating, pancake. Unless, that's what you'd prefer to do," the crimson-eyed man winked lecherously.

"_Mon dieu_," he pinched the bridge of his nose, then released a sigh, "fine."

The couple left the apartment shortly after, and headed to a place where the two of them shared some pretty amazing memories.

Gilbert did the classic "surprised you with a blindfold" scenario, and the two of them drove in anxious silence.

"Are we almost there?" Matthew inquired, exasperation in his voice.

"Yup!" Gilbert brought the car to an abrupt stop, causing Matthew's body to lunge forward, then back to the seat. His hands were firmly gripping the armrest.

"Jesus. Your driving is horrible."

The albino pouted, exiting the car, and opening the door for the blond.

"You ready for this Matthew?"

"I...think I am?"

Gilbert smiled, "This is where I fell in love with you." He untied Matthew's blindfold to reveal the boarding school where they first met.  
><strong>…<strong>

"Whoa. This is... Whoa. I wasn't expecting this."

Gilbert shrugged his shoulders, "A lot has changed since the last time we've been here, but I figured that it still may have some sort of sentimental value. And I was

pretty much right. This is pretty moving, if the Awesome Me may say so."

Matthew looked around, the giant academy, with it's perfect ocean view. It was weird to him, and he had no idea why Gilbert brought him here.

"So...now what?" The blond asked.

Gilbert passed him a dubious stare, "Well..."

The Canadian deadpanned, "You haven't exactly thought this through, have you?"

Ouch. Matthew saw right through him. Gilbert winced, "Not entirely, but it's a lot more difficult doing this than you think, okay?"

Furrowing his brows, the amethyst-eyed man asked in a soft voice, "Are you breaking up with me?"

Gilbert cocked his head to the side, with wide, creepy eyes. He spoke in a monotone voice, "Yes, Matthew. That is the reason why I dragged you here. So I could break

up with you, kill you, then hide your body in a cave somewhere," he snapped his head back, "No, _verdammt_! Why the hell would I break up with you?"

"I don't know... you just had that tone of voice."

Moving toward the Canadian, the albino wrapped one arm around his lover's waist, then pulled him closer to his body. "You need to stop it with all this insecure shit."

Gilbert kissed Matthew's temple, "Pancake, you're perfect. And I wouldn't have you any other way than how you are now."

His face was beet red, as he playfully pushed the snowy-haired man away. "Stop lying to me."

Gilbert's face was a mix of embarrassment and shock, "_Ach mein Gott,_are you serious? C'mon Mattie. You're... really amazing. Both inside and out."

Matthew quirked a brow, and his lips curved up into a soft, warm smile. "What's gotten you all sweet?"

"I'm always sweet," Gilbert pouted.

"Yeah, okay."

There was a few minutes of nothing but squawking of seagulls and the serene crash of the waves. "Matthew," Gilbert began, breaking the silence, "there is a serious

reason why I brought you here."

"What? Are you going to propose?" He joked, chuckling a little at his own lame joke.

Gilbert's face was serious, but he shook his head. "No, but now you took the 'UMPH' out of my question. You overshot, dammit!"

"What is it then?"

"I've been thinking about this, for quite a while..."

Matthew stared at him.

Gilbert stared back.

"I think you should move in with me."

Matthew hadn't a clue how to reply to this. He hadn't a clue what to make of this situation, and right when he was about to give his response, the world blacked out.

And How Did We Get Here?

"Matthew? Matthew! Please wake up, holy fucking shit!"

There was a giant pound. Then a couple of more. Then Matthew realized that it was just his head throbbing. Everything was numb, and everything was dark. He

seemed to be tied up, and his body was pressed against metal. He felt like he was somehow...moving?

He opened his mouth to speak, but no words could be formed.

"Matthew, please for the love of God, wake up!" It was Gilbert's voice he could hear. He regained a bit of strength, and let out a shaky breath.

"G-Gil?"

"Oh my God, thank you Jesus," he sighed, you felt his lips press against yours, but you couldn't see him. It was too dark in the room.

Matthew was too drowsy to create coherent sentences, "What are we here?"

"...What?"

"Where?"

Gilbert was silent for a while, "I don't know what happen exactly. I think we were kidnapped though."

The blond sighed, "Feliks..."

"You think it's Feliks? That's actually a really good guess, but why would he drug us?" Gilbert thought aloud.

Matthew replied, groggily, "Shit happens."

"Matthew, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore."

"Shut the fuck up Gil."

Despite their situation, Gilbert laughed to lighten up the mood, "No but seriously, I have a feeling we're on a plane or some shit. I think a luggage fell on top of me or

something."

"'How the hell did we get here?' is a better question."

There was a shriek, followed by gunshots.

They hit turbulence.

Gilbert and Matthew both flinched, "What the actual fuck is going on, Gilbert?"

"Okay, how the hell would I know?" The albino was panicking, this was so not how he planned this date to go.

There were footsteps, all trailing up, before they heard a loud bang.

The open door let in the bright light that blinded them, and Matthew stared at the silhouetted figure.

"Feliks?"

The mystery man stepped forward, inching his way toward Matthew. This man was certainly not Feliks.

"Wrong. Don't you dare ever mistake me for that fucking faggot." The man was tan, with short dreadlocks tied into a ponytail. His eyebrows were thick, and his gaze

was menacing.

He gripped Matthew by the hair, and pulled him up.

Gilbert growled, "Let him go you piece of shit!"

"Ow!" Matthew winced, as the man threw him back to the metal floor. Matthew was a deer-in-headlights, when he saw the burly man turn towards Gilbert. The gun

directly pointed between his ruby-red eyes.

"No..." he whispered.

Gilbert was staring at Matthew, and mouthed, "I love you," before closing his eyes.

Matthew cried out, "NO! Please don't shoot him. Please don't! I-I can't. Please, I'll do anything!"

The man stiffed for a moment, then turned and smirked back at the blond. "Anything, you say?"

Gilbert shook his head, "No, Mattie don't do—" This earned him a kick to stomach. He wheezed in pain, then fell to his side.

The man told Gilbert to shut up and stay down.

He began to unbuckle his belt, and Matthew began to tremble.

He shut his eyes, and cried.

The man's hands were all over his body. Squeezing and gripping anything he could get his meaty hands on.

_Please make this stop._

The man pulled Matthew's pants down, and roughly pushed him over, so his face was grinding the floor.

_Someone please help me._

His hands were cold, and rough. They were eager and uncaring.

_Gilbert._

Matthew bit down on his lip hard enough to draw blood, as the man's dick pressed up against his ass.

_I need you Gilbert._

"I fucking told you earlier," Gilbert's voice rang through the (rather spacious) Captain's closet, "I don't want you to fucking touch him!"

The albino tackled the man to the ground, using the loosened rope around his wrists to choke the man from behind.

Matthew struggled to stand up with his pants around his tied ankles.

"Take his gun!" Gilbert yelled, struggling to hold down the now red-faced man.

The gun rested on the floor, right below the kidnappers feet. Matthew reached over to grab it, easily getting kicked in the face.

He bit the man's leg, and took it anyway, because he was that fucking gangster.

He took aim directly at the man's penis, and slowly placed his finger on the trigger.  
>"Mattie, do you know how to u-use that thing?"<p>

"Shut up and move."

Gilbert did as he was told and let go of their kidnapper who was, at the moment, completely out of breath. The kidnapper rubbed his bruised neck. Matthew kicked the

man in the throat, and gritted his teeth together.

"_Au revoir, salope._"

Then he fired.

"Are you alright?" Gilbert asked.

"M' fine. I just want to find out where we're going. And why this man kidnapped us."

Gilbert sighed, running his hands through his hair. "We have to stay low until we come to a stop though, there could be other people here that want to hurt—"

The door opened again.

"Oh shit, HAY GIRL."

Matthew aimed the gun at his best friend, who stood there with an amused expression plastered on his face.

"I see you've met Carlos," he paused, tapping Carlos's body with the tip of his shoe. "...I see you've killed Carlos," he said with a smile.

"Feliks, you are some sort of creepy."

Matthew dropped the gun to his side, walked up to his best friend, and began to bawl.

...

"So what is happening exactly?" Gilbert asked, once they were settled in one of the first class seats of the airplane.

Everyone around them (with the exception of Feliks, and Toris) was dead.

"Don't worry about it. It's just some killer business." Feliks giggled.

Matthew stayed in quiet in his seat, fiddling with his fingers. Gilbert touched his hand, and he flinched away.

Gilbert was hurt, but his expression was soft, "Do you need me to get you anything, Pancake?"

The blond shook his head.

Gilbert placed a gentle hand on his boyfriend's back, and caressed him for a while.

"Like, what the hell even happened?"

"Shut up Feliks," they both managed to say.

Feliks pouted while he muttered something about his two friends being ungrateful.

There was nothing but awkward silence and Gilbert's soft coos for the rest of the flight.

**Lovino Vargas**

"Ack!" Lovino yelped, after being tossed over his Spanish fiance's shoulder. "Let go of me, you fucker!" He giggled.

He punched at the ass that stared him directly in the face.

Practically hanging upside down, and Lovino could feel the blood rushing down his head.

Antonio replied with a laugh and the shake of his head, "No can do, _mi tomate, _I got a call from one of your workers and he said that this was pretty important."

"Who?" Lovino stopped struggling for a moment, "I haven't heard from any of those crazy bastards in months!"

The olive-skinned man groped his little fiance's ass, "Well, you're in for a hell of a surprise."

**...**

"What the fuck...?" Antonio put Lovino down, so the Italian could turn to look at the four men.

"Lovino? _Tonio_? Holy fucking_ Gott_!" Gilbert nearly shrieked, his mouth breaking into a giant smile. Antonio was pretty excited as well, and they both ran up to each

other in what had to be the greatest bro hug in the history of bro hugs. "Where the fuck have you been, man? I've been so worried, you don't even know!"

Antonio just shook his head, burying his head in the crook of his best friend's shoulder, "I'm sorry man, but I had to be with Lovino."

The Prussian pushed his friend away, taking him by the shoulders.

Crimson eyes narrowed, and pale pink lips stretched into a cheeky grin, he whispered, "I see that golden ring on your left finger, you silver-tongued devil, you."

Gilbert's eyebrows wiggled into a little wave.

Meanwhile, Lovino, Feliks, and Matthew all hugged each other in a super non-girly homo group hug.

"F-Fuck! Don't tell anyone this, but I-I really fucking missed you guys!" Lovino choke-sobbed.

Matthew was in between the two with his head tilted downwards, letting his tears stain his cheeks, "You just up and left, Lovino. You left without a trace. You left me

jobless. You _both_ left me friendless. I can't believe you were here this entire time. Who the hell even does this?"

Matthew's slender fingers ran through his hair, tugging down on it hard, as if he were trying to tear it off his very own head. "Do you not realize how selfish that was?

Do you know how bad things were for me there? None of you know how I feel! But it's not like either of you _give_ a shit!"

The Canadian was now hunched over, shaking. Lovino and Feliks passed each other a look, then knelt down before him to pat his back and attempt to comfort him.

Lovino sighed, "Matthew, I'm sorry. I had to make some tough decisions when I was planning my escape here, and leaving my two best friends behind was one of the

toughest. I swear, leaving was difficult for me as well, and fuck... I admit that I regret not telling you, but I did it for your own safety. What if you were kidnapped by

some of my enemies? I didn't want you to get hurt. The less you knew, the safer you were. That's why I left you both the way I did. And I'm sorry, because as fucking

corny as this is... you deserve to have a better friends than me and Feliks."

"Okay, hey. Speak for yourself, honey. I'm fucking fabulous and I totally kick ass. I am a dank best friend, bitch. Don't you forget it."

Lovino rolled his eyes at Feliks, and for once he actually sounded sincerely gentle, "I don't know what else to say to you, but if you don't want to talk to me right now,

I'd understand."

Feliks's confidence faltered, "I guess that, I'm like pretty sorry too Mattie." He rubbed his arm, turning his head away from his two friends.

Matthew looked up at Lovino and Feliks took their hands in his, "What you did wasn't okay, but I'm willing to forgive you for now. At least the three of us are here

now."

"This is _so_ gay."

"Shut up Lovino, we all need to like, wallow in our gayness every once in awhile."

Toris took this moment to awkwardly cough. He literally had no place in their little homo-reunion, but he could feel the gay vibes radiating off of their bodies.

Antonio and Gilbert came up to the scene of the F.M.L group holding hands, and they both started to laugh. "What the hell are you guys doing?"

The Italian and Canadian chose to ignore the question, but Feliks said something along the lines of, 'Nothing, just summoning Satan.'

**... **

"Well fuck, in the name of this holy church Cathedral (makeshift tent), do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

They were all just a bunch of friends on a beautiful beach in South Italy, and none of them could have asked for more.

The serene harmony that the waves made and the soft white sand turned everyone to jello. Everything about this whole thing was so peaceful and surreal.

"Jesus H. Christ, Feliks, _really_?"

Feliks clapped his hands, "Lovino, we're on a beach, and I'm not even a legit priest, okay? I got ordained online. Just answer the damn question."

Lovino wore a white, clean-cut tuxedo, while Antonio wore a black one. They looked absolutely perfect, and everything about the ceremony was perfect. It was a

shame the priest caught the influenza the day before their wedding. They had no other option but Feliks, apparently.

The Italian pinched the bridge of his nose, then exhaled loudly.

He looked up into his soon-to-be husband's emerald eyes, "I _really_ fucking do."

"And do you," Feliks turned to Lovino's green-eyed lover and paused dramatically, "take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

Antonio half-glared-half-laughed at Feliks, then turned to Lovino and whispered, "I do. With all my heart."

A few 'aw...'s came from their guests, but they were soon silenced by Lovino's dagger glare.

"Shit! We're all homosexuals up in this bitch, then! You may kiss the groom!"

Antonio pushed a few stray strands away from Lovino's forehead, then took his cheeks into his hands. Lovino wrapped his arms around his husband's torso, and tip-

toed to meet the taller man's lips.

When they broke apart, and eruption of clapping and whistling came from their audience.

Before the newly-wedded couple went to the mob of friends, Lovino took Antonio's hand. "You trust me, right?"

"With my life."

Lovino tilted his head and gave his husband an award-winning smile, "I love you. So fucking much."

"And I love you, Mr. Carriedo."

The Italian blushed, crossing his arms, "I only took your last name because I believe in tradition. Asshole."

Feliks chose this time to butt into their romantic conversation, "Yeah, because everything about this is totally traditional! You just had a gay wedding where you were

married by a fake gay priest with none of your relatives (albeit Feli), on a beach. I think this breaks every tradition there is."

"Fuck you Feliks."

The Polish man shrugged his shoulders, giving the couple a hug.

The newly weds greeted everyone from Gilbert and Matthew to Ludwig and Feliciano, attempting to run away from the albino who persistently attempted to throw

uncooked rice at them for good luck.

Their were only ten people at their wedding, but those ten people were more than enough for them. More than enough, for the pair was already as happy as they

could possibly be.

Matthew hugged Lovino and Antonio, "Congratulations you guys!"

"Thanks, Matteo!" Antonio smiled.

"Where's the honeymoon at?" Matthew inquired, curious.

Lovino sent Antonio a dubious look, "Yes, where is our honeymoon going to be?"

Antonio smiled down at him, "That is a secret that shan't yet be revealed!" He turned and gave Francis a less-than-sneaky wink.

Francis face-palmed, then decided to wink back, because you just can't leave a bro hanging like that.

"Okay...?"

**...**

All ten of them stayed in the guest rooms of the Carriedo couple's mansion. To be honest, they were all floored when they walked in.

No matter how much they all wanted to cockblock the newly weds, they couldn't bring themselves to do such a thing. Everything was too damn exquisite in the house

that they couldn't find the time nor motivation to do so.

Plus the beds were divine. They were clouds, figuratively speaking.

Speaking of beds, and the things that people do in them: Everyone in the house got laid that night.

_Everyone_.

**Epi_fuckingl_ogue**

...

"How's everyone holding up here, honey?" Antonio placed his large hand on his lover's shoulder.

Lovino turned and glared at his husband, "When the _fuck_ did we establish that you could give me that pet name?"

Antonio ignored his question, moving over to kiss his temple.

"I guess they're all doing pretty well. I talked to Matthew though, he's been saying that Gilbert's acting pretty weird these past couple of days," Lovino leaned into

Antonio's touch, "If he hurts Matthew, I'm going to cut his throat."

The emerald-eyed Spaniard sent him deadpanned stare.

"Just an 'F.Y.I'"

Antonio shook his head, "I'm afraid I can't let you do that, babe."

With a middle finger and rosy red cheeks, Lovino cursed in Italian, screaming and hitting his husband.

"Ow! _Lo siento_! I won't call you babe!" Antonio whined, nursing his brutally (but not really) injured arm. "Anyways, Gilbert's acting weird because he's going to do

something that he said was 'really fucking awesome that his pancake would definitely fucking love'."

Romano's eyebrow rose, "I wonder what the fucker has in mind."

**...**

"Gilbert, I absolutely refuse to be blindfolded by you.._.again_. I don't want a repeat of last time!" Matthew smiled, holding onto Gilbert's hands.

"Fine, fine. You're missing out though. The surprise is going to be slightly less awesome, but still pretty friggin' ridiculously awesome."

The couple walked along the beach shore, Matthew stopped to pick up shells every now and then.

"Why do you keep picking up the broken ones?" Gilbert tilted his head to his side, making a disgusted look, "The ones you're picking up are gross. Why don't you pick

up pretty ones?"

Matthew stopped walking, then turned to face Gilbert, "These shells are like people."

"W-What?"

There was a soft smile on Matthew's face when he explained, "They're fragile, and close to being completely destroyed. But even though they're broken and battered,

I still think they're beautiful."

Gilbert's pale fingers brushed against Matthew's sun-kissed cheek. He said nothing, he just took Matthew's hand and continued to walk.

"You're worrying me, you know?"

"Yeah. I worry myself sometimes too."

The Canadian smiled, "No, I'm serious. You've been weird recently. Have I done anything wrong?"

Gilbert narrowed his eyes, then began in a serious tone, "How can you even ask that question? I'm the shitty boyfriend! I should be asking _you_ that!"

Confused, was the correct emotion the blond was feeling at that moment. "You're not a shitty boyfriend, Gil."

His harsh tone faltered when he looked down at the giant, lavender eyes that stared back at him.

"Answer this honestly, Matthew... How much do you love me?"

Matthew hadn't hesitated, "I love you with all my heart."

The Prussian's mouth stretched into a giant grin. "Wow, that's a lot of love, Pancake." He leaned down and kissed Matthew's nose.

Matthew smiled, "And you?"

"More than you could ever imagine."

"Oh?"

"I love you from here," Gilbert pointed to his feet, then pointed toward the sun, "all the way to there!"

Matthew giggled, "All right, fair enough. When am I going to get my surprise though? I'm getting pretty restless waiting for you.

Gilbert licked his lips and smiled. "Okay, here we go."

Clearing his throat, he eyed his lover with an intense gaze. "I am absolutely in love with you, Matthew Williams. Completely," Matthew opened his mouth, but Gilbert

raised a hand, "and utterly in love. And I just want you to know that I would really love to spend the rest of my life with you. Bare with me, this is a little weird, and no,

I'm sorry I'm not proposing right now..." Matthew's smile grew, as he let out a breathy laugh. "I'm not ready to propose to you, _yet. _I promised myself I'd become a

better man before I do that. I want us to get married, and have kids, and I know that's physically impossible, but that doesn't mean we have to stop trying right?"

The Canadian bit his lip, holding back his words.

"I... I want to do this right, Matthew. You have no idea how scared I am. I don't want to mess up with you,_ again. _You're the greatest prize anyone could ask for, and

I'm so fucking grateful that I have you in my life," Gilbert paused, then pulled out of his hoodie a slip of paper, "which is why I want to take the first step."

Matthew's eyes widened, "YOU BOUGHT A HOUSE?"

"Yep."

"W-Why?"

Gilbert continued his spiel, "I want you to live with me. I have a job offer, and It's really close to the university you want to go to! And I don't know...I just. I can't

imagine my life any other way."

Matthew's hands were covering his mouth, "What about your house? What about my apartment?"

"We can sell my house. And we can move your stuff?"

"Oh _mon dieu! _Why didn't you tell me sooner?" Matthew cried. Gilbert didn't know whether his boyfriend was elated or pissed.

"I didn't want to overwhelm you... I guess."

They were both silent, then Gilbert asked, "So...you don't want to move with me?" He sounded heartbroken, but Matthew only slapped his hand.

"Of course I'm moving in with you! Don't be dumb Gilbert, I love you so much. I just," he sighed, "can't believe you bought this expensive-ass house on impulse."

"It wasn't on impulse though, I've been thinking about this for a while."

Matthew wrapped his arms around Gilbert's neck, and pulled him down for a kiss.

...

**The Williams-Beilschmidt**

_"Hey Gilbert, I'm on my way home, alright?" _Gilbert tried to feed this damn bratty kid some mush while holding his iPhone to his ear at the same time.

"Yeah, sure, Pancake! See you soon!" The little shit wouldn't accept his mushy offering. Gilbert tried to transform the food into an airplane, but the kid still wouldn't

budge! This was really frustrating. The albino hated how his own child completely refused him.

"See, if your Mom were here, you'd eat this shit."

"Gilbert! Don't cuss in front of him! His mind is a sponge at this stage, what if he starts developing bad habits?" Matthew questioned you from the garage door.

"Aw shit, when'd you get home?" Gilbert stood up, and walked over to kiss his wife. Er, husband.

Matthew leaned into his husband's touch, "Just now. Stop calling me 'mom' too, I wanna be Dad."

"Naw! I'm Dad, you can be Papa."

The Canadian made a face, "Way to make me feel old, Gil."

"We're not old yet. Don't worry."

Matthew sighed, "Yeah. We have a long was to go."

The albino sauntered back to their child, and picked him up. "This lil' guy isn't eating."

Matthew began to feed him, and the child willingly opened his mouth for the blob-like substance. This irritated Gilbert.

"Why does he like you and not me? I'm feeling a little bit unloved here."

"It's alright," Matthew looked up at Gilbert, "I'm sure he'll come around."

"When?"

Matthew looked down at their child, then kissed it's forehead. "I don't know, but we have all the time in the world."

Gilbert placed his head onto his husband's shoulder. And they sat. They sat for what felt like ever in their humble home somewhere the fuck in Canada.

**This is the absolute end**

* * *

><p>AN: I'm so fucking done._.

**Translations** (I'm sorry if they're wrong, but if I get a butt-ton of corrections, I'm going to ignore them. Please be considerate, because this fucking chapter was 13,000plus words, ok. It was not easy so blah!):

**_Per favore svegliati_**: Please wake up

_**_Lui era il mio marito, mi è piaciuto!: _**_

_**Si lo portarono via da me**: you took him away from me..._

_**_Per favore...lasciare ora_.** : Please...leave now._

__**Non dovete fare questo**: You don't have to do this.__

_**Che io muoia in pace!**: Let me die in peace!_

_**_Mi dispiace, solanto_ il mio lavoro**: I'm sorry, I was only doing my job._


End file.
